See The Movie, Buy The Soundtrack

Or if gut crunching, neck cracking, knee breaking violence isn't your thing, just buy the soundtrack.   The latter is the best part of "Atomic Blonde" anyway.

We go back to the late 80s when President Reagan has told Gorbachev to "take down that wall."  All mayhem is breaking out just as this is supposed to happen and there's some important government file that has gone missing or perhaps to Russia.  Isn't everything about Russia these days?

Well, Charlize Theron plays a secret agent for either Great Britain, the US, or maybe Lower Slobovia and she is entrusted to get it back.   So off to Germany she goes and there's a sinister Russian hiding behind every corner.   And aren't there always sinister Russians hiding behind every corner these days?  Have no fear.  Theron meets everyone of them with a painful groin kick, a snap of the neck, and, for one unfortunate foe, a set of keys lodged firmly in his cheek.

Naturally, none of this makes any sense just like everything going on with Russia these days.  You are thoroughly confused about who is playing on which team but that I believe is the objective of director David Leitch who adapted this all from some graphic novel I never read.   Wait, have I ever read a graphic novel to begin with?

If this all sounds like a big old thumbs down from me, it's not.   There was something about "Atomic Blonde" that was oddly entertaining to me.  Sure, when you get to the 39th or 40th fight scene, you do think that the violence is excessive.  But something about it in this movie sort of raised it to the type of nastiness you might wind in a Road Runner cartoon.   They're having a lot of pain up on the screen, but you know it's just for fun.   

Of course, as prefaced above, the real star of "Atomic Blonde"...sorry, Charlize...is the wonderful 80s soundtrack with the biggest hits of the decade playing behind all the nonsense.   From Til Tuesday to the late great George Michael to several from the later and greater David Bowie.   The stuff never sounded better than when it was punctuating some scene where Theron was castrating some Russian with her high heel.

And, gee, do we wish we could castrate some Russians these days?

LEN'S RATING:  Three stars for the movie.  Four stars for the soundtrack.

Dinner last night:  Salad.