The Prom Gallery of 2019

 Tuck in your shirt!!

 "My hair is longer than yours."

 Anybody want to address the purple dinosaur in the room?

 Look what I stepped in getting out of the limo.

 The Diversity High School Senior Prom.

 "You killed with that outfit."

 And later in the evening...

 It took him two hours longer to get his hair ready.

 "Is everything on you this big?"

 Hope her water doesn't break on the dance floor?

 The school's senior prom had a theme.  The movie "Alien."

Who trimmed your mane?

Dinner last night:  Dodger Dog at the game.

Len's Recipe of the Month - May 2019

We're going to have to pare down this photo to get at this month's recipe.  

Is it the caramelized onions at the top of the picture?   Nope.  I already gave you that recipe.

Is it the marinated cucumbers?  Nada.   I already gave you that recipe.

Is it for the chicken thighs?   Zip.  You should know how to make those.

This month's focus is on the barbecue sauce that adorns the thighs.  And guess what?  It didn't come from a bottle or a jar.   I made it from scratch and you can, too.  It's so easy.

In a small pot, mix the following:

5 tablespoons of ketchup.

3 tablespoons of brown sugar.

1 tablespoon of Dijon mustard.

3 tablespoons of honey.

2 tablespoons of apple cider vinegar.

1 tablespoon of Worcestershire sauce.

1 teaspoon of soy sauce.

Blend it all together.   Heat on low.  When the sugar is dissolved and the sauce is suitably thickened, slather it on whatever you want to use it on.  

Enjoy!   And you're welcome.

Dinner last night:  The last of the leftover beef tri-tip.

This Date in History - May 29

Happy birthday, John Hinckley Jr.  I'll bet Jodie Foster's not mentioning you in her blog today.

363:  ROMAN EMPEROR JULIAN DEFEATS THE SASSANID ARMY IN THE BATTLE OF CTESIPHON, BUT IS UNABLE TO TAKE THE CITY.

Take the city?  I'll bet they can't even pronounce it.

1167:  A ROMAN ARMY SUPPORTING POPE ALEXANDER III IS DEFEATED BY CHRISTIAN OF BUCH AND RAINALD OF DASSEL.  

And Dicker and Dicker of Beverly Hills.

1414:  COUNCIL OF CONSTANCE.

Constance who?  Towers?  Ford?  McCashin?  History needs to be more explicit.

1453:  OTTOMAN ARMIES UNDER SUITAN MEHMED II FATIH CAPTURES CONSTANTINOPLE AFTER A 53-DAY SIEGE, ENDING THE BYZANTINE EMPIRE.

I'm sure that fact was on a World History quiz that I failed.

1660:  CHARLES II IS RESTORED TO THE THRONE OF ENGLAND, SCOTLAND AND IRELAND.

With a new crown and a fresh coat of paint.

1727:  PETER II BECOMES TSAR OF RUSSIA.

Tstupendous.

1790:  RHODE ISLAND BECOMES THE LAST OF THE ORIGINAL US COLONIES TO RATIFY THE CONSTITUTION AND IS ADMITTED AS THE 13TH STATE.

How else can people from Connecticut get to Boston?

1848:  WISCONSIN IS ADMITTED AS THE 30TH STATE.

Do we have to take in all those Cheeseheads?

1852:  JENNY LIND LEFT NEW YORK AFTER HER WILDLY SUCCESSFUL TWO-YEAR AMERICAN TOUR.

The Justin Bieber of the 19th Century.

1861:  THE HONG KONG CHAMBER OF COMMERCE IS FOUNDED IN HONG KONG.

Clever how they came up with that name.

1886: CHEMIST JOHN PEMBERTON PLACES HIS FIRST AD FOR COCA COLA IN THE ATLANTA JOURNAL.

I'd like to teach the world to drink.

1903:  COMEDIAN BOB HOPE IS BORN.

But I wanna tell ya.  Keep reading for a very fun historical fact that I never knew until I started writing up this date.

1913:  IGOR STRAVINSKY'S BALLET "THE RITE OF SPRING" RECEIVES ITS PREMIERE PERFORMANCE IN PARIS, PROVOKING A RIOT.

What?  The tulips got upset??

1917:  PRESIDENT JOHN F. KENNEDY IS BORN.

And here it is, gang.  Who ever knew that Kennedy and Hope had the same    birthday?  And both of them slept with actresses named Marilyn.

1919:  ALBERT EINSTEIN'S THEORY OF GENERAL RELATIVITY IS CONFIRMED.  

I didn't even know it was Catholic.

1931:  MICHELE SCHIRRU, A US CITIZEN, IS EXECUTED BY AN ITALIAN MILITARY FIRING SQUAD FOR INTENT TO KILL MUSSOLINI.

Had she lived and married astronaut Wally Schirra, she would have been Michele Schirru Schirra.

1938:  FORMER BASEBALL COMMISSIONER FAY VINCENT IS BORN.

You think his folks wanted a girl?

1942:  ACTOR JOHN BARRYMORE DIES.

And a few of his actors cart his body to saloons all over Los Angeles.  A true story.

1942:  BING CROSBY RECORDS IRVING BERLIN'S SONG "WHITE CHRISTMAS."  

Great idea.  With it being May 29 and all.

1947:  ACTOR ANTHONY GEARY IS BORN.

He was on General Hospital longer than some people have been alive.

1951:  ACTRESS FANNY BRICE DIES.

Funny girl.  Even funnier face.

1953: EDMUND HILLARY AND SHERPA TENZING NORGAY BECOME THE FIRST PEOPLE TO REACH THE SUMMIT OF MOUNT EVEREST.

Something tells me Hillary made the sherpa go first.  Just to check the footing.

1955:  ASSASSIN JOHN HINCKLEY JR. IS BORN.

You talkin' to me?

1958:  ACTRESS ANNETTE BENING IS BORN.

The future Mrs. Warren Beatty.  

1972:  BASEBALL PLAYER/SPY MOE BERG DIES.

I like that occupation mix.  I wonder if that's what he wrote on his income tax returns.

1973:  TOM BRADLEY IS ELECTED THE FIRST BLACK MAYOR OF LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA.  

And I believe the last.

1979:  ACTRESS MARY PICKFORD DIES.

How are those curls working out for you now?

1988:  US PRESIDENT RONALD REAGAN BEGINS HIS FIRST VISIT TO THE SOVIET UNION WHEN HE ARRIVES FOR A SUMMIT WITH MIKHAIL GORBACHEV.

Mr. Gorbachev, your wall is toast.

1990:  THE RUSSIAN PARLIAMENT ELECTS BORIS YELTSIN PRESIDENT OF THE RUSSIAN SFSR.

I really wish Mrs. Yeltsin's first name was Natasha.

1997:  TV ANNOUNCER GEORGE FENNEMAN DIES.

You bet your death.

1998:  POLITICIAN BARRY GOLDWATER DIES.

Misunderstood.

2001:  THE US SUPREME COURT RULES THAT DISABLED GOLFER CASEY MARTIN CAN USE A CART TO RIDE IN TOURNAMENTS.

Good.  Otherwise, he's still on the first hole.

2004:  LAWYER ARCHIBALD COX DIES.

The only good lawyer is....well, you know.

2008:  ACTOR HARVEY KORMAN DIES.

I once lit his candle at a Christmas Eve church service.  

2010:  ACTOR DENNIS HOPPER DIES.

I never lit his candle.  Ever.

2015:  ACTRESS BETSY PALMER DIES.

Not a secret any more.

2015:  THE NEW ONE WORLD TRADE CENTER OPENS.

Take that, Wamsutta Heads!!

Dinner last night:  Leftover beef tri-tip.

Not The Bundy Guy That Was On "Married With Children"

While this movie opened in actual theaters for a week or so, it got most of its audience via Netflix.  And that's a good thing because I can't imagine somebody going up to the box office and asking for a ticket to this long title.

Indeed, the title itself comes from the sentencing that the Florida judge bestows upon mass murderer Ted Bundy and it makes sense.   This was one sick guy who, according to the closing credits, admitted to killing 30 women.  And they are worried about Harvey Weinstein?

Admittedly, I didn't really know much about this true story.  As a result, I found the film surprisingly interesting and...ahem...shockingly compelling.   As the story begins in 1969, young and handsome law student Ted Bundy strikes up a romance with Liz, a young and pretty single mom.  All progresses along like a sitcom.   But, suddenly, there are some girls missing in Seattle and Ted's ugly Volkswagen is spotted near a lake where the girls were last seen.

Slowly, Liz starts to suspect Ted as well, especially when he goes off to Utah and Colorado and there are women missing there, too.   Eventually, she kicks him to the curb.   Of course, he winds up in Florida and is finally caught for bludgeoning a couple of college co-eds there.
In a major twist which is apparently true, Ted winds up representing himself as his own counsel.  The court scenes are hilarious as he does battle trying to prove his innocence versus the presiding judge (John Malkovich!) and the district attorney (Jim Parsons!!!).  Meanwhile, Liz is watching all the action from afar as this is one of the first televised trials ever.   By now, she has taken up with a sympathetic co-worker played by....surprisingly....a quite chubby Haley Joel Osment.

At the heart of this on both the starring and producing side is....shockingly...Zac Efron, who gives quite a credible performance as Bundy.  You can see how well he captures the guy when they show the real person in footage at the end.   Zac Efron can act.  Who knew?

Obviously, this movie won't be everybody's cup of tea.   But if you choose to learn something about somebody you knew nothing about, give it a whirl.

LEN'S RATING:  Three stars.

Dinner last night:  Bacon wrapped Dodger Dog at the game.

Monday Morning Video Laugh - May 27, 2019

I am proud to say that I have not watched late night TV since Johnny retired.  And here's one hilarious reason why.

Dinner last night:  Tri-tip beef and mushrooms sauteed in butter and shallots.

The Sunday Memory Drawer - Every Memorial Day

I think of it every year at this time.

If you don't know how to properly fold an American flag for this Memorial Day weekend, the animated diagram above shows you how.
The good news is that I've known how since I was ten years old. Was I some sort of an Army brat?

Nope, I learned it all from Grandma.

In the house I grew up in on South 15th Avenue in Mount Vernon, New York, we had a big honking flag pole cemented right in the middle of the front yard. It actually stretched past our apartment on the second floor. It was as big as any you might find in front of the most important of Federal buildings. But it was all ours. Right there where my grandmother could easily see it from her first floor living room window.

More importantly, we used it on all the national holidays. Come Memorial Day or the Fourth of July or even Veteran's Day in November, I would hear the hallway closet downstairs creak open. I'd envision the boxes being moved this way or that. The smell of mothballs would waft up to the second floor.

Yep, Grandma was rooting around for the American flag again.

I'd walk around the neighborhood and not see a lot of the same patriotism on these holidays. Certainly, not an American flag being hoisted up a huge pole at the crack of dawn. But, that's what my grandparents did like clockwork.

After my grandfather died, I could no longer exist in mere passive curiosity.  My grandmother would not allow it.

"You gonna help me now."

Okay, Grandma. I figured it was only going to be a slight diversion to my day of play. Yet, I had no idea how seriously she took this ceremony. The way in which the flag was unfolded. How it was handled with the utmost of care.

And, at the end of the day, the precise folding of the banner. Military style. To the strictest of code. My first few attempts did not go well.

"No, no, no. Not that way. This way!"

The words had a sharp tone. Grandma meant business with this. And I was treating it all like Gomer Pyle, USMC.

After a while, I got it. And we responded on every holiday. Granted we weren't a bunch of Marines following the flag over President John F. Kennedy's casket. But Grandma and I got into a neat rhythm when it was time to put the flag away. We did it as flawlessly as we could. Moreover, we did it with the proper amount of respect.

Several years later, I asked my father about that tradition. What was I missing? What was behind the flag ceremony?

"Well, you do know that's the flag that covered your uncle's casket?"

A funeral held in the south of France where he was killed in the waning days of World War II. A ceremony that nobody in the family had attended. For my grandmother's son. The person I was ultimately named after.

No, Dad, I didn't know that.

In this recent picture of that house years after I left it, the flagpole stands as tall as ever.
Without the flag. Without me and Grandma standing at the base, momentarily watching it proudly flap in the gentle breeze.

Except for the memories, that flagpole stands. Simply and utterly just there.

Dinner last night:  Lots of party snacks at R10 Social House.

Classic Movie Trailer of the Month - May 2019

This was released with an X rating fifty years ago this month.   That didn't stop some kids.   

Dinner last night:  Leftover beef sausage and onions plus homemade macaroni salad.

Dead In Front of A Studio Audience

Boy, oh, boy, where do I start?

Unless you were on the planet Jupiter on Wednesday, you probably know that ABC ran a stunt special where they brought in new casts to enact special episodes of the vintage "All in the Family" and "The Jeffersons."  This was the brain (dead) child of original creator Norman Lear and his resident sycophant Jimmy Kimmel.   The goal was to show younger audiences about some of the history of great television.  And, oh, yeah.  To remind them that racism is still rampant in this country.

Trust me.  In the May sweeps month, they would have been much better off rebooting the old "Battle of the Network Stars."  Hmm, let's see if Willie Aames can still beat Scott Baio in a swimming relay.   

To say that the Kimmel/Lear production was a travesty is being kind.   This was a complete car wreck from initial impact.   After five minutes, I was surprised that air bags didn't pop out of my TV screen.

It all started with Norman and Jimmy seated in some movable box like they were the two old theater guys on the Muppets.   

They told us that what we would be seeing is epic.   Nothing like oversell.  But they then schooled us on the subject matter and that so many things first discussed in these shows nearly fifty years ago are still plaguing America today.  Frankly, the only thing plaguing America today are dumbbells like these two reminding us that we are being plagued in America today.

Don't get me wrong.   Norman Lear was a genius.  The operative word there is "was."  He's 97 years old today and should be content to enjoying his daily #17 sandwich at Langer's Deli.  Instead, he is picking off whatever meat is left on his own carcass.  As for Kimmel who apparently spearheaded the efforts to bring these classics to a new audience, he remains steadfastly his greatest fan.  I know people who have worked for him.   The only thing Jimmy Kimmel focuses on is Jimmy Kimmel.

So, they began with a 1973 episode of "AITF" and they picked an episode that showed off Archie Bunker's racism and bigotry to a T.   Whether you agreed with Archie or not, he was a character you grew to love.   But not the Archie in the episode they redid.   He came off as an out-and-out villain and true fans of the original version could see those shadings as provided by Carroll O'Connor.  When you are doing this with an agenda, Archie didn't have a chance despite the noble efforts of Woody Harrelson.

As for the rest of the cast, the acting was by and large atrocious.   Marisa Tomei gave Edith qualities that made it seem like she was mentally challenged.   I have no clue who the idiots were playing Mike and Gloria and I likely won't be seeing them again.  Sean Hayes pranced in as neighbor Frank Lorenzo and it's clear to me that Hayes can no longer essay a character outside of the persona he plays on "Will and Grace."  The only passable performer was Wanda Sykes who added a nice touch or two to her portrayal of Louise Jefferson.

And then there was Jamie Foxx as George Jefferson.   The moment he sashayed through the front door, I could see he was not acting.  He was simply channeling every tic and mannerism of the original George, Sherman Hemsley.  Apparently, Rich Little was not available. Foxx was so occupied with this that he forgot his lines, broke character, and exclaimed "hey, we're live."   Idiot.  Well, at least, none of these jokers were reading cue cards like the dopes on SNL.  But, still.

We moved onto the second episode and the script was the very first episode of "The Jeffersons" where Louise and George battle over hiring a maid.  Now we were joined by Will Ferrell and Kerry Washington as Tom and Helen Willis, along with the almost unrecognizable Jackee as their maid.  Again, Foxx' preening as George distracted the viewer from even remotely enjoying or tolerating the proceedings.  

As luck would have it, this episode did offer the first glimpse of Florence the Jeffersons' maid and we were lucky to have the original, Marla Gibbs, actually appear in the role.   I will give you one guess which actor did the best job of showing any semblance of wise acting choices.  Yep, the 88-year-old Marla.

Now I remember that the original episode has a wonderful closing line by Florence that brought down the house in 1975.  It was all about "overcoming."  It didn't get the same reaction in 2019, largely because a lot of the audience didn't have a clue that this was a reference to the 1960's slogan "We Shall Overcome."

And that was another problem with this entire affair.   The studio audience.  They screamed and clapped and cheered way too much.   Every character's entrance and exit was greeted with wild histrionics.   Come on, folks.  You want to do that kind of whooping and hollering?   Go get tickets for Ellen or those clowns with "The View."   Another major distraction amongst many others.

And here's where we talk about some additional blood on ABC's hands.  In both episodes, the ubiquitous "N Word" was used in the context of the script.  Every time it was used, the network bleeped it.

Shameful.   Especially since the original episodes air on cable networks and streaming services with every word intact.   I know this for a fact.  I have seen it.   It was one more grievance on my list, but, at this point, I was running out of ink.

This all had the smell of community theater where your local grocer gets the lead.   The set direction was dead on and perfect, but nobody listens to the decor.   The over emoting from all the actors can be placed at the doorstep of James Burrows, the overrated Hollywood go-to sitcom director.  Burrows is quietly well known for being lazy and letting actors run amok.   That's exactly what they did here.   I mean, when the highlight is Jennifer Hudson singing "Movin' On Up" as she walks through the Jefferson apartment, you know the bottom of the barrel is approaching.

All in all, this entire evening was better off being unseen.   But what the heck do I know?   The Nielsen numbers soared off the chart.  So expect the wise and all knowing Lear and Kimmel to do this during every sweeps month.   Expect to see reincarnations of "Good Times," "Maude," and maybe even "Diff'rent Strokes."   The studio audience will scream in delight.   Norman and Jimmy will educate us on how important this all is.   

And I will be watching the originals on another channel.

Dinner last night:  Beef sausage and onions.

Twelve Years Later....

Deja vu all over again.   I wrote the following on November 18, 2008.

I heartily recommend to you "The Big Bang Theory."

Okay, it's not perfect. But it is a sitcom shot with four cameras in front of a live audience that is truly and heartily laughing like I used to hear on "Everybody Loves Raymond." The dialogue is smart, the casting is impeccable, and it brings you some characters you have never seen before on TV.

I watched from its premiere last season and the early episodes were bumpy as the writers searched long and hard for the character voices. But, now, everybody has their chops down and this show is humming. The true proof of the pudding is that American Airlines is now airing episodes and the laughter around the cabin is deafening.

"The Big Bang Theory" brings some new folks to television. Leonard and Sheldon are two mensa geniuses working in some scientific think tank. Their friends are also hyper-intelligent: one of them is a kid from India whose parents communicate with him from New Delhi via Webex. They are all geeks and weird and the type of people you find at comic book stores and sci-fi conventions. 

In one episode, the four of them dug down into a game of Klingon Bobble. It made no sense. It was hilarious. The protagonist in all this is their next door neighbor Penny, who is hundred times less smart and works as a waitress at the Cheesecake Factory. In a way, this becomes a family comedy. An unrelated, terribly strange family, but a family nonetheless.

As Leonard and Sheldon, Johnny Galecki and Jim Parsons channel younger versions of Frasier and Niles on steroids. More specifically, Parsons (pictured) is just about set to run away with this show. His delivery and timing is so spot-on that the writers are now gravitating toward him. He gets more and more of the plots and could be to this series what David Hyde Pierce was to "Frasier" and Michael J. Fox was to "Family Ties." This sometimes is not a good thing. You never want one character to upset the complete balance of the series. My fear is that this might happen in Season 3 or 4. But, until then, Parsons is gold and should also win some at the next Emmy Awards ceremony.

More importantly, "The Big Bang Theory" raises Lazarus from the dead. It brings back to our living rooms a traditional situation comedy that is really not as high concept as is written on the page. At the end of the day or the episode, it's funny. And that's all I want.

Twelve years later, "The Big Bang Theory" ends its run and I am so proud that I was so right.  I was happy to be the one to alert friends back in the day when ratings were low.   Now as it aired its final episode in May, 2019, we salute the work of all involved.   

Now I must confess that, while I always stuck with it, I did grow just a wee bit tired of it over the last three seasons.   It was clear that they were running out of plots.   Jim Parsons started to overplay the quirks of his character which happens when an actor gets bored.  And, during the last two years, they handed too, too much screen time to the character pf Koothrappali, who was played by arguably the weakest actor in the cast.  Yet, at the same time over the course of the series, Kaley Cuoco grew leaps and bounds as an actress and is a future comedic force to be reckoned with. 

That said, I probably didn't miss an episode and there was always one genuine big laugh for me every week.   I cannot say that about any other sitcom on TV these days.  Moreover, the universality of the characters will last for generations because, thanks to the genuine laughter from the studio audience, it will invite multiple viewings.   

You can't say that about junk like "black-ish" and "Fresh Off The Boat."  Take that, Constance Wu, you ungrateful pig.

Yep, "The Big Bang Theory" lasted because it was funny. It was the perfect blend of writing and casting that happens so rarely in television.  Kudos and thanks for all the fun.

Dinner last night:  Broccoli salad.

This Date in History - May 22

Happy birthday, Barbara Parkins.  Talk about the first women to jumpstart your hormones.  Here's one who did that for me.

334 BC:  THE MACEDONIAN ARMY OF ALEXANDER THE GREAT DEFEATS DARIUS III OF PERSIA.

There were three Darius' in Persia.  There were only two on Bewitched.

853:  A BYZANTINE FLEET SACKS AND DESTROYS UNDEFENDED DAMIETTA IN EGYPT.

Undefended?  The first ever incidence of bullying recorded in history.

1176:  THE HASHSHASHIN ATTEMPT TO MURDER SALADIN NEAR ALEPPO.

The Hashshashin should get addicted on hashish.  Then say that five times fast.

1200:  KING JOHN OF ENGLAND AND KING PHILIP II OF FRANCE SIGN THE TREATY OF LE GOULET.

Did Carol Lawrence know about this?

1377:  POPE GREGORY XI ISSUES FIVE PAPAL BULLS TO DENOUNCE THE DOCTRINES OF THEOLOGIAN JOHN WYCLIFFE.

And that's no.....okay, you finish the line.

1762:  SWEDEN AND PRUSSIA SIGN THE TREATY OF HAMBURG.

With onions and relish.

1802:  FIRST LADY MARTHA WASHINGTON DIES.

She and hubby shared wigs and doubled their wardrobe.

1807:  A GRAND JURY INDICTS FORMER VICE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES AARON BURR ON A CHARGE OF TREASON.

Which is why you don't see Aaron Burr's photo on any currency.

1816:  A MOB IN CAMBRIDGESHIRE, ENGLAND, RIOTS OVER HIGH UNEMPLOYMENT.

And this is new how?

1826:  HMS BEAGLE DEPARTS ON ITS FIRST VOYAGE.

My favorite breed of dog.  Just saying.

1849:  POLITICIAN LOUIS PERRIER IS BORN.

Insert your favorite sparkling water joke here.

1859:  AUTHOR SIR ARTHUR CONAN DOYLE IS BORN.

I have read every single Sherlock Holmes book he wrote.  Just saying.

1863:  DURING THE AMERICAN CIVIL WAR, UNION FORCES LAY SIEGE TO THE CONFEDERATE-CONTROLLED PORT HUDSON, LOUISIANA.

For a war that lasted only four years, there sure were a lot of important battle places.

1885:  AUTHOR VICTOR HUGO DIES.

The guy who wrote about the seedy part of France.  Oh, wait, all of France is seedy.

1906:  THE WRIGHT BROTHERS ARE GRANTED A US PATENT FOR THEIR FLYING MACHINE.

Those magnificent men.

1907:  SIR LAURENCE OLIVIER IS BORN.

He was married to Vivien Leigh.  No dummy was he.

1910:  TV ANNOUNCER JOHNNY OLSON IS BORN.

Come on down!

1922:  TV PRODUCER QUINN MARTIN IS BORN.

A Mother Martin Production.

1924:  SINGER CHARLES AZNAVOUR IS BORN.

And he's still alive so I guess it's true what they say about drinking lots of wine.

1926:  CHIANG KAI-SHEK REPLACES COMMUNISTS IN KUOMINTANG CHINA.

Replaced them with what?

1927"  ACTOR MICHAEL CONSTANTINE IS BORN.

Room 222!

1930:  POLITICIAN HARVEY MILK IS BORN.

His expiration date was 1978.

1938:  ACTOR RICHARD BENJAMIN IS BORN.

One of those celebrities that I constantly see all over town.  

1939:  GERMANY AND ITALY SIGN THE PACT OF STEEL.

Unholy alliance indeed.

1942:  ACTRESS BARBARA PARKINS IS BORN.

What time does the bus leave for Peyton Place?

1942:  MEXICO ENTERS WORLD WAR II ON THE SIDE OF THE ALLIES.

I didn't know that leaf blowers were considered weapons.

1942:  TED WILLIAMS OF THE BOSTON RED SOX ENLISTS IN THE US MARINES.

I can't wait for that intra-barracks softball game.

1943:  BASEBALL PLAYER TOMMY JOHN IS BORN.

And yet he's better known for having surgery.

1947:  US PRESIDENT HARRY TRUMAN SIGNS AN ANTI-COMMUNISM ACT INTO LAW THAT WILL LATER BE CALLED THE TRUMAN DOCTRINE.

And what else would you have called that doctrine??

1960:  AN EARTHQUAKE MEASURING 9.5 HITS SOUTHERN CHILE.  IT IS THE MOST POWERFUL EARTHQUAKE EVER RECORDED.

Chile?  Total property damage:  $4,57.

1961:  ACTRESS JOAN DAVIS DIES.

I Buried Joan.

1964:  US PRESIDENT LYNDON JOHNSON ANNOUNCES THE GOALS OF HIS GREAT SOCIETY TO BRING AN END TO POVERTY AND RACIAL INJUSTICE IN AMERICA.

A society that has yet to get past the level of mediocre.

1969:  APOLLO 10'S LUNAR MODULE FLIES WITHIN 8.4 MILES OF THE MOON'S SURFACE.

Close, but not yet a giant step for mankind.

1972:  ACTRESS MARGARET RUTHERFORD DIES.

Solve this, Miss Marple.

1975:  BASEBALL PLAYER LEFTY GROVE DIES.

I don't have a single funny thing to say about that.

1980:  PAC-MAN VIDEO GAME IS RELEASED.

And there goes the attention span of millions of children,.

1990:  MICROSOFT RELEASES WINDOWS 3.0.

And what number are we up to now?

1990:  BOXER ROCKY GRAZIANO DIES.

Now he'll get to meet the somebody up there that likes him.

1992:  AFTER 30 YEARS, JOHNNY CARSON HOSTS THE TONIGHT SHOW FOR THE LAST TIME.

One of the sadder days of my life.

1998:  ACTOR JOHN DEREK DIES.

A line forms for those making condolence calls to the widow.

1998:  A FEDERAL JUDGE RULES THAT US SECRET SERVICE AGENTS CAN BE COMPELLED TO TESTIFY BEFORE A GRAND JURY CONCERNING THE MONICA LEWINSKY SCANDAL.

Was this big news at one time?

2001:  ACTOR WHITMAN MAYO DIES.

Held.

2002:  IN WASHINGTON DC, THE REMAINS OF THE MISSING CHANDRA LEVY ARE FOUND.

Which means she's no longer missing.

2003:  IN FORT WORTH, TEXAS, ANNIKA SORENSTAM BECOMES THE FIRST WOMAN TO PLAY THE PGA TOUR IN 58 YEARS.

I thought that was Dinah Shore.

2017:  22 PEOPLE ARE KILLED AT AN ARIANA GRANDE CONCERT IN MANCHESTER, ENGLAND.

Stubhub didn't warn us about this.

2017:  US PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP VISITS THE CHURCH OF THE HOLY SEPULCHRE IN JERUSALEM AND BECOMES THE FIRST SITTING PRESIDENT TO VISIT THE WESTERN WALL.

Although there were a few who did it while standing.

Dinner last night:  Leftover barbecued chicken.

Heaven Got A Little Funnier

Yikes.  We have fallen into that part of life where folks we have enjoyed in show business as full-grown adults are starting to pass on.   A day after Doris Day left us, we lose the comic genius of Tim Conway.   

Okay, he was in his 80s and didn't get cheated.  Plus he supposedly served from dementia so his death is probably a blessing.   

Truth be told, I never watched him on "McHale's Navy" and I certainly didn't see any of those Disney flicks he made with Don Knotts.

But "The Carol Burnett Show?"   My Lord, they should teach Tim Conway's work there in every college acting class there is.   Sheer genius.   

I hear that the Burnett troop did two performances of every episode.   One was the dress rehearsal and Tim followed the script to the letter.  But, for the air show, all bets were off.  He veered off the page and literally dared the rest of the cast to follow him.  The end result was the kind of spontaneous entertainment you never ever get on television these days.   

Check out this famed "outtake."   Watch Carol try to keep it together as Conway continues with his "elephant story."


Naturally, no mention of Conway in this forum is complete without the famed "Dentist" sketch.   Marvel at how quickly Harvey Korman loses it.   You just know that 75% of this was conceived on the spot.


Yep, all the nice things we have don't last forever.  But we should not lament that we don't have them anymore.  Instead, we smile because we had them at all.

Dinner last night:  Leftover barbecue Chinese pork.

Monday Morning Video Laugh - May 20, 2019

How to amuse a reporter....

Dinner last night: Barbecued chicken thighs, marinated cucumbers, and caramelized onions.

The Sunday Memory Drawer - Doris Day

I don't know if you are entitled to be sad when you hear that somebody has passed away at the age of 97.  But my emotions got a little jolt when news broke of the passing last week of Doris Day.  Despite the fact that she had chosen not to perform years ago, the world is still going to miss her.

Most people in the younger generation next to mine don't even know who she was.  But, if you watch Turner Classic Movies, you do.   Doris Day was the Hollywood version of a baseball "five-tool" player.   She could do comedy.  She could do drama.  She could sing.  She could dance.  And, back in the late 50s and early 60s, she was the biggest box office star of them all.  Take that, you Marvel Comics droids.   

Luckily, my parents instilled in me a perspective for history, whether it be American, Hollywood, or baseball.  So I knew who Doris Day was at a very early age.  I watched her TV sitcom with my grandmother.  I saw her movies on TV with my mother.  I even found my dad chuckling at one of the films at the Elmsford Drive-In.  

As I look back at that body of work, I see how reflective it was of a very simpler time.   This was an actress who virtually invented what we know today as a "rom com."   But not the leering, double entendre, borderline dirty kind.   Nope, this was America as we would have liked to live it.  Where girl meets boy and boy loses girl and there is ultimately a happy ending for all.

So, naturally, on the day that Doris died, I ambled over to my DVD collection and cranked up the Blu Ray for a showing of one of my truly favorite movies of all time.

The ultimate "rom com."

Some movies are clearly a product of their era. There is no film that is more keenly a reflection of the quiet and demure Fifties than "Pillow Talk" from 1959.

This is an absolutely delectable 90 minutes of sheer ridiculousness. And it gets more and more silly each time I see it. At the same time, when I finally saw it on a big screen a decade ago (after multiple TV viewings) at the Alex Theater in Pasadena, the place was packed. And nobody caught stop laughing.

Where else but in the world of Doris Day and Rock Hudson could a 30 plus year-old career woman be still saving herself for the right guy? The hell with Steve Carell and his 40 year-old virgin nonsense. Doris takes the honors for keeping the store closed as long as she did. With style, elegance, and fashions that only producer Ross Hunter could find out of the Universal Studios wardrobe department.

Thanks to today's technology, the story is incredibly dated. A case of mistaken identities as a result of two people sharing a party line. When I saw it with a live audience, I actually heard a father explain that whole concept to a rather confused teenager. I guess if this were remade today, Doris and Rock would be slugging it out on My Space. But, indeed, regardless of the now virtually ancient plot line, any remake could never come close to the sheer brilliance of this script, which won an Oscar for screenplay. The dialogue crackles as the actor have fun with a plot that they must know deep down is ludicrous.

In retrospect, it's hilarious to watch "Pillow Talk" now that we are all fully aware of Rock Hudson' sexual orientation. Because, for a good deal of the movie, he pretends to be a man who is very fond of sharing recipes, etc.---you know "the sensitive kind." Wink, wink. Nobody in the movie going audience knew it then, but I am sure everybody in the cast and crew got their jollies as Rock sunk his teeth into those scenes, which are utterly inane and believable at the same time.

Amidst the all important supporting players, Tony Randall lays the groundwork with seeds that will eventually sprout to his portrayal of Felix Unger eleven years later. And no one does "drunk housekeeper" better than Thelma Ritter. I wish my cleaning lady would show up bombed once in a while just so I can have the same razor sharp repartee Thelma shares with Doris.
All throughout the movie, the pastel colors prevail. The wardrobe is luscious. And, above all, there is laughter.

Not bad for a world that really doesn't exist.

But should.

And it will be a world sadly that must go on now without the likes of Doris Day.  Thank goodness for my DVD collection.

Dinner last night:  BBQ pork from Moon House.