Thursday, November 30, 2017

Almost a Century Of Entertainment

If you are a regular reader here, you will remember that I was thoroughly disappointed several weeks ago with a viewing of a new documentary called "78/52."   It was supposed to be a study of the famous shower scene from "Psycho" but it brought nothing new to my table and was excruciatingly dull to boot.

So I was a little documentary-gun-shy.  And then I happened upon "Wait for Your Laugh" and complete faith in the genre was restored.   This film is a guaranteed smile-a-minute.  As a matter of fact, I'm still grinning days later.

But then again, the film makers here had a lot to work with as the subject matter is the famous Rose Marie.   94 years young and still looking for lunch, despite being hooked up to an oxygen tank and bound to a wheelchair.   So, what?   She can still put the right inflection on a comedy line better than anybody else working today.

Now, unlike the "78/52" waste of time, I learned something new from this film.  Sure, I remembered Rose Marie from the revered "Dick Van Dyke Show" and the old "Hollywood Squares." And I sort of knew that she was a child singer back in the 30s.   But I had no clue how big a star she was then.   I had no idea that her father was in the mob and she used to call Al Capone her uncle.   Or that, as Las Vegas was coming up for the first time out of the desert, that gangster Bugsy Siegel helped along her career.   

I did not know just how strong her marriage was and that he died at a very young age.   I didn't really know the significance of the famous black bow she wears in her hair.   Ironically, that news is revealed in this film not by Rose Marie, but by Squares host Peter Marshall.

I had no clue there were so many home movies in color of the Van Dyke cast rehearsing their classic sitcom.  I was totally unaware of one fact after another as this 90 minute visit with Rose Marie held me spellbound.  Laughing and crying and almost always smiling.

I was learning stuff and that is the mark of a great documentary.   "Wait for Your Laugh" certainly is that and kudos go to the film maker Jason Wise as well as Rose Marie's only daughter who is one of the producers.

I was even more blessed to see this film with a question-and-answer session following it.   That forum included Tom Bergeron, the aforementioned Peter Marshall, and Rose Marie herself.   So what if the questions had to be repeated because she couldn't hear them the first time?   The glory was getting to hear the answers in person.   

Indeed, the crowd in the packed screening was likely 75% Hollywood history. Oh, there's the old producer from the "Hollywood Squares."  Hey, there's Larry Matthews who played the kid on the Van Dyke show.   Oh, look, it's Bruce Vilanch.  Hey, there's George Chakiris.

It sort of felt like a memorial service.   But, the good news is that the main topic was up there on the screen and then in person right before us.  And, after almost a century of entertaining us, Rose Marie is still around to make us smile.

If you're a fan or even if you're not, this is one documentary not to be missed.

LEN'S RATING:  Four stars.

Dinner last night:  Turkey sandwich.

Wednesday, November 29, 2017

This Date in History - November 29

Happy 90th birthday to our old and cherished friend Vin Scully.   This past baseball season missed you.

800:  CHARLEMAGNE ARRIVES AT ROME TO INVESTIGATE THE CRIMES IMPUTED TO POPE LEO III.

CSI:Vatican.

1549:  THE PAPAL CONCLAVE OF 1549-50 BEGINS.

That is one long meeting.

1729:  NATCHEZ INDIANS MASSACRE 138 FRENCHMEN, 35 FRENCH WOMEN, AND 56 CHILDREN NEAR MODERN-DAY NATCHEZ, MISSISSIPPI.

35 French women for 138 Frenchmen and only 56 children?

1781:  THE CREW OF THE BRITISH SLAVE SHIP ZONG MURDERS 133 AFRICANS BY DUMPING THEM INTO THE SEA TO CLAIM INSURANCE.

And, no, Rachel Maddow, Trump was not the captain.

1783:  A 5.3 MAGNITUDE EARTHQUAKE STRIKES NEW JERSEY.

Except nobody lived there to feel it.

1847:  MISSIONARIES DR. MARCUS WHITMAN, HIS WIFE, AND 15 OTHERS ARE KILLED BY INDIANS, CAUSING THE CAYUSE WAR.

Talk about your Whitman Sampler.

1877:  THOMAS EDISON DEMONSTRATES HIS PHONOGRAPH FOR THE FIRST TIME.

Playing at 2 RPM.

1890:  THE MEIJI CONSTITUTION GOES INTO EFFECT IN JAPAN AND THE FIRST DIET CONVENES.  

Drink at least 8 glasses of water a day.

1902:  THE PITTSBURGH STARS DEFEATED THE PHILADELPHIA ATHLETICS, 11-0, AT THE PITTSBURGH COLISEUM, TO WIN THE FIRST CHAMPIONSHIP ASSOCIATED WITH AN AMERICAN NATIONAL PROFESSIONAL FOOTBALL GAME.

Yay!  I had Philadelphia with 12 points.

1927:  DODGER BROADCASTER VIN SCULLY IS BORN.

National holiday petition, please!

1929:  US ADMIRAL RICHARD BYRD LEADS THE FIRST EXPEDITION TO FLY OVER THE SOUTH POLE.

As the Byrd flies...

1944:  WORLD WAR II - ALBANIA IS LIBERATED BY THE PARTISANS.

The Partisans, but which side?

1947:  FIRST INDOCHINA WAR - FRENCH FORCES CARRY OUT A MASSACRE AT MY TRACH, VIETNAM.

My Trach is Your Trach.

1949:  COMIC GARRY SHANDLING IS BORN.

And we lost him too soon.

1952:  KOREAN WAR - US PRESIDENT-ELECT DWIGHT EISENHOWER FULFILLS A CAMPAIGN PROMISE BY TRAVELING TO KOREA TO FIND OUT WHAT CAN BE DONE TO END THE CONFLICT.

Well, you can tell them to stop shooting for one.

1955:  COMIC HOWIE MANDEL IS BORN.

Celebrate by putting a rubber glove over your head.

1963: US PRESIDENT LYNDON JOHNSON ESTABLISHES THE WARREN COMMISSION TO INVESTIGATE THE ASSASSINATION OF PRESIDENT JOHN F. KENNEDY.

Just make sure you say Oswald worked alone, wink, wink.

1967:  VIETNAM WAR - US SECRETARY OF DEFENSE ROBERT MCNAMARA ANNOUNCES HIS RESIGNATION.

He got out just as we were really starting to lose big.

1969:  YANKEE CLOSER MARIANO RIVERA IS BORN.

Too late to watch the Mets win the World Series.

1972:  ATARI ANNOUNCES THE RELEASE OF PONG, THE FIRST COMMERCIALLY SUCCESSFUL VIDEO GAME.

Ping, Pong.

1981:  ACTRESS NATALIE WOOD DIES.

Or "is murdered" depending upon your viewpoint.

1986:  ACTOR CARY GRANT DIES.

The Corpse and the Bobby Soxer.

1887:  KOREAN AIR FLIGHT 858 EXPLODES OVER THE THAI-BURMESE BORDER, KILLING 115.

So, play the number 858115 in today's lotto.

1999:  TV HOST GENE RAYBURN DIES.

"Gene doesn't look so good today.   That's because he's________."

2001:  BEATLE GEORGE HARRISON DIES.

Our Sweet Lord.

2009:  MAURICE CLEMMONS SHOOTS AND KILLS FOUR POLICE OFFICERS INSIDE A COFFEE SHOP IN WASHINGTON.   

That's a waste of four good donuts.

2016:  MTM FOUNDER GRANT TINKER DIES.

Saw him multiple times here.   In a car wash and a restaurant twice.

Dinner last night:  Leftover BBQ pulled pork.

Tuesday, November 28, 2017

And This Week's Pointless Remake Is....

I mean, there is one every week, right?

Can you think of anything more preposterous than a remake of a well known Agatha Christie mystery film where you already know the identity of whodunit?  Except for exhibiting some new style and the almost requisite recasting for terms of diversity, the 2017 edition is exactly the same as the 1974 movie.   Let's face it.   This is one production which could put the words "spoiler alert" out of business.

This time, famed detective Hercule Poirot is played by Albert Finney...um, I mean Kenneth Branagh.   The murdered businessman is essayed by Richard Widmark...um, I mean Johnny Depp.   Some of the suspects are played by Wendy Hiller, Anthony Perkins, Sean Connery, Lauren Bacall, Ingrid Bergman, and Jacqueline Bisset.   No, wait, I meant Judi Dench, Josh Gad, Leslie Odom Jr, Michelle Pfeiffer, Olivia Colman, and Lucy Boynton.   Yeah, I know.   I never heard of the last two either.

An avalanche again traps the train and this one in 2017 probably features a lot more CGI than the earlier one where they likely used real snow.  It is up to Poirot to figure it all out and, of course, you knew the answer forty-three years ago.

Meanwhile, this is a complete vanity project for Kenneth Branagh, who stars, directs, and bakes donuts for the crew.   He even did the lyrics for the closing song over the credits which is sung...um, badly...by Michelle Pfeiffer.   I am guessing nobody had a piano for her to sit on.

To make things worse, the closing scene suggests that Poirot is headed for a cruise on the Nile.   So, what's more ridiculous than remaking a classic?   It's remaking the entire movie franchise that came out of that classic.  I guess the last original idea in Hollywood came from Harvey Weinstein and look what happened to him.

Yep, you are much better off waiting for the original to show up on TCM.   Even if you do know already who did it.

LEN'S RATING:  One-and-a-half stars.

Dinner last night:  BBQ pulled pork.

Monday, November 27, 2017

Monday Morning Video Laugh - November 27, 2017

Black Friday this year was likely no different than last year.

Dinner last night:  Thanksgiving leftovers.

Sunday, November 26, 2017

The Sunday Memory Drawer - Long Before Harvey Weinstein and Kevin Spacey

...and Charlie Rose and Russell Simmons and Louis CK and that guy who runs Pixar.

The list goes on and on and it will get longer.  Fearless prediction from moi: eventually we will add a certain actor from my hometown to this roster of sexual predators.  I know way too much about the guy for him not to get charged with groping and more.  Unless, of course, he hasn't paid off his past victims ahead of time.

But I digress.  The news has been ugly from both Hollywood and Washington DC as if this behavior is new.   Spoiler alert: it's not.  

Of course, in my own little world down here on the E list of show business, you're very conscious of this stuff.  Hey, you need to be very careful and that shouldn't be as hard as some people are finding it.

Case in point.   When we were putting together a cast for our current project, we targeted a particular actress for the lead.  I knew her work and thought she really had the right sensibility for what we were trying to achieve.  Because we were developing "out of the box," we were not dealing with those wonderful wall builders called agents and managers.  So we decided to approach her on Facebook.

But I was very sensitive that it would look creepy for me...a guy...to troll after her on social media.   So I had our associate producer...a gal...make the initial approach.   And when our actress said "yes, we should meet over lunch," I made sure the same associate producer come to the meal.   I was that concerned about the actress' sensitivity.   

So I was overly cautious and wanted to be totally upstanding.   Hey, you guys mentioned at the top, how hard is that to respect somebody?

Oddly enough, amidst all the dirty stuff that's been coming out the past month, I am actually laughing.   Oh, not at the despicable nature of it all.   That's not a ha ha matter.   Nope, I am thinking about how I saw this all before.  

If you wanted to be really appalled by sexual shenanigans and the like, all you need to do was follow me in one of my first jobs.   As an audience researcher about 30 years at Westwood One Radio Networks.  Oh, they're still in business but a very different company now.   It would have to be.   Because, back in that day, Westwood One...and the network radio industry in total...made Harvey Weinstein look like Mister Rogers.  And it was a publicly traded company, to boot.  Amazing.

Back then, WWO (as we used to abbreviate it) specialized in national radio programming from the rock and roll world.   We produced concert tours of the hottest of the hot.  It was a happening place.  You name the rock star.  We probably had them under contract.

The management team was full of young hot shots who would be called hipsters in today's jargon.  And, as I think about what this lowly kid saw play out in front of him, I could write a book...or several blogs.

At one point, my cubicle was close to the reception desk.   If that person was away, I frequently signed for packages from messengers.   They were all "soft" envelopes.  After three or four signatures, I knew I was unwittingly enabling the transport of cocaine for some of our advertising clients.   Hell, I saw somebody open one in front and the white powder was certainly not Coffee Mate.

That was the drugs in the rock and roll world and yes, there was also plenty of sex.  Some of the sales managers acted like frat boys with rulers.   A lot of the women on staff were obvious targets.   Most fought off the advances.   Some did not.

There was one girl in my department who gave it away freely.   After two whiskey sours, she could be yours.   And I watched this soap opera play out time after time.   At one sales managers meeting in New York, she got so drunk that the powers that be took turns carrying her drunken skeleton from one room to another.  

Charming.

At a sales meeting in Los Angeles, I caught her at the cocktail lounge necking with one of the sales guys.   I started to walk away but she called me back.   She was desperate for me to interrupt them.  When the guy was out of ear shot, she whispered in my ear.

"Please stick around.  He's acting like I'm his exclusive date for the meeting and I would really like to be with XXX."

All of a sudden, I was the heroine's best friend in an X-rated Archie and Veronica comic book.

Now when the head of sales took up with her, there was reason for her to get his approval on some audience data once a month.  She'd go to his office, the door would close, and we would not see either of them for three hours.

After she left the company shortly thereafter, we assigned the audience approval task to a young guy right out of college.   He'd return with the necessary sign off ten minutes later.

Now, a few weeks later, my boss was in the process of hiring a new assistant.  When the head of sales saw her in the reception area waiting to be interviewed, he hightailed it down to my boss' office.

"That's the one you need to hire."

Forget about whether she was qualified.   It was clear we needed to hire her. PS, they had an affair for the next two years.

And the hits just keep on coming.

A new female sales person lasted a grand total of two weeks.   After sitting in on a sales meeting where one of the managers announced that a certain idea "didn't get him stiff," she resigned.

At another sales managers' meeting, a prostitute was engaged to accost one of our unsuspecting supervisors who was walking behind the group a block away.  She was offered 100 dollars for the initial contact and promised 500 bucks if she closed the deal.

Hmmm.   There was another time where, around 11PM on a Friday, two employees were chasing each other around the reception area naked.   It wouldn't have been so bad if the building guard hadn't spotted them on his surveillance camera.

I could go on and on and the ugliness gets more pronounced.  Oddly, I talk to old friends who worked at competitive radio networks at the time.   The same stuff was going on there, too.   

Obviously, the culprits are not just men, but women as well.   The girl in my department, for instance, didn't put up too much resistance.   In fact, she'd probably sleep with a Swifter mop if it could buy her a bourbon sour.  But, as an aggregate, it set up a nasty culture that I still, to this day, remember.

So, guess what?   The Hollywood and Washington nonsense is not all that new.  It's just that folks are finally recognizing it for what it is.

Dinner last night:  Arclight salad.

Saturday, November 25, 2017

Classic Movie Trailer of the Month - November 2017

Released fifty years ago this month...

Dinner last night:  Tomato soup.

Friday, November 24, 2017

Your Holiday Shopping Guide for 2017

You don't really want to be out with these people this holiday shopping season.  On this day, one of the biggest shopping days of the year, let me help.   Here are some nifty gift ideas that you can easily find on-line.   Less wear and tear on your body.   
 For the NRA member of your family...
 No need to get beer suds on your facial hair with this wonderful gadget.
 Actually, it's where the liquid is going anyway....
 Like I said...
 For the laziest Italian on your list...
A cute knick knack for anybody who actually remembers what a Polaroid camera is.
The 2017 Nativity scene.   With Three Wise Men bearing gifts via Amazon Prime and a shepherd posting it all on Instagram.
 Let your cat be the one guilty of collusion.
 Just how bored can you get in the bathroom?
 For the toddler destined to be a pole dancer.
 Stocking/garbage can stuffer.
Seriously?

Dinner last night:  Turkey roulade with stuffing, scalloped potatoes, cranberry sauce, Brussels sprouts and carrots.

Thursday, November 23, 2017

The Traditional Thanksgiving Day Entry

What else?   Another rendition of "Turkey Lurkey Time" from the Broadway musical "Promises Promises."

Enjoy the video and your meal.

Dinner last night:  Burger and fries.

Wednesday, November 22, 2017

This Date in History - November 22

Finally!   After all these historical Wednesdays, we at last hit the date that changed America forever.   Let's see what else happened on this fateful day.

498:  AFTER THE DEATH OF ANASTASIUS II, SYMMACHUS IS ELECTED POPE IN THE LATERAN PALACE, WHILE LAURENTIUS IS ELECTED POPE IN SANTA MARIA MAGGIORE.

Hey, Pope, you can't say that Santa Maria Maggiore hasn't been nice to you today.

1307:  POPE CLEMENT V ISSUES THE PAPAL BULL PASTORALIS PRAEEMINENTIAE WHICH INSTRUCTED ALL CHRISTIAN MONARCHS IN EUROPE TO ARREST ALL TEMPLARS AND SEIZE THEIR ASSETS.

You mean Simon Templar?

1574:  SPANISH NAVIGATOR JUAN FERNANDEZ DISCOVERS ISLANDS NOW KNOWN AS THE JUAN FERNANDEZ ISLANDS OFF CHILE.

Now that's clever marketing.

1718:  OFF THE COAST OF NORTH CAROLINA, BRITISH PIRATE "BLACKBEARD" IS KILLED IN BATTLE.

"Mrs. Blackbeard jumped up and cried 'oh, no.'  The pirate ship sailed on."

1837:  CANADIAN JOURNALIST AND POLITICIAN WILLIAM LYON MACKENZIE CALLS FOR A REBELLION AGAINST THE UNITED KINGDOM IN HIS ESSAY "TO THE PEOPLE OF UPPER CANADA."

And my mother used to say Canada was "Upper US."

1869:  IN SCOTLAND, THE CLIPPER CUTTY SARK IS LAUNCHED, ONE OF THE LAST CLIPPERS EVER BUILT.

A big deal apparently because it got its own liquor bottle.

1899:  PIANIST HOAGY CARMICHAEL IS BORN.

No, he did not invent the sandwich.

1902:  PHYSICIAN WALTER REED DIES.

Not in need of his own hospital now.

1921:  COMIC RODNEY DANGERFIELD IS BORN.

Gee, his 42nd birthday sucked.

1924:  ACTRESS GERALDINE PAGE IS BORN.

Gee, her 39th birthday sucked.

1928:  THE PREMIER PERFORMANCE OF RAVEL'S BOLERO TAKES PLACE IN PARIS.

How raveling.

1935:  THE CHINA CLIPPER INAUGURATES THE FIRST COMMERCIAL TRANSPACIFIC AIR SERVICE, CONNECTING CALIFORNIA WITH MANILA.

But it's no Cutty Sark.

1940:  ACTOR TERRY GILLIAM IS BORN.

Gee, his 23rd birthday...oh, you get the point.

1942:  WORLD WAR II - GENERAL FRIEDRICH PAULUS SENDS ADOLF HITLER A TELEGRAM SAYING THAT THE GERMAN 6TH ARMY IS SURROUNDED.

That took a lot of chutzpah.

1943:  WORLD WAR II - US PRESIDENT ROOSEVELT, BRITISH PRIME MINISTER CHURCHILL AND CHINESE PREMIERE CHIANG KAI-SHEK MEET IN CAIRO TO DISCUSS WAYS TO DEFEAT JAPAN.

Hope somebody had a handicapped parking spot.

1943:  TENNIS STAR BILLIE JEAN KING IS BORN.

Big deal, she beat up a guy.  Not the first and not the last.

1954:  THE HUMANE SOCIETY OF THE UNITED STATES IS FOUNDED.

No animals were harmed in the founding of this society.

1955:  ACTOR SHEMP HOWARD DIES.

The second greatest man to die on this date.

1958:  ACTRESS JAMIE LEE CURTIS IS BORN.

So you know what Tony Curtis and Janet Leigh were doing last February.

1963:  IN DALLAS......

Do I have to finish this?   Seriously, think about how history was altered on that day when he was shot.

1963:  FOOTBALL PLAYER HUGH MILLEN IS BORN.

And is a complete afterthought.

1963:  WRITER ALDOUS HUXLEY DIES.

Back seat, dude.   Brave new world and all.

1963:  POET C.S. LEWIS DIES.

Nobody noticed.

1968:  THE BEATLES RELEASE THEIR WHITE ALBUM.

You couldn't call it that today because it would be considered racist.

1974:  THE UN GENERAL ASSEMBLY GRANTS THE PALESTINE LIBERATION ORGANIZATION OBSERVER STATUS.

What about bathroom privileges?

1975:  JUAN CARLOS IS DECLARED KING OF SPAIN FOLLOWING THE DEATH OF FRANCISCO FRANCO.

So this wasn't just a Chevy Chase joke?

1977:  BRITISH AIRWAYS INAUGURATES A REGULAR LONDON TO NYC SUPERSONIC CONCORDE SERVICE.

Don't bother looking for frequent flyer miles.

1980:  ACTRESS MAE WEST DIES.

Come up and see her some time.   Way up.

1986:  ACTOR SCATMAN CROTHERS DIES.

I'm guessing that wasn't his real first name.

1987:   TWO CHICAGO TV STATIONS ARE HIJACKED BY AN UNKNOWN PIRATE DRESSED AS MAX HEADROOM.

A big deal for about 32 seconds.

1990:  BRITISH PRIME MINISTER MARGARET THATCHER WITHDRAWS FROM THE CONSERVATIVE PARTY LEADERSHIP ELECTION, CONFIRMING THE END OF HER PRIME MINISTERSHIP.

I'll bet this was a good day down in the coal mines.

1992:  ACTOR STERLING HOLLOWAY DIES.

Winnie the Pooh!

1995:  TOY STORY IS RELEASED AS THE FIRST FEATURE LENGTH FILM CREATED COMPLETELY USING COMPUTER GENERATED IMAGERY.

The first Pixar film and still the best.

2005:  ANGELA MERKEL BECOMES THE FIRST FEMALE CHANCELLOR OF GERMANY.

But she did not take her oath on Air Force One.

Dinner last night:  Leftover lasagna.

Tuesday, November 21, 2017

When 35 Became 36

Since everybody refers to Trump simply as 45, I thought I would extend the numbering back to when John F. Kennedy was replaced by Lyndon Johnson.  That transition, numeric or otherwise, provides the main plot points of "LBJ," a new film by Rob Reiner.   I haven't seen Rob in his Dodger season seats for about a year and a half now.  Ah, so this is what he's been up to.

Oddly, the director prefaces this film's subject as somebody he hated back in the day.  After all, Johnson is the guy that threw us full bore into the Vietnam catastrophe and Rob, of course, was a peace loving protester in the late 60s. But, this movie covers very little of that.   Like last year's "Jackie," "LBJ" focuses mostly on the days between the assassination in Dallas to the new President's first speech to a joint session of Congress several days later.   And, also like "Jackie," this film takes you through a stylistic, yet imperfect journey.  

Not to say that the attention to detail is not spot on in "LBJ."   Kudos to the production designer in charge of setting the mood and the locations.   Not to say that the acting isn't great.   Woody Harrelson really captures Lyndon Johnson and the others are also no slouches.   Particular attention should be paid to Michael Stahl-David as Bobby Kennedy, Jeffrey Donovan as JFK, and Jennifer Jason Leigh as Lady Bird.  Indeed, Donovan's JFK might be one of the best portrayals of that President on screen as it never falls into complete impersonation.

Oh, "LBJ" held my interest and its running time is nice and tight for a change.  But still, as it played out, I felt it was oddly superficial and never really delved into the inner workings of it all.  It came off more as a documentary and, frankly, I would probably have liked to see a documentary in the first place.  No new real ground was broken for somebody like me who has sucked in a lot of 20th century Presidential history.  It was intriguing to see the LBJ-RFK feud played out on the big screen, but there was no new information imparted. And, to me, they left out one scene I really would have liked to see.   It is well researched that, when Air Force One arrived back in Washington with JFK's body, RFK literally knocked over LBJ as he boarded the plane in his hurry to reach Jackie.  I missed that and it was a dramatic moment that could have enhanced the film.

Rob Reiner is making the rounds with this movie and did a Q and A at the screening I attended.   That tells me this is going to be a hard sell during the awards nomination season.   Especially if people like me find it as ultimately unsatisfying.

I liked it.   But I didn't love it.   And therein lies the issue.

LEN'S RATING:  For the authenticity alone, three stars.  Overall, two-and-a-half stars.

Dinner last night:  Beer bratwurst.


Monday, November 20, 2017

Monday Morning Video Laugh - November 20, 2017

An annual Thanksgiving classic clip from "Everybody Loves Raymond."

Dinner last night:  Steak and pan roasted tomatoes.

Sunday, November 19, 2017

The Sunday Memory Drawer - Remembering One Friday After Thanksgiving

Here we are again.   The week where we go off the rails.   Thanksgiving week.  

Starting with airport traffic, then the usual arguments among family members over turkey, and finally the running of the bulls into every shopping mall across America.

Are we having fun yet?

Personally, I love and embrace the notion of hosting friends for Thanksgiving Day dinner.   I view it all like a scientific process, beginning with the compilation of necessary cooking ingredients.  I start prepping and chopping and baking on Tuesday.   If you plan your time accordingly, cooking for that holiday should not be complicated.   The key is to keep your dishwasher going.  Over the course of three days, mine is running non-stop.

For me, the so-called "Black Friday" is one where I put my kitchen back in order.  I rarely leave the house and will usually bury myself on the couch with a movie or a book.  The fact that my friends and I have mercifully given up the tradition of swapping Christmas presents allows me to stay far from the department stores until sometime in January.

So the day after Thanksgiving is essentially a quiet one for me.   But I do remember one a long while ago.   A very special memory.

At a White Castle.


I will explain as we fondly remember that hamburger joint which still exists to some degree.   I mean, you can buy the frozen variety in your super market.

Now, the White Castle of my youth still sits in the very spot where I left it.  On the corner of Allerton Avenue and Boston Post Road in the Bronx, with the grills still cooking up those bizarre sliders of chopped meat, onion bits, and dill pickles.  This was the place of many good childhood memories.

And one lasting and final one from my adult life.

I don't remember how old I was when I first sampled that White Castle.  Maybe when I was five or six or seven.  But, most likely, I was in the back seat of some Buick as I anxiously awaited my father to roll down the driver's side window and give his order to some chick on roller skates.  Yep, she was probably a car hop who would be rolling back to us in five minutes with a tray full of goodies.  Next to getting pizza at Sorrento's underneath the White Plains Road elevated tracks near 233rd Street in the Bronx, White Castle was my favorite place to "eat out."

The combined flavor of meat patties with five holes punched into them and those fried onions was sheer heaven to me.  The sign on the building said "Buy 'Em by the Sack" and we did.  They were so small that I could wolf down five or six in one sitting.  We sat there in the car, constructing a dinner table out of the dashboard or maybe the back seat.  It was okay to get a little sloppy and those little onion bits would turn up on the leather interior days after the meal had been consumed.

My father would relate to me that this White Castle tradition had been handed down from a previous generation.  When he was a kid, they also got White Castle burgers, although I'm guessing it was a little harder to work the crank on the window that was needed to hold up the dinner tray.  Then, as he grew up, White Castle was the place to go after dances and movies with your dates.  I'd sit there hearing the stories, surveying the parking lot for any strands of history that hadn't been yet tucked away into a dusty book on a shelf.  This very drive-in restaurant had obviously acted as a very connective thread in the fabric of my family.

After a while, we stopped going and I completely forgot what a White Castle Hamburger tasted like.  Sure, there was one right across the street from Fordham University where I went to college, but we never went there.  We said they sold "murder burgers," not so much for the food quality but more because it frequently was the site of some robberies at gun point.

Yeah, White Castle disappeared from my world almost as quickly as it had appeared.

I flip the calendar pages ahead a number of years.  My father's prostate cancer had re-emerged and nestled in the bone of his leg.  Things were winding down for Dad, but he opted for a weekly chemo treatment anyway.  Usually, one of his cronies would pick him up and drive him every Friday for whatever injection he needed to have. 

So, getting back to the title of today's Memory Drawer, it was the Friday of Thanksgiving weekend and I was off.  I decided to give Dad's buddies the week off.  I'd do the honors of acting as driver for the day.  It was the least I could do for his pals who had so diligently helped him over the years.

As I helped him out of the doctor's office and into the car, I wondered what was next in the weekly routine.  Even when he was ill, my father was always all about a consistent schedule of events.  I asked him what happens next.

"Well, we usually go get something to eat."

Where?

"White Castle."

I was perplexed.  There wasn't one nearby in Mount Vernon.

"No, we go to the one down on Allerton.  Where we used to go."

Oh.  All the way down there, I thought.

Yes, all the way down.  And I shouldn't have questioned it for a single moment.

My father and I sat one more time in that parking lot.  The car hops were gone, but I brought the food out of the restaurant.  And we chomped down on five or six sliders as if the years had morphed all together into a single second.

I didn't know it that day, but it would be the very last meal I would share with my father.  Indeed, it was also the very last good memory I would keep of him.

When I went back to work after his death several months later, my friends in the office walked in and said they wanted to do something for me.  They brought in a wrapped frame.  It contained a colored sketch of one of the first White Castle restaurants.  I had obviously mentioned the significance at some point.

An odd way to commemorate my father?  Really it was the only and...best way.

The artwork still hangs in my New York apartment.   For some reason, I never moved it to California.   I should.   That way I could look at on the day after Thanksgiving.

Dinner last night:  Spaghetti with olive oil and shrimp at Gio Cucina.

Saturday, November 18, 2017

Classic TV Theme of the Month - November 2017

You might remember "Make Room for Daddy," but what about "Make Room for Granddaddy?"

Dinner last night:  Hamburger.

Friday, November 17, 2017

Your Weekend Movie Guide for November 2017

Holy crap!  Is this movie already 50 years old???   "The Jungle Book" was one of the last movies Walt Disney actually supervised and brings us back to the day when the holiday season always meant one or two new releases for Buena Vista.  This one was obviously a big deal given the televised premiere with big stars in attendance.

Ah, Hollywood the way it ought to be.   Gee, I wonder how special the releases will be this Thanksgiving.  You know the drill, folks.  I'll scour the entertainment pages of the LA Times and give you my knee jerk reaction to the crap being dumped on our cinema doorsteps.

Indeed, the meat on your Thanksgiving table might not be the only turkey you experience this month.

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri:   Blog review coming.   Spoiler alert:  Recommended.

Mudbound:   The title alone is a turn off.

Wait For Your Laugh:  Documentary about the legendary Rose Marie.  I am actually going to see it tomorrow night.

Novitiate:   Fun and games in a convent.   That's a joke.

A Fantastic Woman:  From Chile.  That's all I got.

Murder on the Orient Express:   Blog review coming.  Major derailment.

Thor - Ragnarok:  I am so far behind when it comes to super heroes.

Lady Bird:  Reviewed here the other day.   Go see it so you won't be left out on Oscar night.

Last Flag Flying:  The annual "Steve Carell desperately wants an Oscar" film.

Victoria and Abdul:   I heard this actually will start a coma.

The Killing of a Sacred Deer:   Bambi's mother again?

The Square:  Me in high school?

The Florida Project:  If it's about them seceding from the nation, I'll see it.

The Meyerowitz Stories (New and Selected):   Don't waste your money.   It's on Netflix.   On second thought, don't waste your time there.

A Bad Moms Christmas:  Better known as the Joan Crawford Christmas Special.

Daddy's Home 2:  Time to call Social Services.

Blade of the Mortal:   Sounds Kung fu-ey to me.

Jigsaw:  Puzzle.  Is this Password?

Tyler Perry's Boo 2:   The streak is alive.  I still have not seen a Tyler Perry movie.

LBJ:  Rob Reiner makes the President rather uninteresting.   I can't wait to see what he does with Trump.

American Made:  Tom Cruise as a TWA pilot who flew missions for the CIA.  For those of you who remember what TWA was.

Angelica:  Sexual repression in Victorian London.   An oxymoron if I ever heard one.

Almost Friends:  A twentysomething slacker hits on a local barista.  You might need that extra shot of espresso.

Attack of the Killer Donuts:   My money is on glazed.

Cook Off:  A mock documentary about a cooking competition.   This is the type of movie Christopher Guest would soar with.   Unfortunately, he's not involved.

I Love You, Daddy:  Louis CK's vanity project, so see it before the authorities embargo it.

Justice League:  Batman and Wonder Woman team up.   Ben Affleck is Batman.  Gal Gadot is Wonder Woman.  Len is At Home.

Roman J Israel, Esq:  Denzel Washington's yearly scenery gluttony.   And, by the way, he's my next guess for Hollywood Sexual Predator.

Wonder:  A fifth grader is mainstreamed in school.   Julia Roberts stars.   I hear this is a five Kleenex movie.

The Star:  It's a little donkey's first Christmas.   This is a cartoon, not a documentary about the President lighting the White House Christmas tree.

Destined:  Something about living in a parallel universe.   I want the one where movies like this are not playing.

Mr. Roosevelt:  This is a trick.   It has nothing to do with the President.

Geostorm:  70 percent chance of sleeping in the theater.

Dinner last night:  Lasagna.