Your Weekend Movie Guide for January 2018

Sadly, another local theater gem is dead.    The wonderful Crest on Westwood Boulevard has a big "for lease" sign on the marquee.   It's already come back from the dead once.   I doubt it can do it again.   I will miss the wonderful interiors with its art deco mural of vintage Hollywood and the shooting star on the theater.   Oddly, the theater plays an important role in "The Disaster Artist."  Hopefully, someone steps forward to save the building and preserves it as a movie theater.

So what's at the local AMC or Cinemark where the job is to move audiences in and out like sheep?   You know the drill, gang.  I will sift through the LA Times movie pages and give you my knee jerk reaction to what's annoying us at the multiplex.

If you can, though, please patronize your local neighborhood theater this weekend.   You never know how long they will last.

Jumanji - Welcome to the Jungle:   Wondering out loud if any millennials have named their babies "Jumanji."

Paddington 2:  Likely unbearable.

Insidious - The Last Key:  I never saw "Insidious - The First Key."

The Post:  Blog review coming.  All the news that's fit to print.

The Commuter:  The annual January action thriller from Liam Neeson that are always surprisingly entertaining.  This one is allegedly set on my old train line, Metro North Hudson division.  I bet a blog review is coming.

The Greatest Showman:  Blog review coming.   Boy, that Hugh Jackman sure is talented.

Star Wars - The Last Jedi:  Boy, did Carrie Fisher's death screw up their plot.

Proud Mary:  Keep on burning...the film, that is.

Last Call Pitches:   I saw the first installment of the Pitch Perfect franchise.   I thought it was cute but there was no place to go with the plot.  Naturally, they made two more.

Darkest Hour:  Blog review coming.   Great performance by Gary Oldman as Winston Churchill, but, let's face it, he had a lot to work with.

Molly's Game:   Aaron Sorkin now writes and directs.   This is your first warning.

Ferdinand:   Bull-shit.

Coco:  It's official.   Pixar now completely bores me.

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri:   I have a sense Frances McDormand has another Oscar coming.

The Shape of Water:  The year's bi-polar movie.   I know people who loved it.  I know people who detested it.

I, Tonya:  Blog review coming.  Who knew two hours with stupid and detestable people could be so much fun?

All the Money in the World:   I hear it's not very good but it would be interesting to see only because they had to do some Kevin Spacey-less reshooting four weeks before it opened.   

Wonder:   Of the four 2017 movies with "Wonder" in the title, this one was the best.

Call Me By Your Name:  A good concept totally sabotaged by some Kevin Spacey-like optics.   

The Disaster Artist:   Reviewed here just the other day.  Totally enjoyable.   I thought this would get James Franco an Oscar nomination...now, not so much.

Downsizing:  Horrible buzz to "Honey, I Shrunk the Adults."

Thor - Ragnarok:  Whoever...

Phantom Thread:   The movie from 2017 most likely to cure insomnia.

Den of Thieves:   Either Congress or CNN.

Forever My Girl:   Sounds like it escaped from the Hallmark Channel.

Mom and Dad:   The parents are Nicolas Cage and Selma Blair.   What must the kids look like?

Small Town Crime:   Andy and Barney must be on vacation.

The Final Year:   A documentary on Obama's last year in office.   Watch as he walks on water and turns water into wine.

Delirium:   I think you take that when you've got the flu.

Kangaroo:   A documentary on...you guessed it.

12 Strong:  About the first US troops into Iran after 9/11.   Well, somebody had to go first.

The Road Movie:  Nope, not Hope, Crosby, and Lamour.   It's actually a documentary about Russian dashboard cams.   Collusion there, too, I guess.

Dinner last night:  Chicken lettuce wraps left over from lunch.