New Year's Eve The Way They Used to Be

Before there was Ryan Seacrest and Anderson Cooper and even Dick Clark, there was Ben Grauer!   Enjoy as he heralds in...1966!

 

Dinner last night:  Tomato soup.

This Date in History - December 30

 

Happy birthday to Sandy Koufax.  Yikes!  Eighty-five years old today.

1066:  A MUSLIM MOBS STORMS THE ROYAL PALACE IN GRANADA.

Already???

1460:  THE WAR OF THE ROSES - THE BATTLE OF WAKEFIELD.

I don't think it's the section of the Bronx.

1813:  BRITISH SOLDIERS BURN BUFFALO, NEW YORK.

The city never wins.  If not fire, it's snow.

1853:  THE UNITED STATES BUYS LAND FROM MEXICO TO FACILITATE RAILROAD BUILDING IN THE SOUTHWEST.

You'll be sorry.

1896:  CANADIAN ICE HOCKEY PLAYER ERNIE MCLEA SCORES THE FIRST HAT TRICK IN STANLEY CUP PLAY.

That's three goals in one game for those not in the know.

1903:  A FIRE AT THE IROQUOIS THEATER IN CHICAGO, ILLINOIS KILLS AT LEAST 605.  

The popcorn machine must have gotten out of hand.

1914:  ACTOR BERT PARKS IS BORN.

There he is...

1919:  LINCOLN'S INN IN LONDON ADMITS ITS FIRST FEMALE BAR STUDENT.

But when are we letting women into the pub?

1920:  ACTOR JACK LORD IS BORN.

Aloha.

1922:  THE UNION OF SOVIET SOCIALIST REPUBLIC IS FORMED.

Da.

1934:  ACTOR JOSEPH BOLOGNA IS BORN.

All beef.

1934:  ACTOR RUSS TAMBLYN IS BORN.

When you're a Jet...

1935:  BASEBALL STAR SANDY KOUFAX IS BORN.

Be careful with that left arm, son.

1935:  ACTOR JACK RILEY IS BORN.

Mr. Carlin on the Bob Newhart Show.

1936:  THE UNITED AUTO WORKERS UNION STATES ITS FIRST SITDOWN STRIKE.

Well, it didn't take long to piss them off.

1942:  MUSICIAN MICHAEL NESMITH IS BORN.

Hey, hey, he's a Monkee...

1948:  THE BROADWAY MUSICAL "KISS ME KATE" OPENS AND BECOMES THE FIRST SHOW TO WIN THE BEST MUSICAL TONY AWARD.

Brush up your Shakespeare.

1957:  TV HOST MATT LAUER IS BORN.

Wikipedia calls him a journalist.   HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.  I call him a sex fiend.

1965:  FERDINAND MARCOS BECOMES PRESIDENT OF THE PHILIPPINES.

Dig the wife with all the shoes.

1970:  BOXER SONNY LISTON DIES.

KO-ed.

1972:  VIETNAM WAR - THE UNITED STATES HALTS HEAVY BOMBING OFF NORTH VIETNAM.

It's about time.

1977:  FOR THE SECOND TIME, TED BUNDY ESCAPES FROM HIS JAIL CELL.

No prison can hold me, you dirty rats.

1981:  HOCKEY'S WAYNE GRETZKY SCORES FIVE GOALS, GIVING HIM 50 ON THE YEAR.

A scoring machine plus one hot wife.   So he scored at home, too.

1993:  AGENT IRVING LAZAR DIES.

Swifty!

1993:  ISRAEL AND VATICAN CITY ESTABLISH DIPLOMATIC RELATIONS.

So, sit, we'll talk, Pope-ila.

1996:  ACTOR LEW AYRES DIES.

Paging Dr. Kildare.

1996:  PROPOSED BUDGET CUTS BY BENJAMIN NETANYAHU SPARKS PROTESTS FROM 250,000 WORKERS.

So he's not really the beloved guy we've all heard about.

2004:  MUSICIAN ARTIE SHAW DIES.

He was once hooked up with Lana Turner, so no dummy he.

2006:  FORMER PRESIDENT OF IRAQ SADDAM HUSSEIN IS EXECUTED.

Good things happen to those who wait.

2014:  ACTRESS LUISE RAINER DIES.

She was 104.  Won an Oscar for "The Good Earth."  Now under it.

Dinner last night:  Repeating success.  French toast again.

Hollywood Then And Now - December 2020

 

It's amazing what you find when driving around Hollywood on an empty day after Christmas.

Here you see the infamous Bette Davis in costume on location at the house she and Blanche lived in for the delicious film "Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?"  I remember reading somewhere that the real house was in Hollywood and currently for sale.

Imagine my surprise when it turned up right in front of me as I was doing errands.

There it sits in Hancock Park.  And what's that to the left?  The gate which Joan Crawford was opening as Bette Davis hit the gas pedal.  

Vrooom, vrooom.

And yes, that's a "for sale" sign.   I wonder if there are still rats in the basement.

Dinner last night:  Leftover Chinese food.

Monday Morning Video Laugh - December 28, 2020

 A great way to get rid of this year...watching how a stupid and drunk "journalist" rang in 2020.    Asshole.

Dinner last night:  Breakfast for dinner---Challah French toast and bacon.

The Sunday Memory Drawer - The Tried and True New Year's Eve Blog Post

 

Yes, we've been down this road before, folks.  I repeat this blog post more than any other.   And, in this year, where NOBODY will be going anywhere to celebrate, I might as well drag it out one more time.

Of course, we are discussing past New Year's Eves.

The photo above is historic as previous blog entries will remind you. You may recall my tale of serving as the seven-year-old bartender for some family gatherings on December 31. Here I am on one of those infamous nights. Unfortunately, I couldn't find any photos of some relatives lying drunk underneath the buffet table of cold cuts and German potato salad.

It all came about because I had nothing else to do at these parties usually held at some relative's home or perhaps even our own freezing meat locker of a basement. At this age, I was in a party purgatory. I had nobody my age to play with. My older cousins were usually sequestered in some dark corner of the house with whatever girlfriend or boyfriend they were either groping or being groped by at the moment. They didn't need me hanging around with my nagging questions. 

"Why are your hands there??" 

I often heralded in the new year with the greeting, "go away, kid."

So, I wound up with the adults, listening to dirty jokes that I didn't get. I'd camp out at the liquor table. My family was so proud of the array of bottles that they would feature at these soirees that I actually have uncovered photos of nothing but booze.

To keep myself busy, I would help my father make the drinks. At first, I was relegated to the placement of ice cubes. Then, I graduated to the insertion of tonic, Tom Collins mix, or whatever soft beverage was being included. At some point, my father decided to go and have some fun on his own and I would man the cocktail dispenser all by myself. Each relative would come up and direct me how to make whatever libation they were desiring. And, pretty much, every dialogue included this exchange:

Relative: "Whoa, you put way too much booze in there."

Me: "Okay, I'll start over."

Relative: "No, no, don't throw it out. I'll drink it."

This happened every single time. It's no wonder why most of my family was tanked by 12:15AM. At this point, they didn't give a shit whether it was New Year's Eve or Arbor Day. When I canvassed my dad's slide of these parties, I could actually tell what time the photo was taken from the looks of some of those faces. 

In one shot, I saw some distant uncle modeling certain body parts made out of balloons. Now, regardless of your age, every family member at this party was R-rated. Except for me. Hell, even Grandma and Tante Emma would get into the act with a polka. 
Back then, this photo meant nothing to me. In retrospect, it looks like a senior citizen center's production of "The Children's Hour."

And, given the stress level of my solitary confinement at these gatherings, I couldn't even calm myself by eating. Not that the food we put out was bad. But, for me, there was one bowl on the table that tainted everything else. 

Herring in sour cream. The odor was nauseating. It permeated the entire buffet. The ham smelled like herring. The pickles smelled like herring. I started to smell like herring. And I have no idea who the fuck was eating this shit. I think my grandfather did. As a result, there might have been some years where I avoided him until July or August.

While these parties sometimes lasted till 2 or 3AM, I usually didn't. I'd get bored and head up to bed, carefully tiptoeing around some oversexed cousin who was crawling on top of some date on the stairs. I vowed that the next New Year's Eve would be better for me. It never was.

Oh, it would be years later that there would be some year-end celebrations that would be memorable for me. 

In college, we once welcomed the passage of time with a raucous hockey game in the dorm hallways, using a friend's crutches as sticks. 

There'd be another year where I went to a taping of the Tonight Show. As it recorded at 530PM, the audience was coached on how to sing "Auld Lang Syne" six hours early.

There was the year where my fractured shoulder was in a sling and I could barely reach for the dice playing Trivial Pursuit at a neighbor's house. 

There were years when I remembered what I saw my cousins doing and I put the memories to good use myself. 

And there was the fateful Eve where I returned from a house party to hear that my mom had just lapsed into an irreversible coma at the hospital. Suddenly, the herring smell years paled in comparison.

And then there was my favorite New Year's Eve of all time. 1984. I had wavered on definitive plans when a good friend called with a bright idea. He and his wife were going downtown to an oldies club called Shout. In the truest spirit of marketing, the place played the song several nights that night. My friends even had another girl going, so we could easily divide the drink bill equally four ways.

To be honest, I don't remember who they brought along, because I danced with so many people that night. The evening was electric. One big hit from the 50s and 60s after another. At several points out on the dance floor, we toasted catcher Gary Carter, who the Mets had just obtained in a trade. At midnight, they dragged out "Shout" one more time. And we did. I kissed a few of the patrons around me. I had no clue who they were. I didn't give a shit. It was that free. And easy. And spontaneous.

We had so much fun that, by January 2, I was already making plans to duplicate it the following year. And we kept spreading the word around amongst other friends as if we were sharing a secret handshake. By the time December, 1985 had rolled around, most of the names in my Filofax had been invited. And I had a girlfriend, to boot. A non-stranger to kiss at the stroke of 12. This was going to be super-electric.

It was horrible.

What had been spontaneous the year before was now over-planned to the hilt. 

And the cast of thousands of my friends didn't exactly mesh. It was the Hindenburg of celebrations. To make the gloom even more pronounced, we got word in the middle of the evening that Ricky Nelson had been killed in a plane crash.

To this day, I still don't know what happened from one year to another. I'm not even sure the club stayed open much longer. New Year's Eve eventually returned to "crapshoot" status as far as I was concerned.

These days, I usually keep it quiet. A nice dinner out with some West Coast friends. I try to call my East Coast pals at 9PM so we can still celebrate New York New Year's Eve at the same time. But, the one constant throughout all the years? I've always been sober.That's because I always make sure never to get a drink from a seven-year-old bartender.

As for kicking 2020 in the ass, my plans are....well, where are those take out menus?

Dinner last night:  Mongolian beef from Chin Chin.

Classic Movie Trailer of the Month - December 2020

 Oddly enough, this movie was released during the summer!

Dinner last night:  Filet mignon, Lyonnaise potatoes, brussels sprouts, and cucumber salad.

A Different Kind of Christmas Day

 

This pretty much sums it all up on this Christmas Day.   Be safe.  Be healthy.  But still be merry.

Dinner last night:  Pepperoni and mushroom pizza from Maria's.

Len's Jukebox of the Month - December 2020

I hate a lot of Christmas songs, but this one never has me turning the dial.   So infectious and fun.  God bless the Waitresses.  Enjoy your Christmas Eve.

Dinner last night:  Grilled ham steak and salad.

This Date in History - December 23

 

Happy birthday, Mr. Burns.   Well, not really him....see below.

484:  HUNERIC DIES AND IS SUCCEEDED BY HIS NEPHEW GUNTHAMUND, WHO BECOMES KING OF THE VANDALS.

Are these the same vandals you often find on the NYC subway system?

558:  CHLOTHAR I IS CROWNED KING OF THE FRANKS.

I thought that was Oscar Mayer.

562:  HAGIA SOPHIA IN CONSTANTINOPLE REOPENED WITH A REBUILT DOME AFTER A SERIES OF EARTHQUAKES CAUSED THE ORIGINAL TO COLLAPSE.

Are they going to put down some Astro turf?

679:  KING DAGOBERT II IS MURDERED WHILE HUNTING.

Who shot him?  A deer?

1783:  GEORGE WASHINGTON RESIGNS AS COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF OF THE CONTINENTAL ARMY IN MARYLAND.

See!   Telling the truth about that cherry tree did have some blowback.

1823:  A VISIT FROM ST. NICHOLAS, ALSO KNOWN AS THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS, IS PUBLISHED ANONYMOUSLY.

Anonymously?   Okay, I'll come clean.  I wrote it.

1893:  THE OPERA HANSEL AND GRETEL BY ENGELBERT HUMPERDINCK IS FIRST PERFORMED.

Okay, not that Engelbert Humperdinck.

1913:  THE FEDERAL RESERVE ACT IS SIGNED INTO LAW BY PRESIDENT WOODROW WILSON, CREATING THE FEDERAL RESERVE SYSTEM.

Over a hundred years later, there's probably not much left in it.

1919:  SEX DISQUALIFICATION (REMOVAL) ACT 1919 BECOMES LAW IN THE UNITED KINGDOM.

What?  Who?  How?  Ouch.

1935:  FOOTBALL STAR PAUL HORNUNG IS BORN.

For all you Cheese Heads out there.

1938:  DISCOVERY OF THE FIRST MODERN COELACANTH IN SOUTH AFRICA.

Any guesses?

1941:  WORLD WAR II - AFTER 15 DAYS OF FIGHTING, THE JAPANESE ARMY OCCUPIES WAKE ISLAND.

Oh, sure, they're on a roll.  For now.

1943:  ACTOR HARRY SHEARER IS BORN.

Smithers!!!!!

1946:  ACTRESS SUSAN LUCCI IS BORN.

And her mother welcomed....all her children.

1947:  THE TRANSISTOR IS FIRST DEMONSTRATED AT BELL LABS.

You mean I can hear radio out of this little thing?

1954:  THE FIRST SUCCESSFUL KIDNEY TRANSPLANT.

And how many were unsuccessful?

1968:  THE 82 SAILORS FROM THE USS PUEBLO ARE RELEASED AFTER ELEVEN MONTHS OF INTERNMENT IN NORTH KOREA.

Back then, they captured submarines.   Today, they hijack computer servers.

1970:  THE NORTH TOWER OF THE WORLD TRADE CENTER IN NY BECOMES THE TALLEST BUILDING IN THE WORLD.

For the next 31 years.

1982:  ACTOR JACK WEBB DIES.

The obituary you are about to read is true.

1982:  THE US ENVIRONMENTAL PROTECTION AGENCY ANNOUNCES IT HAS IDENTIFIED DANGEROUS LEVELS OF DIOXIN IN MISSOURI.

The stuff I wash my hair with is called Nioxin.   I wonder what the hell kind of damage I'm doing to my scalp.

1986:  VOYAGER, PILOTED BY DICK RUTAN AND JEANA YEAGER, LANDS IN CALIFORNIA, BECOMING THE FIRST AIRCRAFT TO FLY NON-STOP AROUND THE WORLD WITHOUT AERIAL OR GROUND REFUELING.

But I bet they still lost some luggage.

2000:  ACTOR BILLY BARTY DIES.

He was 76, so he didn't come up that short.

2000:  PIANIST VICTOR BORGE DIES.

Period semi-colon.

2010:  A MONSOONAL TROUGH CROSSES THE NORTHEASTERN COAST OF AUSTRALIA FROM THE CORAL SEA.

Right in the middle of Australia's summer season.

2012:  MURDERER JEAN HARRIS DIES.

Guilty.

Dinner last night:  Grilled bratwurst and rice.

Len's Recipe of the Month - December 2020

 

Still stuck for a side dish on your socially distant holiday table?   Can I suggest this fast and easy one?   Lyonnaise potatoes.   Apparently, a dish from France.   I tried it on Thanksgiving and it was delicious.   And a snap which will allow you to enjoy some egg nog with your masked guests.

For this concoction, you want to use Yukon Gold potatoes because they taste best and have the ability to soak up butter.   Get two pounds of them.   The jury is out on whether you should peel them.   I didn't.

Slice up the potatoes into quarter-inch pieces.   Get about 4 to 6 tablespoons of unsalted butter melting in a pan.  Add the potatoes.   Sprinkle some kosher salt over them.  Cover and let them cook for about 15 minutes.

While that is going on, slice one sweet onion into rainbow arc slices.    

Turn over the potatoes and now add the onions.  Add some more kosher salt. Cover and let cook for another 15 minutes until the onion caramelizes.   

Sprinkle with parsley and serve in a pretty dish.

You're welcome.

Dinner last night:  Leftover Chinese food.

Monday Morning Video Laugh - December 21, 2020

 A classic Video Laugh that runs here every year.

Dinner last night:  Filet mignon and Spanish rice.

The Sunday Memory Drawer - "Smile! It's Christmas"

 

Or so my Dad would say every holiday season.

It was inevitable.   At least it was for about five years.  When I was a really small type, my father was a big photography buff.  He had gotten himself an Argus Technicolor camera.  Perfect to capture for posterity all the golden moments of his young family and the holiday celebrations we all enjoyed.  The camera was always at the ready.

About ten years ago, I had my dad's Technicolor slides transferred to a DVD.  The photos are badly in need of a Turner Classic Films restoration, but that is likely too late.  There are some that have deteriorated to the point that you can't even make out facial features.

But, as I flip through them all one more time, I see Technicolor that has faded.   The memories indeed have not.  You've seen some of these photos before on previous Christmases.   But isn't that what snapshots are for?  To revisit again and again and again.

So, enjoy Christmas again as seen through my father's camera lens.   My own set of "Awkward Family Photos."

Christmas morning was always a haul for me.  Some of the big ticket items this year were a hobby horse and a piano....  

 ....which I immediately attempted to play.  There is sheet music.  For a four-year-old???  Meanwhile, you can see a special holiday appearance by Mickey Mouse.

Once I saw what Santa had brought me in our place up on the second floor, I'd scoot downstairs to see what he had left for me in Grandma and Grandpa's place.  This year, it must have been a teddy bear.  But, most of the time, St. Nick simply dumped some cash in an envelope.

We had a little village that sat under our tree.  There was a train that traveled all around.  I loved to blow the whistle.  Over and over and over.  Eventually, Mom's Christmas morning headache would kick in.  From down the hall, I would hear the cry.

"Enough already!"

Despite the haze, I can tell this is another year because I look older.  My prized possession here is a Captain Kangaroo doll.  Little did I know on this day that, when I would graduate from Fordham University, Bob "Captain Kangaroo" Keeshan would be given an honorary doctorate at the same ceremony.

Damn, I remember that Zorro play set.  That kept me occupied for years.  I'd play with it upstairs.  I'd drag it downstairs.  The little pieces would be all over the house.  My grandmother would find them when she vacuumed.  Also you can see a toy tank.  We supported the military in our house.

I'm not sure if I'm still buying into the Santa Claus myth at this point.  I was for a while until a neighborhood kid/villain called Monte blew it up for me.

"You know all your Christmas toys are being hidden in our house?"

What?

The death of Santa Claus was complete when the above Zorro play set came with a stick on the bottom.

"SHOP AT EJ KORVETTES."

We were an artificial tree kind-of-family.  And Grandma's tree was so small that she managed to fit in on an end table.  

 Obviously, I got a new robe for Christmas.

And a cowboy suit, complete with guns.

And another cowboy outfit that is better suited for the Village People.  And they wonder how neuroses get started.

Dad loved to go on location.   This is the Cross County Mall in Yonkers, New York.  Decked out for Christmas when the place was still new.  PS, Gimbels has long been out of business.   That store is now a Macy's.

Every holiday season, there would be a rotation amongst our family with regard to who was hosting which celebration.  One house would do Thanksgiving, another would do Christmas Eve, and so on.  I absolutely hate those years where we would have to go someplace on Christmas Day.  I'd get all these wonderful new toys in the morning and then get dragged to certain boredom somewhere else.  This is apparently a year where we were hosting Christmas Day.  I was already dressed up and enjoying myself.  Or was it medication?

Only in my family.  A photography of me posing next to a bottle of Scotch that my uncle got for Christmas.  But, then again, my dad would always take at least one picture at every family Christmas of the booze stacked up on the kitchen table.

The photo is blurry.  So were the folks using the stuff in the picture.

I truly hated going to somebody else's house on Christmas Day.  The big problem was that all of my cousins were older and wanted little to do with me.  I wanted nothing to do with them either, but would be forced to pose for the requisite bell ringing photo.  Of course, I was also used as a prop for their antics.  Frequently involving them dressing me up in some bizarre outfit.

I have never forgotten this pain and humiliation.  Obviously.

Sometime within the following decade, these holiday celebrations stopped.  There were no more pictures.  There were way too many skirmishes.  Relatives grew inexplicably apart.  I wish it was not so.

So I look at the snapshots again from my dad's camera.   And wonder what happened to it all.

Dinner last night:  General Tso's Chicken from Chin Chin.

Classic TV Theme Song of the Month - December 2020

God bless Rankin and Bass.

Dinner last night:  Shrimp with noodles.

Your Holiday Weekend Movie Guide for December 2020

 

Well, not really.   Major releases are still being held due to the pandemic.  But, good news.   We have blog archives.

Wow, it's the 1949 Christmas movie at Radio City Music Hall!  And this year's big Yuletide movie there is....nothing.  One of life's great injustices is that you don't get to see a film in this palace anymore.  At any time of the year.

But you do get to see lots of junk at horrible multiplexes.  And here's what Hollywood had to offer during the 2010 holiday season.  You know how this works.  I comb the Los Angeles Times movie pages and give you my gut call on whether you should bother.  Most likely, you'll be staying home and watching "On The Town" on Turner Classic Movies.

The Tourist:  This mess starring Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie got some of the worst reviews in years.  The trailer was incomprehensible.  Jolie's lips stretch over two city blocks.  How many more reasons do you need to avoid this movie?

The Fighter:  This has some decent Oscar buzz because Christian Bale apparently chews up scenery like it's a box of Skittles.  But, I hear the real nuanced and great acting comes from Mark Wahlberg.  Just goes to show that a Calvin Klein underwear model does have a future.

Casino Jack:  Kevin Spacey as a Washington DC lobbyist whose schemes lead to murder and corruption.  Was Rahm Emanuel a consultant?

The Tempest:  One more version of Shakespeare's ode to storm clouds.  With an all-star cast that includes Helen Mirren, Alfred Molina, Russell Brand, and most likely Betty White.

Love and Other Drugs:  Oy vey.  The buzz that this included tons of hot sex scenes got them my ten bucks at a bargain matinee.  Trust me.  It's as sizzling as last night's fajitas.  The couple making out behind you is more interesting.  In one of the more bizarre examples of product placement, this movie is nothing but a two hour commercial for Pfizer and Viagra.  

Burlesque:  Cher.  Aguilera.  Uninterested.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - Part 1:  My streak remains intact.  I have yet to see another Harry Potter movie after the first one when I declared the story done as far as I was concerned.  

The King's Speech:  The early front runner for the Best Picture Oscar and I highly recommend it.  A fascinating slice of history that I was completely oblivious to.  Who knew that Queen Elizabeth's father was Norm Crosby?

Tron - Legacy 3D:  One of Disney's greatest live action flopper-a-roos gets a sequel almost twenty five years later.  I didn't see the first one, I won't see this one, and, in 2035, I won't see the next installment.

127 Hours:  Also tons of buzz to watch some hiker hack off his arm.  The movie is 90 minutes long, so I am guessing the 127 hours are severely edited.

All Good Things:  A true story about that son of NY real estate mogul Sanford Marks who allegedly killed his wife.  I saw it last weekend and my interest was held.  But, there were about two or three supporting roles that would have been perfect for Betty White.

Black Swan:  Some creepy thriller about a ballerina played by Natalie Portman.  The Turning Point as if it was directed by Alfred Hitchcock.  Winona Ryder has a supporting role and who hasn't been waiting for her screen return?  Okay, except for the security guards at Niemann-Marcus in Beverly Hills.

Yogi Bear:  In 3-D!   Why?????????  What's next?  A digital restoration of Crusader Rabbit??? 

How Do You Know:  Reese Witherspoon, Paul Rudd, Owen Wilson, and Jack Nicholson in what appears to be a rather banal romantic comedy.  But it was written and directed by James L. Brooks, so it might be worth a gander.

Rabbit Hole: Nicole Kidman and Aaron Eckhart as a couple struggling to stay together after their child dies.  Now that's what I call "fun holiday fare."  

The Chronicles of Narnia - The Voyage of the Dawn Treader:  The third leg of this saga, which also marks the third time I will avoid this story.  At the very least, they're getting churned out faster than Tron.

Ward No. 6: An update of Anton Chekhov's short story about one man's descent into madness.  Another film featuring Rahm Emanuel as consultant.

Little Fockers:  The third installment of the Focker family and the second one was less funny than the first one.  I'm guessing the third one will be the laughter equivalent of a sympathy card.  

Gulliver's Travels:  Oy vey all over again.  Another remake of the legendary children's tale, this time with the grossly uninteresting Jack Black undoubtedly making a lot of midget jokes.  Give me the 1939 cartoon version anyday.  Paging Gabby.

True Grit:  Normally I'd say this is a needless remake of a perfectly good classic.  But the Coen Brothers may add an interesting spin.  And I also know the guy who was Jeff Bridges' stunt double, so I'll slap on an eye patch and give it a look.

Unstoppable:  is Denzel Washington's ability to make crap.

Tangled:  Disney's holiday cartoon is a 3-D version of Rapunzel.   I'll pass and watch my favorite "Lady and the Tramp" at home.

I Love You Phillip Morris:  It's not about a cigarette addict.  Nope, it's another dreadful comedy with Jim Carrey, who's just as bad as second hand smoke.

Touching Home:  Ed Harris in a movie that clearly is not about the Mets during the second half of the 2020 season.

Get Low:  Robert Duvall in a true story about some hermit who threw himself a funeral while he was still alive.  This was out months ago but is making the rounds again because they are pushing Duvall for an Oscar nomination.  T'is the season to market an actor.  Fa la la la la la la la la.

Made in Dagenham:  A dramatization of the 1968 strike at the Ford Dagenham car plant, where female workers walked out in protest against sexual discrimination.   Time have changed.  These days, they're firing both women and men.

Dinner last night:   Taylor ham and cheese omelet.

The Finest in Christmas Record Albums

 

A bargain at $1.98.

You don't even get the good Curly.

This is some sort of a death wish.

The wurst kind of Christmas music.

Finger lickin' bad.

Nine days too many.

Enough said.

Say what?

The year disco ruined Christmas.

Obviously ran out of her SNL money.

So now you leave out for Santa Claus a cookie, some milk, and a few smokes.

Ken and Barbie come in all sorts of plastic.

Um, what does Mr. Hankey look like to you?

Dinner last night:  Salad.

This Date in History - December 16

 

Happy birthday to Lesley Stahl.  Close enough to Christmas to get shafted on presents.

714:  PEPIN OF HERSTAL, MAYOR OF THE MEROVINGIAN PALACE, DIES AT JUPILE, WHICH IS MODERN BELGIUM.   HE IS SUCCEEDED BY HIS INFANT GRANDSON.

Who issued a decree and then had his diaper changed.

1431:  HUNDRED YEARS WAR - HENRY VI OF ENGLAND IS CROWNED KING OF FRANCE AT NOTRE DAME.

I'm curious about the backstory on this.

1497:  VASCO DA GAMA ROUNDS THE CAPE OF GOOD HOPE.  NO ONE HAS DONE THIS BEFORE.

So good for him.

1653:  OLIVER CROMWELL BECOMES LORD PROTECTOR OF THE COMMONWEALTH OF ENGLAND, SCOTLAND, AND IRELAND.

Lord Protector sounds like something you would hear on Game of Thrones.  By the way, I never watched that show.

1689:  CONVENTION PARLIAMENT - THE DECLARATION OF RIGHT IS EMBODIED IN THE BILL OF RIGHTS.

Right on.

1707:  THE LAST RECORDED ERUPTION OF MOUNT FUJI IN JAPAN.

So it's way overdue.

1773:  BOSTON TEA PARTY - MEMBERS OF THE SONS OF LIBERTY DUMP CRATES OF TEA INTO BOSTON HARBOR.

The whole city must have smelled like one big Snapple bottle.

1826:  BENJAMIN EDWARDS RIDES INTO MEXICAN-CONTROLLED NACOGDOCHES, TEXAS AND DECLARES HIMSELF RULER OF FREDONIA.

Hail, hail, Fredonia!

1899:  PLAYWRIGHT NOEL COWARD IS BORN.

Private life no more.

1901:  AUTHOR MARGARET MEAD IS  BORN.

Her books sound boring.

1903:  THE TAJ MAHAL PALACE AND TOWER HOTEL IN BOMBAY OPENS.

Attention, travel agents looking for good deals.

1907:  THE AMERICAN GREAT WHITE FLEET BEGINS ITS CIRCUMNAVIGATION OF THE WORLD.

Today it would be known as the American Multi-Cultural Fleet.

1914:  WORLD WAR I - GERMAN BATTLESHIPS UNDER FRANZ VON HIPPER BOMBARD ENGLISH PORTS.

I love that name.

1922:  PRESIDENT OF POLAND GABRIEL NARUTOWICZ IS ASSASSINATED BY ELIGIUSZ NIEWIADOMSKI AT THE ZACHETA GALLERY IN WARSAW.

The poor Polish typesetter who had to put together the lettering for that newspaper headline.

1937:  THEODORE COLE AND RALPH ROES ATTEMPT TO ESCAPE THE PRISON ON ALCATRAZ ISLAND.  NEITHER IS EVER SEEN AGAIN.

My guess is that Roes wound up as fish food.  Ha.

1938:  ADOLF HITLER INSTITUTES THE CROSS OF HONOUR OF THE GERMAN MOTHER.

Sounds nice on the surface.   Don't trust him.

1941:  JOURNALIST LESLEY STAHL IS BORN.

Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick....

1942:  THE HOLOCAUST - SCHUTZSTAFFEL CHIEF HEINRICH HIMMLER ORDERS CANDIDATES FOR EXTERMINATION BE DEPORTED TO AUSCHWITZ.

Told you not to trust Hitler.

1943:  TV PRODUCER STEVEN BOCHCO IS BORN.

Truth be told, I never liked Hill Street Blues.

1944:  WORLD WAR II - THE BATTLE OF THE BULGE BEGINS.

For some people,  it continues.

1950:  KOREAN WAR - US PRESIDENT HARRY TRUMAN DECLARES A STATE OF EMERGENCY AFTER CHINESE TROOPS ENTER THE FIGHT IN SUPPORT OF COMMUNIST NORTH KOREA.

Send in the M*A*S*H* units.

1960:  A UNITED AIRLINES PLANE COLLIDES WITH A TWA AIRCRAFT OVER STATEN ISLAND, KILLING 128 PEOPLE ON BOARD AND 6 MORE ON THE GROUND.

The way the planes fly over NY, I'm surprised this doesn't happen more often.

1965:  VIETNAM WAR - GENERAL WILLIAM WESTMORELAND SENDS US SECRETARY OF DEFENSE ROBERT MCNAMARA A REQUEST FOR 243,000 MORE MEN BY THE END OF 1966.

Yeah, that will work out well.

1978:  CLEVELAND, OHIO BECOMES THE FIRST MAJOR AMERICAN CITY TO DEFAULT ON ITS FINANCIAL OBLIGATIONS SINCE THE GREAT DEPRESSION.

So what makes a depression "great?"  Poor choice of words.

1980:  FOUNDER OF KFC COLONEL SANDERS DIES.

I wonder if he was cremated.  Make that extra crispy.

1985:  PAUL CASTELLANO AND THOMAS BILOTTIE ARE SHOT DEAD ON THE ORDERS OF JOHN GOTTI.

The kind of stuff that happened on the Sopranos every season.

1995:  OFFICIAL ADOPTION OF THE NAME OF "EURO."

The trash has been here all along.

1997:  LILLIAN DISNEY DIES.

Walt's wife and see how interesting this is a little bit later.

1997:  SINGER NICOLETTE LARSON DIES.

Lotta love going her way.

2009:  BUSINESSMAN ROY DISNEY DIES.

On the same date that his aunt did.

2017:  SINGER KEELY SMITH DIES.

I think my parents had a couple of her records.  Otherwise, I got nothing.

Dinner last night:  Leftover lasagna.