28 BC: A SUNSPOT IS OBSERVED BY HAN DYNASTY ASTRONOMERS AND THIS IS ONE OF THE FIRST SUNSPOT OBSERVATIONS EVER.
Global warming even then.
70 AD: TITUS, SON OF EMPEROR VESPASIAN, OPENS A FULL-SCALE ASSAULT ON JERUSALEM AND ATTACKS THE CITY'S THIRD WALL.
See! Walls can't stop people.
1497: AMERIGO VESPUCCI ALLEGEDLY LEAVES CADIZ FOR HIS FIRST VOYAGE TO THE NEW WORLD.
For those of you who always think that Vespucci was a liar.
1503: CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS VISITS THE CAYMAN ISLANDS AND NAMES THEM LAS TORTUGAS AFTER THE TURTLES THERE.
Since they are known again as the Caymans again, I guess the tortugas didn't stick around.
1773: THE PARLIAMENT OF GREAT BRITAIN PASSES THE TEA ACT, DESIGNED TO SAVE THE BRITISH EAST INDIA COMPANY BY GRANTING A MONOPOLY ON THE NORTH AMERICAN TEA TRADE.
A monopoly? Time to put some hotels on that property.
1774: LOUIS XVI AND MARIE ANTOINETTE BECOME KING AND QUEEN OF FRANCE.
Let's not get a head of ourselves.
1775: REPRESENTATIVES FROM THE THIRTEEN COLONIES BEGIN THE SECOND CONTINENTAL CONGRESS IN PHILADELPHIA.
The last time this country was bipartisan.
1824: THE NATIONAL GALLERY IN LONDON OPENS TO THE PUBLIC.
Gift shop to the left.
1837: NEW YORK CITY BANKS FAIL AND UNEMPLOYMENT REACHES RECORD LEVELS.
President Van Buren to NY: Drop Dead.
1838: ACTOR JOHN WILKES BOOTH IS BORN.
Which mean he was just 27 when he shot Lincoln in 1865.
1865: AMERICAN CIVIL WAR - JEFFERSON DAVIS IS CAPTURED BY US TROOPS NEAR GEORGIA.
Rounding up the usual suspects.
1872: VICTORIA WOODHULL BECOMES THE FIRST WOMAN NOMINATED FOR PRESIDENT OF THE US.
How far did that get?
1888: FILM COMPOSER MAX STEINER IS BORN.
Just for "A Summer Place," this date needs to be a national holiday.
1893: THE SUPREME COURT OF THE US RULES THAT A TOMATO IS A VEGETABLE, NOT A FRUIT.
How did Ginsberg vote?
1899: ACTOR FRED ASTAIRE IS BORN.
Genius.
1904: THE HORCH AND CIR. MOTORWAGENWERKE AG IS FOUNDED. THIS LATER BECOMES AUDI.
Smart move to shorten that name.
1908: MOTHER'S DAY IS OBSERVED FOR THE FIRST TIME IN THE US.
Paging Hallmark Cards.
1922: ACTOR NANCY WALKER IS BORN.
Watch the old Rhoda reruns to see just how good she was.
1924: J. EDGAR HOOVER IS APPOINTED FIRST DIRECTOR OF THE US FBI AND REMAINS SO UNTIL HIS DEATH IN 1972.
Bet he had a special day for the occasion.
1940: WORLD WAR II - WINSTON CHURCHILL IS APPOINTED PRIME MINISTER OF THE UNITED KINGDOM FOLLOWING THE RESIGNATION OF NEVILLE CHAMBERLAIN.
When he visited the White House, he was once spotted walking around the place naked. You can look it up.
1941: RUDOLF HESS PARACHUTES INTO SCOTLAND TO TRY TO NEGOTIATE A PEACE DEAL BETWEEN THE UNITED KINGDOM AND NAZI GERMANY.
I guess Hess ran out of gas.
1954: BILL HALEY AND HIS COMETS RELEASE "ROCK AROUND THE CLOCK," THE FIRST ROCK AND ROLL RECORD TO REACH NUMBER ONE.
Still an infectious song.
1957: MUSICIAN SID VICIOUS IS BORN.
Kudos to Ma and Pa Vicious.
1962: MARVEL COMICS PUBLISHES THE FIRST ISSUE OF THE INCREDIBLE HULK.
And the green never stops rolling in.
1968: ACTOR SCOTTY BECKETT DIES.
Hal Roach outlived him by about forty years.
1975: SONY INTRODUCES THE BETAMAX VIDEOCASSETTE RECORDER IN JAPAN.
Raise your hand if you still have one. I see no hands.
1977: ACTRESS JOAN CRAWFORD DIES.
Goodbye, Mommie Dearest.
1994: NELSON MANDELA IS INAUGURATED AS SOUTH AFRICA'S FIRST BLACK PRESIDENT.
Yeah, this was some sort of a big deal.
2000: ACTOR CRAIG STEVENS DIES.
Gunn no longer loaded.
2001: ACTRESS DEBORAH WALLEY DIES.
A friend of ours. Nice lady gone too early.
2005: A HAND GRENADE LANDS NEAR PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH WHILE HE IS GIVING A SPEECH IN TBILISI, GEORGIA. IT MALFUNCTIONS AND DOES NOT DETONATE.
You're fired.
2011: SINGER NORMA ZIMMER DIES.
"The lovely Champagne Lady."
2013: ONE WORLD TRADE CENTER BECOMES THE TALLEST BUILDING IN THE WESTERN HEMISPHERE.
USA! USA!!
Dinner last night: Chopped chef's salad.
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