Musical Comedy Production Number of the Month - February 2020

We get five Saturdays this month thanks to Leap Year!  Woo hoo, that means we sample a wonderful musical comedy production number.   And this one comes from one of my all time favorite musical comedies, which opened 41 years ago this month.  Gasp. Dinner last night:  Sandwich.

Hollywood Then and Now - February 2020

I am a huge fan of silent movie comedian/actor Harold Lloyd.   Back in the 1920s, the growing city of Los Angeles was one big studio lot for him.   It was not uncommon to see cameras and your favorite stars shooting out on the streets among everybody else.   

For instance, take a look at the legendary image from "Safety Last."   Now Harold wasn't really hanging high above the street.   There was some trick photography.   But this was all done outside without the benefit of...gasp...special computerized effects.

So what's the point of this?  Well, I happened to learn that a spot less than one  quarter mile from my apartment was the site of Harold Lloyd's film studio.

This studio was called the Harold Lloyd ranch and it was massive as seen in this photo from the 1930s.  How sparse is everything around this lot.   Look up at the top of the picture and you can see the steeple of what is still the Fox Westwood theater.   Thank God nobody has torn that down.

So what happened to Harold Lloyd's movie lot?

Well, eventually, all of the land was sold to the Latter Day Saints and they constructed the huge temple you see in this photograph.

Again, all of this is simply a stone's throw from my home.   

Hollywood and its environs change one more time.

Dinner last night:  Had a big lunch so just a salad.

Len's Jukebox of the Month - February 2020

Here in the dregs of Winter (or as dreggy as a winter can get in Los Angeles), let's go back to a summer song in the 80s.   Nothing says "beach" better than this ditty from Huey Lewis and the News.

Dinner last night:   German cold cut sandwich and German potato salad.

This Date in History - February 26

Happy birthday to Tom Kennedy.   Remember...it's not what you say...it's what...

364:  VALENTINIAN I IS PROCLAIMED ROMAN EMPEROR.

We can't do one of these Wednesdays without at least one knucklehead becoming Roman Emperor.

1233:  DURING THE MONGOL-JIN WAR, THE MONGOLS CAPTURE THE CAPITAL OF THE JIN DYNASTY.

Well, naturally...

1658:  AFTER A DEVASTATING DEFEAT IN THE NORTHERN WAR, THE KING OF DENMARK-NORWAY IS FORCED TO GIVE UP NEARLY HALF HIS TERRITORY TO SWEDEN.

Who knew there was such unrest in a country that ultimately gave us Inger Stevens?

1802:  AUTHOR VICTOR HUGO IS BORN.

Where ever hugo...

1815:  NAPOLEON BONAPARTE ESCAPES FROM ELBA.

If you're gonna keep that hand in your jacket, you can at least pull out your wallet when the dinner check comes.

1829:  DESIGNER LEVI STRAUSS IS BORN.

Do you have a 31 length please?

1846:  SOLDIER BUFFALO BILL IS BORN.

Thirty-nine more and you've got yourself a football team.

1887:  ACTOR WILLIAM FRAWLEY IS BORN.

Fred!!!!!

1908:  ANIMATOR TEX AVERY IS BORN.

Genius.

1909:  KINEMACOLOR, THE FIRST SUCCESSFUL COLOR MOTION PICTURE PROCESS, IS FIRST SHOWN TO THE PUBLIC IN LONDON.

Spellcheck!

1914: HMHS BRITANNIC, SISTER TO RMS TITANIC, IS LAUNCHED IN BELFAST.

Hope it stays afloat longer.

1917:  THE ORIGINAL DIXIELAND JAZZ BAND RECORDS THE FIRST JAZZ RECORD IN NEW YORK.

Well, what did you think they were going to record?  Show tunes??

1919:  PRESIDENT WOODROW WILSON SIGNS AN ACT OF THE US CONGRESS ESTABLISHING MOST OF THE GRAND CANYON AS A NATIONAL PARK.

When does the gift shop open?

1920:  ACTOR TONY RANDALL IS BORN.

Oscar, Oscar, Oscar.

1920: THE FIRST GERMAN EXPRESSIONIST FILM, THE CABINET OF DR. CALIGARI, PREMIERES IN BERLIN.

Achtung.

1921:  ACTRESS BETTY HUTTON IS BORN.

She said you can't get a man without a gun.  But then she moved in with a bunch of nuns.  You can't get a man there either.

1927:  GAME SHOW HOST TOM KENNEDY IS BORN.

The brother of game show host Jack Narz.

1928:  SINGER FATS DOMINO IS BORN.

Ain't misbehavin'.

1932:  SINGER JOHNNY CASH IS BORN.

Odds are 3-1 he came out of the womb high.

1935:  ADOLF HITLER ORDERS THE LUFTWAFFE TO BE RE-FORMED, VIOLATING THE PROVISIONS OF THE TREATY OF VERSAILLES.

Surprised?  Anybody?

1946:  FINNISH OBSERVERS REPORT THE FIRST OF MANY SIGHTINGS OF GHOST ROCKETS.

So I guess all the kooks aren't in Arkansas.

1966:  HERALDING THE APOLLO PROGRAM, THE FIRST SATURN IB ROCKET IS LAUNCHED.  

One small step coming...

1971:  UN SECRETARY GENERAL U THANT SIGNS THE UN PROCLAMATION OF EARTH DAY.

If Ella Fitzgerald had married U Thant, she would have been Ella Thant.

1980:  EGYPT AND ISRAEL ESTABLISH FULL DIPLOMATIC RELATIONS.

Who are they kidding?

1987:  DURING THE IRAN-CONTRA AFFAIR, THE TOWER COMMISSION REBUKES PRESIDENT RONALD REAGAN FOR NOT CONTROLLING HIS NATIONAL SECURITY STAFF.

"I have a national security staff?"

1993:  IN NEW YORK CITY, A TRUCK BOMB PARKED BELOW THE WORLD TRADE CENTER EXPLODES, KILLING SIX AND INJURING OVER A THOUSAND.

That was just the appetizer.

1997:  ACTOR DAVID DOYLE DIES.

Hello, Angels.

1995:  SELINA GAVE HER LAST "LIVE" CONCERT IN HOUSTON, A FEW DAYS BEFORE SHE WAS SHOT.

And then she gave her first "dead" concert.

2013:  ACTOR DALE ROBERTSON DIES.

The last Tale of Wells Fargo.

2017:  JUDGE JOSEPH WAPNER DIES.

Sustained.

Dinner last night:   Pre-movie hot dog at the Royale Theater.

Len's Recipe of the Month - February 2020

Now here's a taste from my childhood.  Taylor Ham.   Or Taylor Pork Roll.

Now when I was a kid, Taylor Ham was a cold cut my dad picked up at the deli or the pork store.   Sliced like salami or bologna, it was my absolute favorite sandwich to take to school.

It wasn't until years later that I discovered this was made a completely different way just across the river in New Jersey.   On a roll with egg and cheese, it was a staple in any diner found in the Garden State.  

Also delicious.

The good news is that I can also make it in Los Angeles as well.   Now, Taylor Ham is not easy to find in California.   Bristol Farms, the high end super market, has it and priced as Bristol Farms does with everything.   

High.

But sometimes you just have to enjoy a taste of home.

Here's how I make it.

Buy the Taylor Ham and slice a 1/2 inch thick slab.   Make four cuts around the edges so it won't curl in the pan.   Get it grilling on the stove.

In the same pan, lay down a scrambled egg and let that do its thing as well. Instead of cheddar cheese slices, I sprinkle some of that shredded Sargento over the egg that is frying.

And you want to know how to make this sandwich exquisite?  Use a pretzel roll.  It is a taste treat.

And welcome yourself back to the east coast for just a moment or two.

Dinner last night:  Teriyaki noodles.

Monday Morning Video Laugh - February 24, 2020

You deserve a break today.

Dinner last night:  Chicken with prunes and olives.

The Sunday Memory Drawer - My Journey With a Dog, Part 2

Picking up on the thread from last week following my viewing of "A Dog's Journey."

Yay, I was eight and yay, I got a dog.  Finally.

Now that Tuffy had arrived, I was all over my Schnauzer bias. In fact, I was now a Beagle boy all the way. I couldn't get enough of them or Tuffy. The fact that the New York Mets mascot was also a Beagle named Homer just made me feel even more special. To me, there was no other dog to own.

During her first months in our house, Tuffy and I were inseparable. Except for school hours, we were together constantly. In retrospect, she really became the sibling I never had. And one I didn't have to share the television set with.

The after-school walk around the neighborhood was my favorite time of day. 

Up 15th Avenue, down 14th Avenue, over across First Street, up Vista Place, and then down 15th Avenue to home. We'd stop to talk to any of my friends that were out and about. Tuffy would pause occasionally to sniff and do her other outside business. Everybody knew her name. She was our neighborhood's version of the Cheers bar. And nobody was prouder than me. This was my dog. 

A constant companion.

Until...

...my mother uttered those words that I didn't comprehend.

"Tuffy's going to have THE operation."

Huh? The mere mention of this sent shivers up my spine. You see, in those days of my youth, I was convinced that any surgery was a death sentence. Ever since my uncle, my father's brother, had gone in for some routine procedure and ended up dying a couple of weeks later, I was sure that a scalpel on any part of your body was an immediate call to the grim reaper. In my mind, nobody survived the operating table. Now, my dog was headed there. Why?

"The doctor needs to do something so she doesn't have babies."

Huh? I think I was still buying into that "God puts a seed on your plate and then you have a baby" nonsense. I needed more information. And, besides, don't we want a lot of cute little puppies? A houseful of Beagles?

"We're not made of money."

Oh, that, again. How many times are you going to trot out that chestnut?

My mother explained to me as best she could the process of spaying a dog, although, at no time, did a male dog in heat enter into the story. Still, this was probably the first ever explanation of sex that even remotely entered my mind. 

Frankly, I didn't give a shit about the logistics. Tuffy was going under what may be the sharpest knife ever known to man. And it would be done in a doctor's office. And she would have to spend the night there.

I cried non-stop for three days.

As the day of reckoning approached, I spent more and more time with my dog. I figured this was it. The end. She'd be on the table. There would be the usual complications. Nurses would be frenzied, running in and out. The vet would come out to me and say, "Sorry, there was nothing we could do." I became more and more attached to Tuffy in what I figured were her final days.

To make matters worse, I wasn't even going to be part of the entourage taking her into the doctor. That would be my mother and her girlfriend. For me, it would be a "regular" day. In school, listening to somebody drone on about long division. Sitting in class, I hit on a scheme that would disrupt the plans. If I were sick, my mother couldn't take Tuffy to the vet because she would have to come and get me from school.

I doubled up in pain and began to wail. I needed to go to the nurse's office.

Off I went to Mrs. Gueft and her office full of Band Aids and tongue depressors. 

Unbeknowst to me, the entire Grimes School had read into my charade. You see, my mother had told my teacher, Mrs. Popper, about Tuffy's surgery. And Mrs. Popper had told Mrs. Gueft. And I am guessing Mrs. Gueft had even alerted the Daily Argus, the city newspaper. So, my grimacing and dramatic clutching of my abdomen would all be for naught. They all knew what was behind my hysterics.

"Mrs. Gueft, don't you want to call my mother to come get me?"

Negative response. I would be fine. Just lay down and relax.

I reclined on the cot in her office. This was not working out the way I planned. 

And, worse, my dog was going to be dying at the hands of some butcher. 

Probably within the next hour.

"Mrs. Gueft...."

Shhhhh. Just relax. She promised I would feel better.

The only problem now was that my stomach was really starting to hurt. In earnest. But, the boy who wanted to cry "Beagle" was now perceived as the boy who was crying "Wolf." And, as far as the school nurse was concerned, I was barking up the wrong tree.

"Shhhhhh, lay still."

Eventually, the pains subsided. After a few hours, I was allowed back to class. 

And then went home to a Tuffy-less house. I was delighted to hear that Tuffy had lived, but I was pissed nonetheless. To demonstrate my anger, I refused to speak to my mother. But, downstairs, my grandmother was no help.

"Tuffy's going to be fine. I had the same operation."

Oh, wow, that was way too much information!

My dog came home the next afternoon and was really out of commission for the next week or so. She simply slept in her box. Lying on her back, I could see the doctor's handiwork. A two inch wire stuck out of her stomach. I started to cry again. Would she ever been the same again?

She was. And delighted us all for the next eighteen years.

Dinner last night:  Grilled Taylor Ham with egg and cheese on a pretzel roll.

Classic Movie Trailer of the Month - February 2020

Hard to believe.  This movie came out forty years ago this month.   Yikes.

Dinner last night:  Retrun event of BBQ meats at Gyu Kaku.

Your Weekend Movie Guide for February 2020

What a memory of my childhood.  Those wonderful newspaper ads that told you everything that was playing at the Loews chain in the New York City area.  My magnifying glass tells me that "You Were Never Lovelier" was playing at my Loews theater in my home town of Mount Vernon, New York back in February of 1943.

So now I'll check the same movie pages of the Los Angeles Times to see what's playing in February 2020.   Trust me.   Nothing will be of the caliber of "Road to Morocco." 

Parasite:   You may have heard of it.   Definitely check it out.   And note that some theaters are now showing it in a black and white version.

Harley Quinn - Birds of Prey:   I hear this barely got off the ground.

The Assistant:   I hear this is a very Harvey Weinstein-like story.   You've surely heard of him.

The Last Thing He Wanted:  Anne Hathaway as a reporter who helps her dad broker an arms deal.   That doesn't sound like fake news to me.

Downhill:  Will Ferrell and Julia Louis-Dreyfus star.   Len subsequently avoids.

Ordinary Love:   Ever since his real life wife died years ago, Liam Neeson keeps making movies where he is a widower or some hubby with a sick wife.  Isn't this getting a bit tedious?

Portrait of a Lady on Fire:  All about a painter in 1770 France.   How do you say "I'll pass" in French?

1917:  The movie I thought was going to win Best Picture.   Blog review coming.

Just Mercy:   One more legal drama about prejudice in the criminal justice system.   Do they really believe that everybody is "not guilty?"

Little Women:  Recently reviewed here...and I didn't even have a book report due.

Sonic the Hedgehog:  Whatever the fuck that is.

Fantasy Island:  No, no, Tattoo.

The Photograph:   Some diverse love story.   In five years, that's all we will have in theaters.

The Gentlemen:  Reviewed here just the other day.   I saw it primarily because Michelle Dockery was in it.

Bad Boys for Life:  Strictly for those fans of Martin Lawrence and Will Smith...all six of you.

The Lodge:   Horrors stalk a family at a winter cabin.   That's what you get for not putting chains on those tires.

Dolittle:   Robert Downey Jr. talks to the animals....without drugs.

The Call of the Wild:  The classic book with the now classically old Harrison Ford.

Emma:  The Jane Austen novel which counts me out.

Brahms - The Boy 2:   I didn't even know there was a Boy 1.

Emerald Run:   Illegal smuggling across the US-Mexico border.   Please send a screener to the White House.

I Am Fear:  Terrorist threaten to behead a celebrity journalist.  Can I put in a suggestion?

Impractical Jokers - The Movie:  Based on a TV show I never heard of.

The Night Clerk:  Murder in a hotel.   And that's before they slip the bill under your door.

Once Were Brothers - Robbie Robertson and the Band:  Another documentary produced by Ron Howard who is really digging into classical music these days.

Standing Up, Falling Down:  A failed stand-up comic moves back to Long Island where he befriends a dermatologist.   A bombed out career AND eczema???

Premature:   Another romance set in Harlem.  See The Photograph above.

Dinner last night:  Chopped salad with bacon bits and maple bourbon dressing.

The Last of a Film Franchise?

Well, at least, that's what they're saying.   Yep, "Star Wars - The Rise of Skywalker" is supposed to be the ninth and final chapter of this film franchise that began in 1977.

Uh huh.   Did you just hear a cash register open?  If there is money to be made, they will keep coming up with reasons to take us to that galaxy long ago and far away.

Okay, truth be told, I would not qualify as a die-hard Star Wars fan.  I did go opening weekend of the very first release.   But, with each subsequent edition, I have gotten less and less interested.   Oh, I've seen all of them.   But, let's face it, it took me about a month to get around to seeing this one.  And frankly, the only real attraction for me was to see how they managed to include Carrie Fisher who has been dead for two years.

Spoiler alert:   yes, Princess Leia is included and not via special effects or any magic tricks.   They used footage for the film they shot several years ago and it amazingly seems to be perfectly integrated into the plot.  It's a fine send-off for Carrie as well as for Mark Hamill and....spoiler alert again...Harrison Ford.

As for the plot and the current characters, the last few Star Wars films have taken a cue from Hollywood and gotten more diverse and female-powered.   I have no issue with that but, for me, all those new folks are sort of uninteresting.   

I have heard from some friends who are Star Wars geeks that they hated this last film.  Indeed, the plot of "Star Wars - The Rise of Skywalker" is pretty much on par with every other film in the franchise.   Lots of sky battles.  Lots of explosions.  Lots of rubbery characters.   And, usually for me.....lots and lots and lots of confusion over just what is happening.   As a result, I was addled one more time with this edition.   As per usual.    

Nevertheless, who am I to argue with this ultra-successful film franchise?  It has certainly provided me with some decent entertainment, even if I'm not seeing at a midnight showing on opening night while dressed as a Jedi.

Bravo, George Lucas and company.   "Star Ears - The Rise of Skywalker" is a suitable finale.

Oh, did I use the word "finale?"   Um, yeah, right.

LEN'S RATING:  Three stars. 

Dinner last night:  Grilled Taylor ham and cheese sandwich.

This Date in History - February 19

Happy birthday to Smokey Robinson.  Ah, the miracle of childbirth.

197:   EMPEROR SEPTIMIUS SEVERUS DEFEATS USURPER CLODIUS ALBINUS IN THE BATTLE OF LUGDUNUM.

Five points if you know either of these guys and where Lugdunum is.

356:  EMPEROR CONSTANTIUS II ISSUES A DECREE CLOSING ALL PAGAN TEMPLES IN THE ROMAN EMPIRE.

So, I'm assuming he is anti-Pagan.

1600:  THE PERUVIAN STRATOVOLCANO HUAYNAPUTINA EXPLODES IN THE MOST VIOLENT RECORDED ERUPTION OF SOUTH AMERICA.

Was the stratovolcano by the same people who produced Strat-O-Matic Baseball?

1807:  FORMER US VICE PRESIDENT AARON BURR IS ARRESTED FOR TREASON IN ALABAMA.

Hence, the word "former."

1846:  IN AUSTIN, TEXAS, THE NEWLY FORMED TEXAS STATE GOVERNMENT IS OFFICIALLY INSTALLED.  

Today, they want to be their own country.

1847:  THE FIRST GROUP OF RESCUERS REACHES THE DONNER PARTY.

And why do I think this group failed, necessitating a second group of rescuers?

1859:  DANIEL E. SICKLES, A NEW YORK CONGRESSMAN, IS ACQUITTED OF MURDER ON GROUNDS OF TEMPORARY INSANITY.

As opposed to NY Congressman Charles Rangel, whose insanity was permanent.

1861:  SERFDOM IS ABOLISHED IN RUSSIA.

Serfs Up!

1878:  THOMAS EDISON PATENTS THE PHONOGRAPH.

So we should blame him for Lady GaGa.

1884:  MORE THAN SIXTY TORNADOES STRIKE THE SOUTHERN US.

The nineteenth century's edition of Global Warming.

1916:  JOCKEY EDDIE ARCARO IS BORN.

Paying $5.50, $4.30, and $3.70.

1940:  SINGER SMOKEY ROBINSON IS BORN.

Named because one of his relatives wanted to remind him always that he was Black.  Okay, done.

1942:  DURING WORLD WAR II, NEARLY 250 JAPANESE WARPLANES ATTACK THE AUSTRALIAN CITY OF DARWIN.

I never knew that Australia was under attack, too.

1942:  PRESIDENT FRANKLIN D. ROOSEVELT SIGNS THE EXECUTIVE ORDER 9066, ALLOWING FOR JAPANESE-AMERICANS TO BE RELOCATED INTO INTERNMENT CAMPS.

That's what they get for bombing kangaroos.

 1945:  ABOUT 30,000 US MARINES LAND ON THE ISLAND OF IWO JIMA.

Who's got the flag???

1953:  GEORGIA APPROVES THE FIRST LITERATURE CENSORSHIP BOARD IN THE US.

For those in the state who could actually read.

1963: THE PUBLICATION OF BETTY FRIEDAN'S "THE FEMININE MYSTIQUE."

The end of the American housewife begins.

1969:  ACTRESS MADGE BLAKE DIES.

Aunt Harriet on TV's "Batman."

1976:  EXECUTIVE ORDER 9066, AS BEGAN IN 1942, IS RESCINDED BY PRESIDENT GERALD FORD.

Well, it was fun while it lasted.

1985:  WILLIAM SCHROEDER BECOMES THE FIRST RECIPIENT OF AN ARTIFICIAL HEART TO LEAVE THE HOSPITAL.

Key phrase is "leave the hospital."

1996:  BASEBALL OWNER CHARLIE FINLEY DIES.

Now who's the real jackass?

2001:  THE OKLAHOMA CITY BOMBING MUSEUM IS DEDICATED.

Wow, that went up fast.  Unlike the memorial near Ground Zero.

2001:  FILM DIRECTOR STANLEY KRAMER DIES.

Guess Who's Coming to Heaven?

2003:  SINGER JOHNNY PAYCHECK DIES.

Cashing it in.

2016:  AUTHOR HARPER LEE DIES.

Mockingbird.  Dead.

Dinner last night:   Pasta with ricotta and tomatoes.

Dolor Y Gloria

Look how diverse I can be.   Titling today's blog piece with the Spanish translation of the movie I am reviewing.   Don't be that impressed.   The Spanish title is what they used in the film.

How did I wind up seeing this?   A-ha.   An errant screener popped up and I had heard Oscar buzz about the star Antonio "formerly Melanie Griffith's husband" Banderas.   As it turned out, Antonio got a Best Actor nomination.   I also had seen some of the director Pedro Almodovar's other work, although I can't remember which ones at this junction.   Is that enough rationale for you today?

Oddly, I thoroughly enjoyed "Pain and Glory" and the kudos received by Banderas are justified.   Indeed, this is probably Almodovar filming his own memoirs.   The lead character is an aging gay film director.   Almodovar is gay and 70.   Check those boxes.   Additionally, the movie character, Salvador, is experiencing a lot of problems that old people suffer.   He needs to lean on a cushion when kneeling on the floor.   He has a condition where he can't swallow.   He's got ear issues.   Hopefully, his DGA benefits are paid up.

To make matters worse or better, one of his films from years ago has been restored and he is being sought after to produce Q and A's at screenings.   This is too much for Salvador to handle so he starts on a heroin regimen.   I don't think this is Dr. Oz-approved.  

Against this backdrop, present day Salvador looks to make amends with an actor he has previously feuded, reconnect with an old boyfriend, and eventually try to kick the habit.   In between, we are treated to Salvador's recollections of his childhood with his hard working mother (Penelope Cruz).  In the past, we are treated to Salvador's first creative instincts, his first sexual attraction to a male, and other rites of childhood passage.

If this all sounds like you have seen it before, you haven't.  Almodovar tells this dual tale in a marvelous way that always gives you something neat to look at.  And, while the story has been done to death, it still feels new.   And I was really caught by the nifty twist in the last two minutes of the movie.   It literally made me smile.

After the movie, I even understood the title.   Regardless of whether it was in English or Spanish, it's the same.   Everybody endures pain and glory in life.   

Or dolor y gloria.

Dinner last night:  Leftover chicken and rice.

Monday Morning Video Laugh - February 17, 2020

Seacrest...out!

Dinner last night:  Fried chicken and rice.

The Sunday Memory Drawer - My Journey With a Dog, Part 1

I just watched a movie via Netflix that actually had me in tears.   Something called "A Dog's Journey."  It was how some dog kept getting reincarnated across a bunch of different owners.   It really got to me, especially in light of the fact that I cannot have a dog in my apartment.

The problem is that I really would like one.   And I think back to the one pooch I did have in my life.

You've seen this picture of my beagle Tuffy before. Sadly, it's the only photo of her, so it will turn up everytime I do a piece about my childhood pet. The good news is that this is also the only known snapshot of our kitchen sink and stove. 

Trust me, that's welcome news for all.

Tuffy was the present I got for my eighth birthday, so we are just past this anniversary. After about a year of family deliberation, it was finally decided that a dog could be added to our household. The discussion prior to her arrival made the Yalta Peace Talks during World War II look like an episode of the "Rachael Ray Show."

You see, Tuffy wasn't supposed to be Tuffy. Lucy, I'll 'splain.

The dog acquisition dialogue had begun the summer prior. Usually precipitated by my annoying question. When can I have a dog?

"Ask your father."

Dad?

"Ask your mother."

Mom?

"Ask your father."

Round and round and round it went.

Other voting precincts checked in. The grandparents downstairs. First, Grandpa.

"What do you want a dog for?"

"Grandma?

"I'm not going to clean up all that poop."

Got it. So, you can see how hard it was to get them all on the same page. Once it was confirmed that, yes, a pooch would be coming at some point, we needed to decide just what breed to get. Now, I had cousins who owned a collie. Forget the cute Lassie connection embedded there. A boy and his dog. My cousin's collie was a virtual horse that may or may not have run some races as a trotter at Yonkers Raceway. There was really no need and/or desire to have a dog like Lassie in our midst. First of all, I rarely fell into a well. And Grandma had already essayed a keen observation on my cousin's pet.

"That dog makes a lot of poop."

Other relatives had a cocker spaniel and my mother had a desire to duplicate that. As for me, I was less than interested. The cocker spaniel didn't look like a "guy's dog." Maybe a guy living in West Hollywood. I imagined proudly walking my best friend up and down the block. I couldn't see doing that with a cocker spaniel. To me, this breed was the perfect target for a firecracker up the ass. 

Sadly, we actually had kids in our neighborhood who specialized in just that kind of flagrant activity.

Ultimately, we settled on what we wanted for a dog. One of those miniature Schnauzers. With the slight German connection, we thought this would make it an easier sell for Grandma.

"They still poop."

Okay, got it.

For the next several months, we immersed ourselves in all things Schnauzer. We even went to the local pet store and bought a book devoted to the care and wellness of a Schnauzer. Even the names we started to debate all took on that general German flavor as well. Potentially, our dog could be named after a food.

"Sauerbraten."

"Schnitzel."

"Rheingold." That was Grandpa's suggestion.

Or an actual German person.

"Hans."

"Helga."

"Johann."

At various points, we referred to our still-coming dog with every possible German word or name in the Berlitz book, except perhaps for "Adolf."

As my birthday approached, I'd ask the same question every day.

"When is Schnitzel coming?"

Soon, I would hear back. But, as we got closer and closer to my special day, the answers started to change. And sounded more and more ominous.

"Ask your father."

Uh oh. I smelled another argument brewing. Apparently, Dad had been entrusted with the shopping and acquisition of said animal. And was probably late coming through with the goods. 

My birthday came and went. No dog.

"Where's Rheingold?"

The previously terse responses had morphed into sneers and grunts.

Uh oh.

I came home from school the day after my birthday. As I bounded up the stairs to our part of the house, I heard the sound of a chain being dragged against the kitchen floor. Was this at last Johann? Or had we purchased a slave?

I ran down the hall into the kitchen and was greeted by my parents. And my new dog.

It was not a Schnauzer. It didn't look like Schnitzel or Hans or Sauerbraten. 

After months of studying books about Schnauzers, I was floored as I stared at the little dog on the floor.

"What's that???"

Mom sneered.

"That's a beagle."

Oh.

What had happened was that my dad had gotten a deal. In his part time job delivering oil for his cousin, my father had a pet store as a client. The guy had all these beagles in the window and Dad cut a bargain. For a full breed beagle, my father had negotiated the price of 25 bucks for the dog. Hey, he had secured the animal. He had done his part. And, after all...

"We're not made of money."

Oh.

Mom and I had to regroup quickly. All the names we had on our list no longer fit. For about a week, our beagle was simply referred to as "the dog." And no one name seemed to work. How we arrived at the ultimate choice? I have no idea. Our new arrival just sort of emerged into "Tuffy."

And, despite my disappointment those first days, Tuffy and I became inseparable. It was truly a boy and his dog. We operated as one entity.

Until...

To be continued.

Dinner last night:  Pepperoni pizza from Maria's.

Classic TV Theme Song of the Month - February 2020

On the prime time schedule fifty years ago this month?   How about this one?

Dinner last night:  Leftover turkey chili.

Take Your Daughter to the Movies Day

Well, I don't have a daughter, but I still went to see "Little Women."  And I lived to talk about it.

Okay, first off, I have never been exposed to the Louisa May Alcott book.   I would argue that not a single boy has ever read it.   I mean, why would they?  And, despite the fact that there have already been three screen adaptations of the book, I might have seen about ten minutes of the one with Elizabeth Taylor about fifteen years ago on TCM.

This is all to say that "Little Women" was pretty new territory for me.  And, as this fourth cinematic iteration, I was in the capable hands of writer and director Greta Gerwig.  I'm pretty sure I got the full "Little Women" treatment thanks to her.

Gerwig is rapidly becoming a force to be reckoned with in Movieland.  Her previous work with "Lady Bird" was astounding and she goes to the well a second time here by casting "Lady Bird" star Saoirse Ronan as the main March sister, Jo.  Ronan is definitely headed to the Oscar ceremonies again for her work in "Little Women."

Alcott's novel is set in the 1860s and brings us the adventures, trials, and tribulations of the four March sisters and their Marmee as they await their dad's return from the Civil War.  As ancient as that sounds, Gerwig somehow manages to make it all feel contemporary.  There is an underlying theme of girl empowerment that connects the plot points of the story as Jo works to become a writer.  And, while there are boys in the tale, they are surely secondary characters.  

Indeed, Gerwig's production design team was remarkable as they conveyed a New England landscape that looked both beautiful and dingy at the same time.  It is all well cast as well with particularly good performances from the likes of Laura Dern (how reliable has she become?), Timothee Chalamet, Tracy Letts, and the always-managing-to-get-work Meryl Streep.

But, when it's all said and done, this is still Louisa May Alcott's story.  And it's one that Greta Gerwig must have gotten a book report A+ on back in the eighth grade.  She clearly loved the novel because she has crafted a screen adaptation with tender love and care.  She should have won the Oscar for screenplay.  Heck, she should have been nominated for the Directing Oscar.

LEN'S RATING:  Three-and-a-half stars.

Dinner last night:  Barbecue chopped salad with bacon.

Detonated

Well, the Oscars are in the rear view mirror, but here I am still posting reviews for movies that opened a while back.

At the screening where I saw "Bombshell," there was a guy behind me who viewed the proceedings on film as if it were the seventh games of the NHL Stanley Cub finals.   He was verbally reacting with excitement as some of the characters got their punishment for dirty deeds.   Clearly, he was not a fan of Fox News.

Herein lies the good and bad attributes of a movie like "Bombshell," which is allegedly based on real events.   It was appealing to the clown behind me because it was equating all conservative viewpoints as bad and evil and guilty of sexual harassment.  Little does this idiot realize but those dastardly acts of conducting business are widespread.   Indeed, they are committed by both sides of the aisle.   In Congress.   In media companies.   In practically all businesses.

Now, while my interest was held all the way through by "Bombshell's" story and particularly its acting, the movie is incredibly flawed.  As you may well know, it's all the horrible (and now dead) Roger Ailes and his penchant to use some "questionable" methods to build the talent pool behind the Fox News Network.  Much of this story was found in newspapers over the past four years.  It is well documented.   But, as I watched it all, I began to wonder just what was the source material used by screenwriter Charles Randolph to tell his story.  Was there a book?   Or a magazine article?  Or an "as told to?"  Did he interview a lot of the real people in the tale?

From what I could find out post-movie, no.   Most of the action behind the headlines was speculation.   Conversations that could have happened.  He pretty much laid out the events as they might have happened.

And I thought about the dope behind me who probably thought he was watching a documentary.

I contrast that with the Clint Eastwood film "Richard Jewell," which has gotten a lot of bad press because of its unflattering portrayal of the print media.  Some call that movie stilted.   Yet, it is based on a magazine article and source material that has been proven to be accurate.  

And that's why you can't always view these movies "based on true events" as gospel.  Former Fox News anchor Megyn Kelly, whose "character" is the virtual star of "Bombshell," has admitted that the film has lots of inaccuracies.   She should know.  She lived it.

But, the good thing about "Bombshell" is that it presents a story that needed to be told in concept.  Sexual harassment is a serious business today and the more it is exposed, the better we will be.   For that, we can salute director Jay Roach for bringing it to the screen.   Of the cast, Charlize Theron, Nicole Kidman, and Margot Robbie do good work in getting the audience to care about their plight.  While their "whistleblowing" characters are well drawn and realistic, Roach hurts his film by taking a cartoon approach to the rest of the people involved in the story (Richard Kind as Rudy Guiliani??!!).

So, at its conclusion, I neither loved or hate "Bombshell."   A true example of flawed cinema.  And this didn't likely matter to the dummy behind me.

Now, if you're talking about really good source material on the sexual harassment issue in media companies, let's hope somebody has the chutzpah to make a movie based on Ronan Farrow's book detailing the shenanigans of Harvey Weinstein and Matt Lauer at NBC News.  There is a lot there, for sure. And is the perfect validation that this issue straddles both conservative and liberal sides of the fence.

And why do I think the guy behind me won't go see that one?

LEN'S RATING:  Three stars.

Dinner last night:  Leftover chili.