Out of Control

 ...is my life at the moment.  I moved five minutes away but landed in a world of snafus and perfectly cluttered storms.  And sadly I am going it solo.  For now, blog entries will be short.

Like this one.

Dinner last night:  Sandwich.

The Sunday Memory Drawer - The Color Purple

 

Not the movie, gang.  But you will see what this means as long as you read on.

Back after Robin Williams passed on at his own hand, I wrote a piece about just how fragile our minds can be.   And just how quickly things can go off the rails for even the more rational person.  The mind can be our best friend and our worst enemy.

In that blog entry, I mentioned my mother's own mental conflicts.  It started very simply.  In one of her first weeks of retirement, she tried to hang some drapes.   She fell and her sofa was the safety net.  She didn't break anything but there was enough physical trauma that her slowly-simmering arthritis started to boil over.  Within weeks, every bone in her body was sore every morning. And she didn't handle it well.

The body aches ramped up her thought process.  Already grappling with a forced retirement, boredom made the arthritis worse.   She started to become depressed and, at the same time, anxious every night as she anticipated the morning stiffness to come.   Calling her on the phone every day was a crapshoot.  I never knew what kind of mindset she would be in.

Ultimately, she sought the help and counsel of her family doctor.  And he immediately hit the prescription pad.

Pain killer.

Anti-depressant.

Anti-anxiety.

A chemical cocktail that sent her spinning.  And it wasn't long after that one of my daily phone calls to her sent me spinning.

"I think I want to kill myself."

My mother could have her goofy moments.  But the tone of her voice told me she was dead serious.  I also had a sense that, if she mentioned this out loud, the odds of her actually doing this was were low.   Nevertheless, I hit the Yellow Pages and looked to see what was available from Westchester County in the way of mental health assistance.

Surprisingly, there were several agencies that anybody can reach out.   My guess is that budget cuts have happened since and none of them exist now.   But I was lucky twenty-five years ago.

In her anguish, my mother had taken to not getting out of bed.   I finally did my own little intervention and paid a visit.  I told her that I had called a county agency and they would assign a psychiatrist to her case.

"I'm not nuts."

You're also not bedridden, either.  I pledged to disconnect her cable TV if she didn't at least see the guy once.

We negotiated a bit.  Essentially I got her to agree for the price of five Lotto tickets a week.  That was another weakness she had.   Lottery scratchers.   But I was willing to overlook that addiction for now.

As I have written most recently, my mom was not a person who shared her life's history.  Ever.  She had a sister and both had been orphaned in their early teens.  Their parents, my maternal grandparents, apparently died at the same time.  Likely from one of those killer influenza outbreaks.  I knew their names, but never saw a picture or heard any stories.  The motto in my house was like the military.

Don't ask.  Don't tell.

So, the thought that my mother was going to open up to some stranger seemed to be a dicey prospect.  And a huge waste of money if she simply went in there to discuss the weather or last night's edition of Jeopardy.

My mom's shrink was Dr. Frenkel and his big claim to fame were some studies he had developed with regard to lights and colors.  His whole business model was constructed around the notion that everybody had a key positive color and a key negative color.  The pro-color would trigger good sensations.  The con-color would spike your pain.  Naturally, you wanted to be awash in your good color and the way you do that is with tinted glasses.  Dr. Frenkel obviously had cut a side deal with Lenscrafters.

After his testing, Dr. Frenkel declared that my mother's positive color was purple. 

So now you understand today's title.

Of course, he had the direct connection to a pair of purple shades for $119.50, thank you very much.  Even more importantly, he also concluded that there was a two-way tie for her bad colors.  The ones that gave her intense pain.

Green and brown.

Holy shit. 

The furniture in her apartment?  Brown.

The wall-to-wall carpeting in her apartment?  Green.

If Dr. Frenkel was correct, my mother was spending her days in several shades of Hell.

Of course, Mom needed more than just a new pair of sunglasses.  Dr. Frenkel wanted to get to the bottom of her pain triggering colors.  And that would be done via a one-hour appointment every Saturday afternoon.

A new routine began.  I'd pick her up and drive up to the doctor's Scarsdale house.  After dropping her off, I would venture to a White Plains mall for a time-killing lunch and then go pick her up when she was done.  One Saturday, Dr. Frenkel was off his schedule and, when I came by to retrieve Mom, she was still inside his office. 

I sat patiently and quietly in the waiting room which was certainly not insulated for sound.  I could hear every word of Dr. Frenkel's session with my mother.  I thought quickly about covering my ears.  Maybe I'd hear something I didn't want to know.  But, my attention was piqued.

Dr. Frenkel had closed in on why Mom hated the color brown.

She was talking about a brown teddy bear.  She loved it so.  And, when she was five years old,  it was taken away from her by...

I walked quickly outside.  I didn't want to know.  Her pain and anguish needed to be private.

And I never did find out.  I decided that splurging on Lotto tickets was probably the least of what my mother had dealt with in her life.

Dinner last night:  Sandwich.

Classic Newsreel of the Month - October 2024

 The Holocaust finally is revealed.

Dinner last night:  Japanese hot dog at the game.

The Housing Market

 

Dinner last night:   Sandwich.

Hollywood Then and Now - October 2024

The backlot that is the streets of Los Angeles.   Always amazing.   Take a look at this infamous house from the classic movie "Double Indemnity."  It looks the same today as it did back in the 40s.  Film history at every turn.

Dinner last night:  Moving day.  Nothing.

This Date in History - October 9

 

Happy birthday in Heaven to Joe Pepitone.  A face only a mother could love.  And maybe not even that.

768:  CARLOMAN I AND CHARLEMAGNE ARE CROWNED KINGS OF THE FRANKS.

And you thought that was Oscar Meyer.

1238:  JAMES I OF ARAGON CONQUERS VALENCIA AND FOUNDS THE KINGDOM OF VALENCIA.

I hope he likes oranges.

1264:  THE KINGDOM OF CASTILE CONQUERS THE CITY OF JEREZ THAT WAS UNDER MUSLIM OCCUPATION SINCE 711.

These days, what city isn't?

1446:  THE HANGUL ALPHABET IS PUBLISHED IN KOREA.

Everybody's got a hangul.

1582:  BECAUSE OF THE IMPLEMENTATION OF THE GREGORIAN CALENDAR, THIS DAY DOES NOT EXIST IN THIS YEAR IN ITALY, POLAN, PORTUGAL, AND SPAIN.

This would make a shambles of that birthday app on Facebook.

1604:  SUPERNOVA 1604, THE MOST RECENT SUPERNOVA TO BE OBSERVED IN THE MILKY WAY.

Later put out in 1972 by Chevrolet.

1635:  FOUNDER OF RHODE ISLAND ROGER WILLIAMS IS BANISHED FROM MASSACHUSETTS AS A RELIGIOUS DISSIDENT AFTER HE SPEAKS OUT AGAINST PUNISHMENTS OF RELIGIOUS OFFENSES.  

So nothing much has changed in 2013.

1701:  YALE UNIVERSITY IS FOUNDED.

Harvard needed somebody to play.

1760:  DURING THE SEVEN YEARS WAR, RUSSIAN FORCES OCCUPY BERLIN.

How come WWII isn't called the Four Years War?

1812:  DURING THE WAR OF 1812, AMERICAN FORCES CAPTURE TWO BRITISH SHIPS ON LAKE ERIE.

How the hell did they get that far???

1824:  SLAEVERY IS ABOLISHED IN COSTA RICA.

So Costa Rica is ahead of the curve compared to the US???

1864:  DURING THE AMERICAN CIVIL WAR, UNION CAVALRYMEN DEFEAT CONFEDERATE FORCES AT TOM'S BROOK, VIRGINIA.

Next stop:  Tom's River in New Jersey.

1888:  THE WASHINGTON MONUMENT OFFICIALLY OPENS TO THE GENERAL PUBLIC.

No sequestering on that date.

1903:  DODGER OWNER WALTER O'MALLEY IS BORN.

Still hated in Brooklyn and unjustly so.  If you lived in Brooklyn back then, you'd move to Los Angeles, too.

1919:  IN THE BLACK SOX SCANDAL, THE CINCINNATI REDS WIN THE WORLD SERIES.

Pete Rose was betting then, too??

1936:  GENERATORS AT BOULDER DAM (LATER HOOVER DAM) BEGIN TO GENERATE ELECTRICITY FOR LOS ANGELES, 266 MILES AWAY.

That's one long extension cord.

1940:  DURING WWII'S BATTLE OF BRITAIN, ST. PAUL'S CATHEDRAL IN LONDON IS HIT BY A GERMAN BOMB.

Blimey!

1940:  BEATLE JOHN LENNON IS BORN.

Imagine.

1940:  BASEBALL STAR JOE PEPITONE IS BORN.

Who knows how to play "happy birthday" on a harmonica?

1945:  PARADE IN NYC FOR FLEET ADMIRAL NIMITZ.

Anchors away!

1948:  SINGER JACKSON BROWNE IS BORN.

The one day he wasn't running on empty.

1953:  ACTOR JAMES FINLAYSON DIES.

The wonderful comic foil in all those Laurel and Hardy movies.

1966:  DURING THE VIETNAM WAR, THE DIEN NIEN-PHUOC BINH MASSACRE TAKES PLACE.

Mother phuoc-er.

1967:  PHYSICAL CULTURIST JOSEPH PILATES DIES.

Physical culturist is a nice way of saying "gym teacher."

1967:  A DAY AFTER BEING CAPTURED, MARXIST REVOLUTIONARY CHE GUEVARA IS EXECUTED FOR ATTEMPTING TO INCITE A REVOLUTION IN BOLIVIA.

Don't cry for me, Bolivia.

1969:  IN CHICAGO, THE US NATIONAL GUARD IS CALLED IN FOR CROWD CONTROL AS DEMONSTRATIONS CONTINUE AT THE TRIAL OF THE "CHICAGO EIGHT."

Bad year for the Windy City.  First the Cubs choke and now this.

1970:  THE KHMER REPUBLIC IS PROCLAIMED IN CAMBODIA.

Rouge.

1974:  GERMAN BUSINESSMAN OSKAR SCHINDLER DIES.

This date was on my list.

1975:  MUSICIAN SEAN LENNON IS BORN.

I guess real Beatle fans knew that he shared a birthday with his dad.

1978:  FRENCH SONGWRITER JACQUES BREL DIES.

Not alive.  Not well.

1980:  POPE JOHN PAUL II SHAKES HAND WITH THE DALAI LAMA.

And promptly gets a squirt out of a bottle of hand sanitizer.

1980:  PRINCESS CAROLINE OF MONACO DIVORCES PHILIPPE JUNOT.

Mon dieu!

1980:  FIRST CONSUMER USE OF HOME BANKING BY COMPUTER.

Wait!  My balance isn't right.

1986:  THE MUSICAL 'THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA" HAS ITS FIRST PERFORMANCE IN LONDON.

The first of about a million.

1990:  AN OFFICIAL NEWS AGENCY IN THE SOVIET UNION REPORTS THE LANDING OF A UFO.

And you thought all the assholes were in Arkansas.

1992:  A METEORITE FRAGMENT LANDS IN THE DRIVEWAY OF A PEEKSKILL, NY DRIVEWAY AND DESTROYS A 1980 CHEVROLET MALIBU.

1-800-Geico.

1996:  CRITIC WALTER KERR DIES.

Please don't eat the daisies on my grave.

2001:  ACTRESS DAGMAR DIES.

About two people who read this will know who she is.

2005:  ACTOR LOUIS NYE DIES.

Bye-o, Steverino.

2006:  NORTH KOREA ALLEGEDLY TESTS ITS FIRST NUCLEAR DEVICE.

Bastards.

2014:  ACTRESS JAN HOOKS DIES.

A wonderful actress lost too early.

2017:  WILDFIRES RAVAGE NORTHERN CALIFORNIA.

No one usually mentions this, but most of them are started by a cigarette.

Dinner last night:  Italian sub from Jersey Mike's.

Len's Recipe of the Month - October 2024

Truth be told, I am moving this week.   And that comes with all that hated disruptive drama.  So I'm running a "Best of" this week on the blog.   

Now I've run this before and it bears repeating.   And, frankly, this just might be the first thing I make in my kitchen.

I've shared a lot of recipes here but this is the one I make with perfection.     It has generated lots of interest from my friends who bring Tupperware over whenever I make it.   Is it a terribly different recipe from what you make or your Italian mother-in-law conjures up?  Probably not.  But I know how mine tastes and hopefully yours will be as big a hit.

Here's my recipe for....LASAGNA!

First off, get one of those disposable lasagna tin foil pans.   It makes clean up so much easier.   

Pre-heat your oven at 350 degrees.

In a large pan or a Dutch oven, spread a little olive oil.   Chop up three cloves of garlic and saute.   Then add a 1/4 cup of chopped onions.   This combined smell alone will delight you.

When the onions are translucent, add two pounds of ground Italian sausage.  You can go mild, sweet, or hot.  Now, lots of people do this with ground beef.  I think sausage adds a wonderful flavor to this.   Brown it all up with the onions and garlic.   

Add two to three boxes of chopped tomatoes.   Yes, boxes.  You've seen them in the stores.  The tomatoes seem to taste better and, by swirling around a little red wine in the empty containers, you bring something really cool to this meat sauce.  Add about two tablespoons of tomato paste.   Stir it in.   Add oregano, Italian seasoning, Kosher salt, and pepper to taste.

Dinner last night:  In N Out Burger.

Now let it all simmer for about an hour.   The longer, the better.

When you're ready, spoon a little of the meat sauce onto the bottom of the disposable pan.  That's your base.   Get a box of those oven ready lasagna noodles.   They work fine.  Lay three across the bottom of the pan.  

You've bought yourself a container of ricotta cheese and hopefully you've let it come to room temperature.  Spread about 1/3 of the cheese on the lasagna noodles.   Then sprinkle liberally some shredded mozzarella cheese.   Use Sargento.  That's the best.

Now spoon more meat sauce over what you've done.   Now layer three more noodles.   Use the second third of the ricotta cheese.   Top that with some shredded parmesan cheese.   More sauce on top of that.

Keep repeating the layers with two cheeses and then more sauce.   When you're out of noodles, spoon more sauce over everything and then cover with a lot of parmesan cheese.  If you've got sauce left over, freeze it for a pasta night.

Put some aluminum foil over the pan and put it in the oven for about an hour.  Then take the tin foil off and let it go for another 15 or 20 minutes so it gets nice and toasty on the top.

This is a lot of food.   Have Tupperware on hand for friends.   Or make them bring their own.  Slabs of lasagna freeze wonderfully.

You're welcome.