Len' Juke Box of the Month - May 2024

This clip from "Ozzie and Harriet" is noteworthy and some say it was the first ever music video.

Dinner last night:  Salisbury steak in the NY apartment.

Now I've Gone to a Movie Theater Twice in 2024

 

Hollywood's long nightmare is over.   I finally went to a movie theater again.  Only the second time so far in 2024, but also the very first time this year in LA.  I bet studio accounting departments are adjusting their projections accordingly.

Fittingly, I went to see something that is a complete Hollywood experience...what I call an "extra butter" film.   Silly, ridiculous fun that you shouldn't think about for five minutes after it's ended.   But one you enjoy while you are going through it.

For those not in the know, "The Fall Guy" was originally a TV series starring Lee Majors and it was all about Hollywood stunt men.   Well, so is the screen version, but, in 2024, that means bigger and louder and more computer graphic.  You literally don't go more than five minutes without a fight scene or something blowing up.   Who cares?   You got extra butter, right?

Ryan Gosling plays the lead here and let's take this paragraph to salute what a versatile and endearing movie star he has become...playing Ken to Barbie notwithstanding.  He's one of those rare actors I would see in anything.  Additionally, his chemistry here with Emily Blunt even gives his past connections with Emma Stone a run for the money.

If you're like me and you have avoided movies for the better part of this trip, "The Fall Guy" is a good and innocuous way to end your absence.   Silly, yes?  But sometimes you need that...to justify the extra butter.

And, oh, stay and watch all of the end credits.   Lee Majors would appreciate it.

LEN'S RATING:  There-and-a-half stars.

Dinner last night:  Leftover SPO.

This Date in History - May 29

 

Happy birthday, John Hinckley Jr.  I'll bet Jodie Foster's not mentioning you in her blog today.

363:  ROMAN EMPEROR JULIAN DEFEATS THE SASSANID ARMY IN THE BATTLE OF CTESIPHON, BUT IS UNABLE TO TAKE THE CITY.

Take the city?  I'll bet they can't even pronounce it.

1167:  A ROMAN ARMY SUPPORTING POPE ALEXANDER III IS DEFEATED BY CHRISTIAN OF BUCH AND RAINALD OF DASSEL.  

And Dicker and Dicker of Beverly Hills.

1414:  COUNCIL OF CONSTANCE.

Constance who?  Towers?  Ford?  McCashin?  History needs to be more explicit.

1453:  OTTOMAN ARMIES UNDER SUITAN MEHMED II FATIH CAPTURES CONSTANTINOPLE AFTER A 53-DAY SIEGE, ENDING THE BYZANTINE EMPIRE.

I'm sure that fact was on a World History quiz that I failed.

1660:  CHARLES II IS RESTORED TO THE THRONE OF ENGLAND, SCOTLAND AND IRELAND.

With a new crown and a fresh coat of paint.

1727:  PETER II BECOMES TSAR OF RUSSIA.

Tstupendous.

1790:  RHODE ISLAND BECOMES THE LAST OF THE ORIGINAL US COLONIES TO RATIFY THE CONSTITUTION AND IS ADMITTED AS THE 13TH STATE.

How else can people from Connecticut get to Boston?

1848:  WISCONSIN IS ADMITTED AS THE 30TH STATE.

Do we have to take in all those Cheeseheads?

1852:  JENNY LIND LEFT NEW YORK AFTER HER WILDLY SUCCESSFUL TWO-YEAR AMERICAN TOUR.

The Justin Bieber of the 19th Century.

1861:  THE HONG KONG CHAMBER OF COMMERCE IS FOUNDED IN HONG KONG.

Clever how they came up with that name.

1886: CHEMIST JOHN PEMBERTON PLACES HIS FIRST AD FOR COCA COLA IN THE ATLANTA JOURNAL.

I'd like to teach the world to drink.

1903:  COMEDIAN BOB HOPE IS BORN.

But I wanna tell ya.  Keep reading for a very fun historical fact that I never knew until I started writing up this date.

1913:  IGOR STRAVINSKY'S BALLET "THE RITE OF SPRING" RECEIVES ITS PREMIERE PERFORMANCE IN PARIS, PROVOKING A RIOT.

What?  The tulips got upset??

1917:  PRESIDENT JOHN F. KENNEDY IS BORN.

And here it is, gang.  Who ever knew that Kennedy and Hope had the same    birthday?  And both of them slept with actresses named Marilyn.

1919:  ALBERT EINSTEIN'S THEORY OF GENERAL RELATIVITY IS CONFIRMED.  

I didn't even know it was Catholic.

1931:  MICHELE SCHIRRU, A US CITIZEN, IS EXECUTED BY AN ITALIAN MILITARY FIRING SQUAD FOR INTENT TO KILL MUSSOLINI.

Had she lived and married astronaut Wally Schirra, she would have been Michele Schirru Schirra.

1938:  FORMER BASEBALL COMMISSIONER FAY VINCENT IS BORN.

You think his folks wanted a girl?

1942:  ACTOR JOHN BARRYMORE DIES.

And a few of his actors cart his body to saloons all over Los Angeles.  A true story.

1942:  BING CROSBY RECORDS IRVING BERLIN'S SONG "WHITE CHRISTMAS."  

Great idea.  With it being May 29 and all.

1947:  ACTOR ANTHONY GEARY IS BORN.

He was on General Hospital longer than some people have been alive.

1951:  ACTRESS FANNY BRICE DIES.

Funny girl.  Even funnier face.

1953: EDMUND HILLARY AND SHERPA TENZING NORGAY BECOME THE FIRST PEOPLE TO REACH THE SUMMIT OF MOUNT EVEREST.

Something tells me Hillary made the sherpa go first.  Just to check the footing.

1955:  ASSASSIN JOHN HINCKLEY JR. IS BORN.

You talkin' to me?

1958:  ACTRESS ANNETTE BENING IS BORN.

The future Mrs. Warren Beatty.  

1972:  BASEBALL PLAYER/SPY MOE BERG DIES.

I like that occupation mix.  I wonder if that's what he wrote on his income tax returns.

1973:  TOM BRADLEY IS ELECTED THE FIRST BLACK MAYOR OF LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA.  

And I believe the last.

1979:  ACTRESS MARY PICKFORD DIES.

How are those curls working out for you now?

1988:  US PRESIDENT RONALD REAGAN BEGINS HIS FIRST VISIT TO THE SOVIET UNION WHEN HE ARRIVES FOR A SUMMIT WITH MIKHAIL GORBACHEV.

Mr. Gorbachev, your wall is toast.

1990:  THE RUSSIAN PARLIAMENT ELECTS BORIS YELTSIN PRESIDENT OF THE RUSSIAN SFSR.

I really wish Mrs. Yeltsin's first name was Natasha.

1997:  TV ANNOUNCER GEORGE FENNEMAN DIES.

You bet your death.

1998:  POLITICIAN BARRY GOLDWATER DIES.

Misunderstood.

2001:  THE US SUPREME COURT RULES THAT DISABLED GOLFER CASEY MARTIN CAN USE A CART TO RIDE IN TOURNAMENTS.

Good.  Otherwise, he's still on the first hole.

2004:  LAWYER ARCHIBALD COX DIES.

The only good lawyer is....well, you know.

2008:  ACTOR HARVEY KORMAN DIES.

I once lit his candle at a Christmas Eve church service.  

2010:  ACTOR DENNIS HOPPER DIES.

I never lit his candle.  Ever.

2015:  ACTRESS BETSY PALMER DIES.

Not a secret any more.

2015:  THE NEW ONE WORLD TRADE CENTER OPENS.

Take that, Wamsutta Heads!!

2021:  SINGER BJ THOMAS DIES.

Those raindrops must have been like anvils.

Dinner last night:  Leftover Guinness stew.

Hollywood Then and Now - May 2024

 A visit to the Cunningham house from "Happy Days"...exterior version.  Then and now as it still exists on Cahuenga Boulevard.

Dinner last night:  Hot dog at the Landmark on Sunset.

Monday Morning Video Laugh - May 27, 2024

Happy Memorial Day.  This never gets old.   Biden asking a guy in a wheelchair to stand.

Dinner last night:  Orange chicken.

The Sunday Memory Drawer - Memorial Day Memories

 

Every Memorial Day, I am amazed.

I drive past the Los Angeles Veterans Memorial Cemetery frequently.  But, on this one weekend every May, I am astounded to see all the graves above.  Almost overnight, adored by an American flag.  How the heck does this happen?  I mean, there have to be thousands and thousands of graves here.

I eventually got the answer.  I happen to be driving by the place one Saturday and saw dozens and dozens of Boy Scouts and Cub Scouts.  All scampering up and down the rows of tombstones, yet respectfully stopping to decorate each one with its own Stars and Stripes.

If this is indeed a tradition for this cemetery, it's a beautiful one.  The youngest Americans saluting perhaps some of the oldest.

For me, Memorial Day was more than just remembering our nation's soldiers.  It's a time where you should recall all those who has passed on.

But, then again, in my family, every Sunday was Memorial Day.  Because there was no more likely Sunday activity in our house than prepping for that day's sojourn to the cemetery.  

You'd see the signs emerging right after Grandma and Grandpa had cleared their Sunday dinner dishes.  Usually by 1PM.  I'd look out our upstairs kitchen window.  Grandma would be by her flower bed.  Snip, snip, snip.  Then she'd move onto the lilac tree.  It wasn't always in bloom.  But, if it was...

Snip, snip, snip.

Meanwhile, there would the sound of tools being moved in the garage.  Grandpa came out with a shovel, a water can, and a weed whacker.  They'd get tossed into the back of his car.

Yep, they were headed to the cemetery.  To visit everybody.  

Our family was spread out over two places.  The humongous Woodlawn Cemetery in the Bronx.  If you were there, you must have died before 1950.  The real oldtimers were planted there.  A foray to Woodlawn often became an event that even my parents attached themselves to.  Smack in the middle of this place was a duck pond.  And a wonderful spot for my dad to play with his Argus Technicolor camera.

This duck feeding thing was a big deal.  Mom dressed up for it.

Personally, I was bored by the treks through Woodlawn.  I never knew the relatives there. Cousins who had died of sinus infections in the pre-antibiotic days of the 30s. One young nephew who had accidentally stabbed himself to death while slicing some pork chops in the butcher shop. 

They were ashes and dust long before I popped out.  To keep my interest level up on those afternoons, my father would always drive me over for a history lesson.  It seems some rich lady back in 1912 had erected a monument to all those who sunk with the Titanic.  

It was a memorial, but I'd attack it like a jungle gym.  I'd be running like a lunatic all over it until my dad would invariably put an end to the mayhem.

"Get off there before you break your neck and we have to leave you here."

Oh.

These cemetery tours were almost robotic for my grandparents.  They had their set routine as adjunct gardeners for all our dead relatives.

Fill the water can from a nozzle that often just dripped liquid.

Pull out all the weeds that had spring up.

Sometimes, real surgery was needed if you showed up and there was a gaping hole in the grave.

"Uh, oh, Uncle Albert has sunk."

Just like the Titanic.

And that's why another item that was frequently loaded into Grandpa's car trunk was a big bag of dirt.  Handy to fill the holes that were ruining Tante Somebody's eternal rest.

Of course, if this was a Sunday to visit the more recent deceased family members, we'd head north to Ferncliff.

Located on a quiet hill in the even quieter hamlet of Hartsdale, New York, Ferncliff Cemetery is the eternal home of lots of famous people. 

Songwriter Harold Arlen, James Baldwin, ice cream meglomaniac Tom Carvel, Joan Crawford, Basil Rathbone, Toots Shor, Ed Sullivan and his orchestra leader Ray Bloch, director Preston Sturges, Moss Hart and his wife Kitty Carlisle Hart, renowned troublemaker Malcolm X, Oscar Hammerstein, Moms Mabley, and Judy Garland. Beatle John Lennon was cremated there. The list goes on and on and on. 

The place includes also a whole passel of my relatives. And the relatives of several good friends of mine.

And ultimately my own parents.

Indeed, my mom would be happy to know that her top floor studio apartment/niche is a mere three dozen footsteps away from Miss Garland, whom I would have allegedly be named after. If I, of course, was a girl. Not that gender ever made a difference to Judy. 

But, I digress...

We'd know we were headed to Ferncliff on a Sunday if you heard Grandma make the following announcement.

"Come on, let's go see Uncle Fritz."

The eight-year-old comedian in me could not resist the witty retort.  Yeah, but he can't see you. Ha ha. 

My grandmother didn't find the funny in funny.

"Don't be fresh."

We'd tool up to Ferncliff and there was a set order in which folks would be "visited." On our first stop, Grandma would survey the grounds like General Patton.  If a grave needed attention, she would call our.

 ”Pop, bring me the shears!”
 
And then they would spend an hour manicuring the grounds while I played hopscotch on the bronze nameplates all around me. And then get scolded for that.
 
”Don’t walk on them. That’s where their head is.”
 
Huh?

I'd often wander aimlessly across the street to the big building where everybody had indoor places to repose.  Why?  I have no idea because that mausoleum always managed to give me the creeps.  There would be eerie, somber music that was piped into that joint.  I walked through there wearing imaginary blinders, but always stopping for a second to look at those personalized family crypts.  Some were decorated to look like living rooms with even kids' toys on the floor.

Audible scream followed by my feet running as fast as they could.

There was one Ferncliff grave that my father scared the shit out of me with. It seems some real jerk had a bust made of his head. When he was buried, the bust was placed under the nameplate and you could lift it up to look down. 

One day, my father said, “come on and say hello to Uncle Charlie.” Not knowing the horror to come and being a dumb kid, I did so. Uncle Charlie looking up from his resting place. 

Audible scream all over again! 

Nightmares for a week.

Thanks, Dad.

When the afternoon was over, Grandma would pronounce the end as if she had finished a major project.

"Everybody's fine.  Good kinuck."

I think "kinuck" meant "enough."

As we would drive home, Grandma would often turn to me and ask if I would visit her in the same way every Sunday.

Yeah, sure.

As only it could make sense, my grandparents were buried in Woodlawn Cemetery with the rest of the older folks.  They picked their own plot.  Right next to the fence with the cars racing by on Webster Avenue outside.  I asked them once why she had picked this spot.

"We want to be able to watch all the cars go by."

Oh. 

I don't visit cemeteries every Sunday.  In lieu of pulling weeds, I prefer to remember all here.  On this blog.

Where they still live.

Dinner last night: Chicken McNuggets.

Classic Movie Trailer of the Month - May 2024

 So hard to believe that this movie is 40 years old this month.

Dinner last night:  Double double from In N Out.

Meeting Your Fellow Human Beings on Earth

Some more family photos that were better off left out of the album.

I'm not sure what's worse here. The fact that Dad is wearing incredibly short pants. Or that Mom's head actually can be easily detachable.

A fun night at the Renaissance Fair.. Obviously, if you looked like Wilford Brimley, you got in free.

Some lost Kamala Harris relatives. Cousins Shecky and Quanisha.

I'm sure her mom and dad love having this on the fireplace mantel. Hey, watch your hand, buddy.

The end result of having sex and doing LSD at the same time.

Even I have nothing to say about this one...

Is that a tree limb or is Dad that impressive???

Dinner last night: Salad.

32 Minus One

There's always something new going on with my body, which is breaking down like a 1955 Packard.  The knees have both been replaced.   The left hip is starting to fill up with arthritis.

And now the mouth.   A tooth that had a filling decades ago gave way to wear and tear.   It split right down the middle and is sadly not crownable.   So here comes my first implant.   Friends of mine have gone this route before.  But it's all new to me.

The first step was the tooth extraction.  Now I wait four months for it to heal so a post can be grafted onto the jawbone.  Then several months later, I get the new tooth.  And my dentist gets to remodel his kitchen with my money.

In the meantime, I've got a space on my upper case right side.  Except there is something called a flipper.  See above.  It slips in and out with ease and I can chew with it.

It will serve its purpose over the next nine months.  But I'm still not going for new headshots.

Dinner last night:  Had a big lunch so nothing really.

This Date in History - May 22

 

Happy birthday, Barbara Parkins.  Talk about the first women to jumpstart your hormones.  Here's one who did that for me.

334 BC:  THE MACEDONIAN ARMY OF ALEXANDER THE GREAT DEFEATS DARIUS III OF PERSIA.

There were three Darius' in Persia.  There were only two on Bewitched.

853:  A BYZANTINE FLEET SACKS AND DESTROYS UNDEFENDED DAMIETTA IN EGYPT.

Undefended?  The first ever incidence of bullying recorded in history.

1176:  THE HASHSHASHIN ATTEMPT TO MURDER SALADIN NEAR ALEPPO.

The Hashshashin should get addicted on hashish.  Then say that five times fast.

1200:  KING JOHN OF ENGLAND AND KING PHILIP II OF FRANCE SIGN THE TREATY OF LE GOULET.

Did Carol Lawrence know about this?

1377:  POPE GREGORY XI ISSUES FIVE PAPAL BULLS TO DENOUNCE THE DOCTRINES OF THEOLOGIAN JOHN WYCLIFFE.

And that's no.....okay, you finish the line.

1762:  SWEDEN AND PRUSSIA SIGN THE TREATY OF HAMBURG.

With onions and relish.

1802:  FIRST LADY MARTHA WASHINGTON DIES.

She and hubby shared wigs and doubled their wardrobe.

1807:  A GRAND JURY INDICTS FORMER VICE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES AARON BURR ON A CHARGE OF TREASON.

Which is why you don't see Aaron Burr's photo on any currency.

1816:  A MOB IN CAMBRIDGESHIRE, ENGLAND, RIOTS OVER HIGH UNEMPLOYMENT.

And this is new how?

1826:  HMS BEAGLE DEPARTS ON ITS FIRST VOYAGE.

My favorite breed of dog.  Just saying.

1849:  POLITICIAN LOUIS PERRIER IS BORN.

Insert your favorite sparkling water joke here.

1859:  AUTHOR SIR ARTHUR CONAN DOYLE IS BORN.

I have read every single Sherlock Holmes book he wrote.  Just saying.

1863:  DURING THE AMERICAN CIVIL WAR, UNION FORCES LAY SIEGE TO THE CONFEDERATE-CONTROLLED PORT HUDSON, LOUISIANA.

For a war that lasted only four years, there sure were a lot of important battle places.

1885:  AUTHOR VICTOR HUGO DIES.

The guy who wrote about the seedy part of France.  Oh, wait, all of France is seedy.

1906:  THE WRIGHT BROTHERS ARE GRANTED A US PATENT FOR THEIR FLYING MACHINE.

Those magnificent men.

1907:  SIR LAURENCE OLIVIER IS BORN.

He was married to Vivien Leigh.  No dummy was he.

1910:  TV ANNOUNCER JOHNNY OLSON IS BORN.

Come on down!

1922:  TV PRODUCER QUINN MARTIN IS BORN.

A Mother Martin Production.

1924:  SINGER CHARLES AZNAVOUR IS BORN.

And he's still alive so I guess it's true what they say about drinking lots of wine.

1926:  CHIANG KAI-SHEK REPLACES COMMUNISTS IN KUOMINTANG CHINA.

Replaced them with what?

1927"  ACTOR MICHAEL CONSTANTINE IS BORN.

Room 222!

1930:  POLITICIAN HARVEY MILK IS BORN.

His expiration date was 1978.

1938:  ACTOR RICHARD BENJAMIN IS BORN.

One of those celebrities that I constantly see all over town.  

1939:  GERMANY AND ITALY SIGN THE PACT OF STEEL.

Unholy alliance indeed.

1942:  ACTRESS BARBARA PARKINS IS BORN.

What time does the bus leave for Peyton Place?

1942:  MEXICO ENTERS WORLD WAR II ON THE SIDE OF THE ALLIES.

I didn't know that leaf blowers were considered weapons.

1942:  TED WILLIAMS OF THE BOSTON RED SOX ENLISTS IN THE US MARINES.

I can't wait for that intra-barracks softball game.

1943:  BASEBALL PLAYER TOMMY JOHN IS BORN.

And yet he's better known for having surgery.

1947:  US PRESIDENT HARRY TRUMAN SIGNS AN ANTI-COMMUNISM ACT INTO LAW THAT WILL LATER BE CALLED THE TRUMAN DOCTRINE.

And what else would you have called that doctrine??

1960:  AN EARTHQUAKE MEASURING 9.5 HITS SOUTHERN CHILE.  IT IS THE MOST POWERFUL EARTHQUAKE EVER RECORDED.

Chile?  Total property damage:  $4,57.

1961:  ACTRESS JOAN DAVIS DIES.

I Buried Joan.

1964:  US PRESIDENT LYNDON JOHNSON ANNOUNCES THE GOALS OF HIS GREAT SOCIETY TO BRING AN END TO POVERTY AND RACIAL INJUSTICE IN AMERICA.

A society that has yet to get past the level of mediocre.

1969:  APOLLO 10'S LUNAR MODULE FLIES WITHIN 8.4 MILES OF THE MOON'S SURFACE.

Close, but not yet a giant step for mankind.

1972:  ACTRESS MARGARET RUTHERFORD DIES.

Solve this, Miss Marple.

1975:  BASEBALL PLAYER LEFTY GROVE DIES.

I don't have a single funny thing to say about that.

1980:  PAC-MAN VIDEO GAME IS RELEASED.

And there goes the attention span of millions of children,.

1990:  MICROSOFT RELEASES WINDOWS 3.0.

And what number are we up to now?

1990:  BOXER ROCKY GRAZIANO DIES.

Now he'll get to meet the somebody up there that likes him.

1992:  AFTER 30 YEARS, JOHNNY CARSON HOSTS THE TONIGHT SHOW FOR THE LAST TIME.

One of the sadder days of my life.

1998:  ACTOR JOHN DEREK DIES.

A line forms for those making condolence calls to the widow.

1998:  A FEDERAL JUDGE RULES THAT US SECRET SERVICE AGENTS CAN BE COMPELLED TO TESTIFY BEFORE A GRAND JURY CONCERNING THE MONICA LEWINSKY SCANDAL.

Was this big news at one time?

2001:  ACTOR WHITMAN MAYO DIES.

Held.

2002:  IN WASHINGTON DC, THE REMAINS OF THE MISSING CHANDRA LEVY ARE FOUND.

Which means she's no longer missing.

2003:  IN FORT WORTH, TEXAS, ANNIKA SORENSTAM BECOMES THE FIRST WOMAN TO PLAY THE PGA TOUR IN 58 YEARS.

I thought that was Dinah Shore.

2017:  22 PEOPLE ARE KILLED AT AN ARIANA GRANDE CONCERT IN MANCHESTER, ENGLAND.

Stubhub didn't warn us about this.

2017:  US PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP VISITS THE CHURCH OF THE HOLY SEPULCHRE IN JERUSALEM AND BECOMES THE FIRST SITTING PRESIDENT TO VISIT THE WESTERN WALL.

Although there were a few who did it while standing.

Dinner last night:  Chicken salad.

Len's Recipe of the month - May 2024

 

It's getting so I will try any recipe if my YouTube chefs Laura Vitale and Sip & Feast post one.   So, back in March, both of them shared a recipe for Irish Stew.  Perfect timing for St. Patrick's Day.   I missed the holiday, but I did make this dish by the middle of May.

The big drawing card with this is you pour a bottle of Guinness Extra Stout into the dutch oven.  The liquid is the key to the whole thing, but there are some tricks you need to incorporate.

This is a stew so the first thing you need to do is fry up some bacon (six slices chopped) at the bottom of your dutch oven.  I used chopped pancetta and that worked as you need to render some fat for the bottom.  After five minutes, remove the bacon/pancetta.   

Season with salt and pepper two pounds of cubed chuck beef.   Sear it in some of the liquid left behind by the bacon.  Sear both sides and then remove.

To the same damn dutch oven, throw in a couple of squirts of EVO.   Add the following.

Three sliced carrots.

Two sliced stalks of celery.

One sliced onion.

Four minced cloves of garlic.

Let the veggies get translucent for five to eight minutes.  Then fold in about a cup of tomato paste.  Then stir in a 1/4 cup of flour,  Make sure it gets absorbed into the veggies.

At this point, you will find a lot of brown bits on the bottom of the dutch oven.  To get them released, it's time to pour in your bottle of Guinness.  With a square spoon, scrape up the brown bits

Now add two cups of beef broth.  For best results, get yourself some of that Better Than Boullion stuff.  Add a tablespoon of thyme and several squirts of Worcestershire sauce.  Return the beef and the bacon to the pot.  Slice and quarter four to five Yukon Gold potatoes.  Add them.

Now there are two schools of thought on cooking.   Some say the oven.  I chose the stovetop and let it simmer for four hours.   Midway through, I removed the cover and added two curveballs.  I added two tablespoons of butter and two tablespoons of brown sugar, which will counteract the bitterness of the Guinness.

If you find like me that your stew is a little soupy, simply add a quick slurry and cook uncovered for about an hour.

Remember this recipe next March.

Dinner last night:  Leftover of the above.

Monday Morning Video Laugh - May 20, 2024

 And this is why Peloton is going out of business.

Dinner last night:  Irish Guinness Stew.

The Sunday Memory Drawer - Springtime for HItler and Prom Dates

 

Aw, these lucky stiffs.   They got to go to prom.

Okay, here's how old I am.   I remember when you asked somebody to THE prom.   When did it become a stand alone word?   Was this something adopted in China?   It sounds like an incomplete sentence.

THE Prom Season is probably winding down and that psychological torture can be put away for another year.   A few years back, when I was at a Dodger game this time of year, I kept seeing messages pop up on the scoreboard.

"Ashlee, will you go to prom with me?  Josh."

This would happen over and over.   With no children in my house, I had no clue what this meant.   My childhood best friend Leo explained it to me as he was going through this phenomenon in his home.   Prom invitations to a girl must be executed in a very public way.   Over school P.A. systems.   Written in the sky.  On the Dodger Stadium Diamondvision.

Oh.

I wondered just how crushing it would be to go through this process and then be publicly humiliated by a "no" response.   Ouch.  So, as I have long suspected, the prom ritual might be the single biggest reason why people go into analysis later in life.

I am happy to say that I was spared all of this drama.   For the first time in my entire high school tenure, I was actually delighted to go to a predominantly Black school. We didn't even have an official prom. The event essentially became twenty Black couples going out to the Apollo Theater in Harlem. 

As I was neither Black or a couple, I did not qualify.

I've heard nothing but horror stories from people who actually had one. Vomit on tuxedos. Dates falling asleep in public places. Coming with one date and leaving with another. Not getting invited. The male flip side of that. Inviting somebody in a public forum who tells you to get lost.  It's way too early in life to have these pressures thrust upon you.

Why don't high schools host one big "dress-up" party? Pair off there if you so desire. Or just hang with your friends and make fun of the teachers.

Believe me, the trauma of formal affairs doesn't get any better with age. Years and years after my non-prom, I was working at an entertainment company that had a premiere broadcast held at, of all places, the Apollo Theater. Now, keep in mind that Harlem is just a place I ride a train through. But, this night was a gala affair. And it was black tie and date required. Luckily, this was a particular rare moment in time where I could easily comply on the latter.

The irony didn't pass on me that I was finally going to the Mount Vernon High senior prom at the Apollo Theater. And, even as a adult, there was enormous nonsense attached. What to wear? What color tuxedo? What tie that would not clash with the outfit of said date? Weeks and weeks of bullshit. 

By the time the evening arrived, I was mentally exhausted and would have preferred to spent the night at home watching "Cotton Comes to Harlem" on HBO. And, of course, I accidentally ripped something off the back of said date's dress, which created more chaos and hysteria than Donald Trump's election.

At least, I didn't throw up. But, thinking of it all today makes me want to.

Heck, I'm still bothered that it's no longer referred to as THE prom.

Dinner last night:  Teriyaki chicken lo mein.

Classic TV Theme Song of the Month - May 2024

In honor of composer Henry Mancini's upcoming 100th birthday, let's enjoy a rare TV theme he did.   A beautiful one, at that.

Dinner last night:  Ham and gruyere grilled sandwich from Clementine's.

The 2024 Senior Prom Album

 

Well, this one is from 2010, but who cares?  These outfits never got into style.

And this one might be from 1827. Abraham Lincoln, Springfield High.

Formal wear by Hefty Garbage Bags.

Even the Dukes of Hazzard had a senior prom.

Love is blue....and so is our wardrobe.

Your same-sex prom photo.

I guess he couldn't get Pam Grier for a date.

Poor dog.

Who did their hair?  Benjamin Moore?

What happens when two prom dates can't find a babysitter for their children.

Dinner last night:  Hamburger.

Well, The Very Idea...

 

Well, here we go.  Making good on my pledge to be less snobbish about movies I see on streams for reviewing purposes.   And this new viewpoint has an ignoble start with "The Idea of You," which is essentially a Hallmark movie without the snow.

Remember Anne Hathaway and all those ingenue princess roles?   Well, she's hit the proverbial Lancome wall.  Now in her 40s and loaded with Botox.   And this, of course, serves her well as she plays a 40 year-old divorced art dealer living with her teenage daughter in Los Angeles.  Oh, how the age thing weaves its nasty curves.

So, as any good mom would do, Anne takes her daughter and her friends off to Coachella for a few days.  She steps into a trailer which she thinks is a bathroom only to discover that it's the dressing room of the 24 year-old lead singer of some boy band named August Moon.  Embarrassment ensues, of course.   But, you need one of these "meet cute" moments to bring the most unlikely of romantic couples together.  If you like to cringe in public, this is the movie for you.

Conveniently, the kid goes off to sleepaway camp which allows Mom to do her own sleepaways in London, Rome, and Paris in full view of paparazzi.   In this film, more photogs follow this couple than did Diana and Dodi Fayed.  

To say this is a formula movie is redundant.  It follows the template of every single movie you would see on Hallmark.   First kiss at the 56 minute mark, followed by 14 and a half minutes of sex.   Then the inevitable breakup which, at the film's conclusion, winds up with the standard epilogue "Five Years Later."

The only thing you haven't seen before in "The Idea of You" is this much Botox into one woman's chin.  Somewhere underneath it all is what we remember as Anne Hathaway.  

Truth be told, you could probably find worse ways to waste your time then with this romantic tempest in a tea pot.   Just try to stop reciting the dialogue ten minutes before it is said.

LEN'S RATING:  Two-and-a-half stars.

Dinner last night: Some ice cream as I had a big lunch.

This Date in History - May 15

 

Happy birthday, Wavy Gravy.  Who, you say?  I don't know, I say.  But his name showed up on the May 15 birthday list and, with a name like that, it's impossible not to include him.

392:  EMPEROR VALENTINIAN II IS ASSASSINATED WHILE ADVANCING INTO GAUL AGAINST THE FRANKISH USURPER ARBOGAST.  HE IS FOUND HANGING IN HIS RESIDENCE.

What was he hanging from?  I mean, back then, there were no overhead light fixtures.

589:  KING AUTHARI MARRIES THEODELINDA, DAUGHTER OF THE BAVARIAN DUKE GARIBALD I.  

Sentences like that are why I always hated world history in high school.

1252:  POPE INNOCENT IV ISSUES THE PAPAL BULL AD EXTIRPANDA, WHICH AUTHORIZES, BUT ALSO LIMITS, THE TORTURE OF HERETICS IN THE MEDIEVAL INQUISITION.

He's Innocent...and trying to keep it that way.

1525:  INSURGENT PEASANTS LED BY PASTOR THOMAS MUENTZER WERE DEFEATED AT THE BATTLE OF FRANKENHAUSEN, ENDING THE GERMAN PEASANTS' WAR IN THE HOLY ROMAN EMPIRE.

#OccupyFrankenhausen.

1536:  ANNE BOLEYN, QUEEN OF ENGLAND, STANDS TRIAL IN LONDON ON CHARGES OF TREASON, ADULTERY, AND INCEST.  SHE IS CONDEMNED TO DEATH.

She was a head of her time.

1602:  BARTHOLOMEW GOSNOLD BECOMES THE FIRST RECORDED EUROPEAN TO SEE CAPE COD.  

In May.  He beat the summer rates.

1648:  THE TREATY OF WESTPHALIA IS SIGNED.

I love their ham.

1718:  JAMES PUCKLE, A LONDON LAWYER, PATENTS THE WORLD'S FIRST MACHINE GUN.

Elliot Ness thanks you.

1791:  MAXIILIEN ROBESPIERRE PROPOSES THE SELF-DENYING ORDINANCE.

Self denying what?  Umm, maybe I shouldn't ask.

1817: THE FIRST US PRIVATE MENTAL HEALTH HOSPITAL, THE ASYLUM FOR THE RELIEF OF PERSONS DEPRIVED OF THE USE OF THEIR REASON, OPENS IN PHILADELPHIA.

That's a long way to say "nut house."

1858:  OPENING OF THE PRESENT ROYAL OPERA HOUSE IN COVENT GARDEN, LONDON.

Eliza Doolittle needed some place to sell her flowers.

1862:  PRESIDENT ABRAHAM LINCOLN SIGNS A BILL INTO LAW CREATING THE US BUREAU OF AGRICULTURE.  

Good, he freed the farmers.

1869:  IN NEW YORK, SUSAN B. ANTHONY AND ELIZABETH CADY STANTON FORM THE NATIONAL WOMAN SUFFRAGE ASSOCIATION.

And when do they give equal rights to their husbands?

1886:  POET EMILY DICKINSON DIES.

She should have stayed in bed because now she's dead.

1902:  POLITICIAN RICHARD DALEY IS BORN.

Any politician in Chicago is born automatically corrupt.

1905:  ACTOR JOSEPH COTTEN IS BORN.

No, he did not invent the Q-Tip.

1905:  BUSINESSMAN ABRAHAM ZAPRUDER IS BORN.

Back and to the left....back and to the left.

1905:  LAS VEGAS, NEVADA IS FOUNDED.

Now Siegfried and Roy have someplace to go.

1909:  ACTOR JAMES MASON IS BORN.

A star is born.

1918:  COUNTRY SINGER EDDY ARNOLD IS BORN.

Back in the day when country singers sounded like...well, country singers.

1928:  MICKEY MOUSE PREMIERES IN HIS FIRST CARTOON "PLANE CRAZY."

And still his fur is jet black.  He must use "Just for Mice."

1935:  THE MOSCOW METRO IS OPENED TO THE PUBLIC.

I can't think of a worse place to be than Russia during rush hour.

1936:  ACTRESS ANNA MARIA ALBERGHETTI IS BORN.

With meatballs.

1936:  CLOWN WAVY GRAVY IS BORN.

And I still don't know who the hell he is.

1940:  SINGER LAINIE KAZAN IS BORN.

She always plays a fussy old Jew.  Probably because she is.

1940:  MCDONALD'S OPENS ITS FIRST RESTAURANT IN SAN BERNARDINO, CALIFORNIA.

Two Served.

1942:   IN THE US, A BILL CREATED THE WOMEN'S ARMY AUXILIARY CORPS IS SIGNED INTO LAW.

They're called WAACs and that sure describes any girl I ever knew.

1948:  FOLLOWING THE DEMISE OF THE BRITISH MANDATE OF PALESTINE, EGYPT, TRANSJORDAN, LEBANON, SYRIA, IRAQ, AND SAUDI ARABIA INVADE ISRAEL THUS STARTING THE 1948 ARAB-ISRAELI WAR.

Talk about a pile-on.

1953:  BASEBALL STAR GEORGE BRETT IS BORN.

Without the aid of any pine tar in the birth canal.

1963:  THE LAUNCH OF THE FINAL MERCURY MISSION, MERCURY-ATLAS 9 WITH ASTRONAUT GORDON COOPER ON BOARD.  HE BECOMES THE FIRST AMERICAN TO SPEND MORE THAN A DAY IN SPACE.

On that very day, I was attending my first ever baseball game at Yankee Stadium.  I remember this because the scoreboard kept telling us how many orbits Cooper had completed.

1969:  CALIFORNIA GOVERNOR RONALD REAGAN HAS AN IMPROMPTU STUDENT PARK OWNED BY UC-BERKELEY FENCED OFF FROM STUDENT ANTI-WAR PROTESTORS IN A RIOT CALLED BLOODY TUESDAY.

There he goes again.

1972:  IN LAUREL, MARYLAND, ARTHUR BREMER SHOOTS AND PARALYZES ALABAMA GOVERNOR GEORGE WALLACE WHILE HE IS CAMPAIGNING TO BECOME PRESIDENT.

If he was aiming for the head, he missed.

1994:  ACTOR GILBERT ROLAND DIES.

The tightrope walker in "The Big Circus."  

2003:  SINGER JUNE CARTER CASH DIES.

Cash is no longer king.  Or queen.

2007:  PASTOR JERRY FALWELL DIES.

See ya, dirt bag.

2008:  CALIFORNIA BECOMES THE SECOND US STATE AFTER MASSACHUSETTS TO LEGALIZE SAME-SEX MARRIAGE.

When do the polygamy activists get their day in court?  

2015:  FOOTBALL STAR GARO YEPREMIAN DIES.

He kicked...the bucket.

2020:  ACTOR FRED WILLARD DIES.

Brilliant and always underrated,

Dinner last night:  Salad.