But, apparently, Hollywood with masks in tow still wants to bend over backwards to congratulate themselves. So out come the DVDs sent to voting members. And, sometimes, me. I won't reveal my source. But, trust me. I have my pick of the litter.
And most of it is just that. Litter.
Now today's reviewed movie can actually be found on Netflix if you are so inclined to look for it. After reading further, that might be doubtful. Indeed, the DVD I screened it from has already been tossed around my apartment like a Frisbee.
I was intrigued in the first place because "Malcolm and Marie" is allegedly the first film to be filmed completely during the COVID-19 pandemic. It was shot quickly last May and June. Of course, you don't to worry about social distancng among the cast. There are only two people in it.
For some bizarre reason, the movie opens with the full credits that you usually see on the scrawl at the end. Except the font is so small and squeezed that it looks like how they scrunch together credits on TV reruns. But, have no fear. They run the full credits at the end with a much more legible font. I guess the crew wanted to make sure their names were recognized. I mean, that's the least that can be done for a bunch of technicians who had to hang around all day getting their temperatures taken.
So what is "Malcolm and Marie" and why? Well, the stars are John David Washington (the son of the annoying Denzel) and somebody named Zendaya who has been in a bunch of stuff I never saw. They are boyfriend and girlfriend. Director and actress. And they have just come home to a very nifty house after his latest movie has premiered. He is awaiting to hear what the white film critic from the LA Times thought of his movie.
From the very first word, Malcolm is pretentious, self-centered, and vile. And those are the good qualities. Meanwhile, Marie hangs around to eat a bowl of macaroni and cheese while he rants and raves all over the property.
Slowly, stuff comes out. The movie he made is about how he found his own girlfriend in the gutter and got her off drugs. Except he didn't bother to give her the chance to play herself in the movie. And she is pissed, not only about that but also he forgot to thank her in his speech earlier in the evening.
And that is it. First, it's Malcolm's turn to whine. Then it's Marie's turn. Then it's Malcolm's turn. Then it's Marie's turn. Back and forth and back and forth and.....insert big yawn.
The director of this swill is Sam Levinson (the son of director Barry) and I couldn't think of a less necessary movie that this one. To be stylish, he shoots it all in black and white. Or maybe that's the only camera he had. Nevertheless, "Malcolm and Marie" couldn't be more aimless and pointless.
Which probably means that, in this upside world of 2020 and 2021, it will grab a dozen nominations from the Academy.
LEN'S RATING: One-and-a-half stars.
Dinner last night: Leftover Chinese food.
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