1533: CONQUISTADORS FROM SPAIN UNDER THE LEADERSHIP OF FRANCISCO PIZZARO ARRIVE IN CAJAMARCA.
Francisco Pizzaro? Wasn't he a lefthander with the Chicago White Sox?
1770: JAMES BRUCE DISCOVERS WHAT HE BELIEVES TO BE THE SOURCE OF THE NILE.
Turns out it was a leak underneath his bathroom sink.
1862: PRESIDENT ABRAHAM LINCOLN APPROVES GENERAL AMBROSE BURNSIDE'S PLAN TO CAPTURE THE CONFEDERATE CAPITAL AT RICHMOND, VIRGINIA.
And whatever Abe says, goes.
1889: FEMALE JOURNALIST NELLIE BEGINS A SUCCESSFUL ATTEMPT TO TRAVEL AROUND THE WORLD IN LESS THAN 80 DAYS. SHE COMPLETES THE TRIP IN 72 DAYS.
And misses a chance to be in a movie with David Niven and Cantinflas.
1889: INDIAN PRIME MINISTER JAWAHARIAL NEHRU IS BORN.
Wardrober to Sammy Davis Jr.
1896: FIRST LADY MAMIE EISENHOWER IS BORN.
And probably looked old in the crib.
1904: ACTOR DICK POWELL IS BORN.
Probably was smoking in his crib.
1908: SENATOR JOSEPH MCCARTHY IS BORN.
Should have died in his crib.
1910: AVAITOR EUGENE BLY PREFORMS THE FIRST TAKE OFF FROM A SHIP IN VIRGINIA.
Those Blys are crafty.
1915: ACTIVIST BOOKER T. WASHINGTON DIES.
And that makes for some sad MGs.
1916: TV PRODUCER SHERWOOD SCHWARTZ IS BORN.
Creator of the two crappiest TV shows in history.
1918: CZECHOSLOVAKIA BECOMES A REPUBLIC.
Czech, please.
1921: THE COMMUNIST PARTY OF SPAIN IS FOUNDED.
So that explains why the cape they wave in front of the bull is red.
1921: ACTOR BRIAN KEITH IS BORN.
Uncle Bill!
1922: THE BBC BEGINS RADIO SERVICE IN THE UNITED KINGDOM.
Their first show? Lord Amos and Duke Andy.
1927: ACTOR MCLEAN STEVENSON IS BORN.
Hello, Larry.
1929: BASEBALL PLAYER JIMMY PIERSALL IS BORN.
When he was on the Mets, he hit his 100th homerun and ran the bases backwards. Since it was the Mets, nobody noticed.
1940: IN ENGLAND, THE CITY OF COVENTRY IS HEAVILY BOMBED BY GERMAN LUFTWAFFE BOMBERS.
Show of hands, please, for those of you who have also been heavily bombed.
1957: THE APALACHIN MEETING IN BINGHAMTON, NEW YORK, IS RAIDED AND MANY HIGH LEVEL MAFIA FIGURES ARE ARRESTED.
Sounds like an episode of the Sopranos from Season 3.
1969: NASA LAUNCHES APOLLO 12, THE SECOND MANNED MISSION TO THE MOON.
Nobody remembers who was on this one.
1979: US PRESIDENT JIMMY CARTER ISSUES EXECUTIVE ORDER 12170, FREEZING ALL IRANIAN ASSETS IN RESPONSE TO THE HOSTAGE CRISIS.
Yeah, he was really on top of this situation.
1982: LECH WALESA, THE LEADER OF POLAND'S SOLIDARITY MOVEMENT, IS RELEASED AFTER ELEVEN MONTHS OF INTERNMENT.
For 11 years, there was a lot Less Walesa.
1991: IN ROYAL OAK, MICHIGAN, A FIRED US POSTAL SERVICE EMPLOYEE GOES ON A SHOOTING RAMPAGE, KILLING FOUR AND WOUNDING FIVE.
Do you need that certified?
1997: JOCKEY EDDIE ARCARO DIES.
Finishing out of the money.
2000: JOURNALIST ROBERT TROUT DIES.
Trout out of the water and into the ground.
2002: ACTOR EDDIE BRACKEN DIES.
It was all downhill after Preston Sturges died anyway.
Dinner last night: Leftover London broil and vegetables.
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