811: IN THE BATTLE OF PLISKA, BYZANTINE EMPEROR NIKEPHOROS IS KILLED.
Nikephoros. Just do it.
1509: THE EMPEROR KRISHNADEVARAYA ASCENDS TO THE THRONE OF THE VIJAYANAGARA EMPIRE.
What a business card that must have been.
1581: THE NORTHERN LOW COUNTRIES DECLARE THEIR INDEPENDENCE FROM THE SPANISH KING PHILIP II.
FYI, I never ever paid attention in World History.
1745: THE FIRST RECORDED WOMEN'S CRICKET MATCH TAKES PLACE IN ENGLAND.
Where else?
1775: THE US POST OFFICE IS ESTABLISHED BY THE SECOND CONTINENTAL CONGRESS.
And immediately lost two sacks of mail.
1788: NEW YORK RATIFIES THE US CONSTITUTION AND BECOMES THE 11TH STATE OF THE US.
What took them so long?
1847: LIBERIA DECLARES ITS INDEPENDENCE.
Well, that's a load off my mind.
1875: PSYCHIATRIST CARL JUNG IS BORN.
The Jung for the Restless.
1882: PREMIERE OF RICHARD WAGNER'S OPERA PARSIFAL.
Wasn't he a reliever for the Angels?
1891: FRANCE ANNEXES TAHITI.
Well, if you have to annex something, Tahiti is a good choice.
1909: ACTRESS VIVIAN VANCE IS BORN.
Should be a national holiday.
1914: SERBIA AND BULGARIA INTERRUPT DIPLOMATIC RELATIONSHIP.
Like Ross and Rachel, they're taking a break.
1918: ACTRESS MARJORIE LORD IS BORN.
Make Room for Daddy's Wife.
1922: FILM DIRECTOR BLAKE EDWARDS IS BORN.
Unsung genius.
1941: SINGER DARLENE LOVE IS BORN.
Who does she sing that Christmas song for now that Letterman is off the air?
1941: US PRESIDENT FRANKLIN ROOSEVELT ORDERS THE SEIZURE OF ALL JAPANESE ASSETS IN THE US.
What will he do with all those sushi bars?
1943: MUSICIAN MICK JAGGER IS BORN.
Always getting what he wants.
1945: ACTRESS HELEN MIRREN IS BORN.
Mrs. Taylor Hackford to you.
1945: THE POTSDAM DECLARATION IS SIGNED IN POTSDAM, GERMANY.
Gee, that was clever.
1947: US PRESIDENT HARRY TRUMAN SIGNS THE NATIONAL SECURITY ACT OF 1947, THEREBY CREATING THE CIA, US DEPARTMENT OF DEFENSE, US AIR FORCE, JOINT CHIEFS OF STAFF, AND THE US NATIONAL SECURITY COUNCIL
Well, that created a lot of jobs.
1948: US PRESIDENT HARRY TRUMAN SIGNS EXECUTIVE ORDER 9981, DESEGREGATING THE US MILITARY.
For those of you who thought executive orders were invented by Trump and Obama.
1952: POLITICIAN EVA PERON DIES.
Not crying for you.
1963: THE ORGANIZATION FOR ECONOMIC CO-OPERATION AND DEVELOPMENT VOTES TO ADMIT JAPAN.
I guess the assets were eventually unfrozen.
1971: LAUNCH OF APOLLO 15.
Nothing happened on this flight, so no Ron Howard movie.
1990: THE AMERICANS WITH DISABILITIES ACT OF 1990 IS SIGNED INTO LAW BY PRESIDENT GEORGE BUSH.
See! He did do something worthwhile.
2016: HILLARY CLINTON BECOMES THE FIRST FEMALE NOMINEE FOR PRESIDENT OF THE US.
I've been off-line. How did this play out?
Dinner last night: Leftover sausage, peppers, and onions.
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