#OscarsSoDead

Regular readers might remember my two favorite Hollywood insiders, Saul and Heshe, who used to bitch, moan, and groan about Tinseltown over their pastrami sandwiches at Nate N' Al's deli in Beverly Hills.  Well, sadly, I must announce that the two oldtimers are both now dead.   Killed by cold cuts that should have been served extra lean.

But, truly, had Saul and Heshe lived, they would have been killed this past Tuesday morning when the latest Oscar nominations were announced.    The ludicrousness of the award hopefuls this year would have clearly started a funeral cortege for Saul and Heshe to Forest Lawn.  

Indeed, the Oscars have themselves to blame.  With this push for diversity, the Academy Awards have completely fallen off the rails.  Or, I guess, jumped the shark.   I mean, look at the eight films nominated for Best Picture.

BlacKkKlansman:   This got the detestable Spike Lee an Oscar nod.   Did you all feel the world come a little bit off its axis?

Black Panther:   A ridiculous excuse for what is nothing but a super hero movie.

Bohemian Rhapsody:   I hear this is one of the two that are worthy of this list.   I have not seen it, but will.

The Favourite:   One of the worst movies I have seen in my life.

Green Book:   Probably the best film I saw in 2018.   There wasn't a lot of competition.

Roma:  Should be called "Coma" for the damage it inflicts upon the viewer.  Nothing happens for two plus hours.   And then, out of nowhere, there is a ten minute scene where you graphically watch a baby come out of the womb still-born.  Yeeesh.

A Star Is Born:   This remake actually made the Barbra Streisand version look good.   I thought that was impossible.

Vice:   I have a screener on the way, but I hear this is one super slow movie.

And there you have it.   Perhaps the most lackluster list of Best Picture nominees in history.  Add to this the fact that the Academy can't find a host who hasn't made an offensive tweet in the past decade.   The end result should be an Oscar telecast with the lowest ratings in history.   

And deservedly so.

Oddly enough, I made a New Year's resolution to watch every Best Picture winner in one single year.   I've already made a dent by watching the following:

Grand Hotel.

It Happened One Night.

You Can't Take It With You.

Rebecca.

Casablanca.

The Lost Weekend.

All About Eve.

On the Waterfront.

Marty.

The Artist.

Spotlight.

Even the overhyped "The Artist" is more worthy of the award than any of the 2018 nominations.

Saul and Heshe....Rest in Peace.

Dinner last night:  The last of leftover lasagna...for a while.