When Fotomat Was King

 

The latest marketing campaign from the NRA.

Hey, Mom.  It's a freakin' family portrait.  How about running a comb through??

 Every child tastes better on a Ritz.

 Seventeen years and two bottles of vodka later.

The low budget reboot of "Charlie's Angels."

Over here.  No, over here, dear.   Over here.  Oh, never mind.

"You've met my daughters, the Maguire Sisters?"

Thank God they refrained from doing the breastfeeding re-enactment.

Nobody likes a stepmother.

Dinner last night:  Taylor Ham on English muffin.

Hollywood Then and Now - January 2025

 

Frankly, the "then" wasn't that long ago.   Here you see the Altadena mansion that was used for exteriors as Deborah Vance's home on "Hacks."  They had pretty much finished filming there for Season 4.

Assuming there's a Season 5, they will have to do a real estate recast.   Or use old footage.  Because...well, you may have heard about the fires out here.

Yeah, we can't have nice things any more.

Dinner last night:  Leftover meat loaf.

This Date in History - January 29

 

Happy birthday to Katharine Ross.   I've seen her recently and she doesn't look like this picture any more.   But, then again, who does?

757:  AN LUSHAN, LEADER OF A REVOLT AGAINST THE TANG DYNASTY AND EMPEROR OF YAN, IS MURDERED BY HIS OWN SON.

Tang Dynasty?   Do I have a coupon from them?  Or am I confused?

904:  SERGIUS III COMES OUT OF RETIREMENT TO TAKE OVER THE PAPACY FROM THE DEPOSED ANTIPOPE.

Is there such a thing as an Unclepope?

1834:  US PRESIDENT ANDREW JACKSON ORDERS FIRST USE OF FEDERAL SOLDIERS TO SUPPRESS A LABOR DISPUTE.

And won't be the last.

1845:  "THE RAVEN" BY EDGAR ALLAN POE IS PUBLISHED FOR THE FIRST TIME.

Book report due on February 5, 1845.

1861:  KANSAS IS ADMITTED AS THE 34TH US STATE.

Well, Dorothy and Toto have to live someplace.

1880:  ACTOR W.C. FIELDS IS BORN.

Whipsnade, whipsnade.

1886:  KARL BENZ PATENTS THE FIRST SUCCESSFUL GAS-DRIVEN AUTOMOBILE.

Somebody get Mercedes on the horn.

1900:  THE AMERICAN LEAGUE IS ORGANIZED WITH EIGHT FOUNDING TEAMS.

And no designated hitter, I might add.

1913:  ACTOR VICTOR MATURE IS BORN.

He lived for 86 years so he did live up to his last name.

1916:  DURING WORLD WAR I, PARIS IS FIRST BOMBED BY GERMAN ZEPPELINS.

And it won't be the last.

1918:  THE BOLSHEVIK RED ARMY, ON ITS WAY TO BESIEGE KIEV, IS MET BY A SMALL GROUP OF MILITARY STUDENTS.

At what point does the chicken get to Kiev?

1918:  ACTOR JOHN FORSYTHE IS BORN.

Bachelor Father!

1923:  AUTHOR PADDY CHAYEFSKY IS BORN.

I'm mad as hell and I'm going to take it anymore!

1936:  THE FIRST INDUCTEES INTO THE BASEBALL HALL OF FAME ARE ANNOUNCED.

And they were Ty Cobb, Walter Johnson, Christy Matthewson, Honus Wagner, and Babe Ruth.

1942:  SINGER CLAUDINE LONGET IS BORN.

She's a killer on the ski slopes.   Really.

1943:  ON THE FIRST DAY OF THE BATTLE OF RENNELL ISLAND, THE US CRUISER CHICAGO IS TORPEDOED AND HEAVILY DAMAGED BY JAPANESE BOMBERS.

War is hell.  So is doing comedy.

1944:  ACTRESS KATHARINE ROSS IS BORN.

An early fantasy for yours truly.

1963:  THE FIRST INDUCTEES INTO THE PRO FOOTBALL HALL OF FAME ARE ANNOUNCED.

There were about twenty of them.  I can't be bothered.  Look them up yourself.

1963:  POET ROBERT FROST DIES.

The temperature must have gone over 32 degrees.

1964:  ACTOR ALAN LADD DIES.

Goodbye, Shane.

1967:  THE "ULTIMATE HIGH"  OF THE HIPPIE ERA TAKES PLACE IN SAN FRANCISCO AND FEATURES JANIS JOPLIN, GRATEFUL DEAD, AND ALLEN GINSBERG.

I'll bet.

1977:  ACTOR FREDDIE PRINZE DIES.

Shot himself in the head at a hotel around the corner from my former apartment.  

1980:  ENTERTAINER JIMMY DURANTE DIES.

Good night from Mrs. Calabash.

1996:  PRESIDENT JACQUES CHIRAC ANNOUNCES A DEFINITIVE END TO FRENCH NUCLEAR WEAPONS TESTING.

As if anybody is scared of the French.

2002:  IN HIS STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESS, PRESIDENT GEORGE W. BUSH DESCRIBES "REGIMES THAT SPONSOR TERROR" AS AN AXIS OF EVIL IN WHICH HE INCLUDES IRAQ, IRAN, AND NORTH KOREA.

Face it, gang.  Was he wrong?

2002:  ACTOR HAROLD RUSSELL DIES.

The guy with the hooks in "Best Years of Our Lives."

2007:  RACE HORSE BARBARO DIES.

Allegedly a suicide.

2008:  SINGER MARGARET TRUMAN DIES.

She still couldn't play that damn piano.

2009:  GOVERNOR OF ILLINOIS ROD BLAGOJEVICH IS CONVICTED OF SEVERAL CORRUPTION CHARGES, INCLUDING THE ALLEGED SOLICITATION OF PERSONAL BENEFIT IN EXCHANGE FOR AN APPOINTMENT TO THE US SENATE.

It seems like just yesterday that this was swept under the rug.

2015:  POET ROD MCKUEN DIES.

What rhymes with dead?

2022:  ACTOR HOWARD HESSEMAN DIES.

Dr. Johnny got a fever.

Dinner last night:  Salad.

As The Pope Turns

 

Catching up to some of the junk that got nominated for Oscars led me to "Conclave."  And, frankly, I was a little intrigued.   I mean, a movie about what happens when a Pope dies.   I know there's always a political story about how they elect a new one.

And, for a while, that is exactly what this movie delivers albeit a little soap opera-ish.   And the skids are hit.   Because this is 2025 and all films have to deliver a woke message, "Conclave" does a left turn and takes us down a dark and unwelcome alley.   Frankly, if I were Catholic, I would be offended by the last two reels of the movie.   If this woke business keeps up, all of Hollywood is doomed.

Wake me when the woke is over.

Now I could tell you what turns this movie sour but I would ruin it for the two of you who actually want to see it.  Or maybe I'll be providing a public service.

Whatever.   At the end of the day, "Conclave" isn't worth the time or attention.

LEN'S RATING:  One star.

Dinner last night:  Leftover meat loaf.

Monday Morning Video Laugh - January 27, 2025

 Drive into the skid, please.

Dinner last night:  Meat loaf.

The Sunday Memory Drawer -Drive Time

 

This wasn't actually my dad's car, but close enough in color and vinyl roof.   Trust me, he would not have had a California license plate.   He's probably spinning in his grave because I have one...and dared to move more than ten miles away from Mount Vernon, New York.

Yep, the Buick LeSabre was Dad's vehicle.  And he certainly was a loyal customer to a brand.   When it came to TV sets, he always purchased Zenith. When it came to beer, it was always Schaefer...when you're having more than one (and usually he did).  And, for cars, it was always some sort of Buick in his driveway.

This particular car was the one I remember most because he had it all the way from my grade school years to almost the day he died.  And the history of that car is such that, if you knew it, you knew my father.

The first day it showed up, the thing seemed huge to me.  Parked in front of the garage (which barely fit it), it looked like the Queen Mary docked and awaiting the next voyage to England.  The car's appearance was commanding.  The interior was so big that you could comfortably sit three people in the front seat. I know because, once I was driving it, we shoved a lot of my friends in there like clowns in a Volkswagen.

Dad was proud of this barge.  One of his regular trips was to motor around downtown Mount Vernon.   As he did, he would see his pals hanging out on various street corners.  Dad would honk, stick his arm out the window for a wave, and continue on.   Why he never stopped is beyond me.

Trips to see relatives in Long Island would find us in the car for an hour or two, usually stuck in Sunday traffic on the Long Island Expressway.  We'd take my dog Tuffy along and the LeSabre had a great spacious window ledge in the back for her to stretch out.   Until, of course, we stopped short and the poor dog flew off the ledge and landed on the floor of the back seat.

Those Sunday excursions to Long Island sometimes included my grandmother who needed an airing out.   So, Mom and Dad were in the front.   I was in the back seat with Grandma and Tuffy.   Of course, as soon as we got into the Buick LeSabre for the at-least-an-hour trip home from Deer Park, Long Island, Grandma would take her house keys out.   And clink them in her hands to the point of annoyance.   Of course, being natural enemies, the one who really got pissed was my mother.

"Godamnit, put those keys away!"

Or something like that.   As huge as the car was, the tension filled the vehicle.

When the time was right, I learned to drive on the Buick LeSabre.   My dad would take me on Sundays to Woodlawn Cemetery and that was where I got the feel of steering this tank.

"You can't kill anybody here.   They're already dead."

It took months for me to get the hang of maneuvering this four-wheel yacht.   I always steered wide around corners.   It was like the passenger side of the car was in another zip code.

Unlike some kids, it actually was about four years before I got my driver's license.  I was already in college.  And the timing was perfect.   I remember the first time I asked Dad if I could use the car the following Saturday.   I had a wedding to go to.   In Brooklyn.

"Brooklyn???!!!  We don't go to Brooklyn."

Dad was right.   The Buick LeSabre had been in Westchester, the Bronx, and Long Island.   Never ever Brooklyn.

My father apparently had faith in me because he let me have the car.   I'm sure that he sat home that night anguishing over every second I was gone.   He should have.   As I was steering that thing on the Belt Parkway, I was scared shitless.  I had no idea where the hell I was.   

But, once that threshold had been reached, I became a regular driver of the Buick LeSabre.  My dad worked nights in Stamford, Connecticut, but luckily, he was in a car pool with another guy.   When I became a regular fixture behind the wheel, I got to have the car on both Friday and Saturday nights.

Trust me, the roominess of the front seat was not an advantageous once I got to dating age.   And popped up to the Elmsford Drive-In with someone.   The conversation often had an echo.

During the winter, the car seats in the Buick LeSabre got extra cold.   If you came out of a Yonkers movie theater and it was zero degrees, you could barely let any part of your body touch the upholstery.   Beef could age nicely if you hung it in the back seat.

While I got quite adept at handling this monster, there was one college night where I couldn't accurately measure distance.   I was picking up two ladies on a small and curvy Bronx street for a trip out to a Westbury concert where we would pick up my college roommate at his Newsday internship.   There was another car parked on the curve of this thoroughfare and it was precision to try and get the Buick LeSabre past it without contact.

I didn't succeed.  Metal on metal.  Crunch, scrape, crunch would be seen in the comic strip bubble of my life.   I asked one of my friends to survey my car.

"Good news.   There is no damage that I can see."

Great.

Of course, when we pulled up to Newsday, my college roommate's jaw dropped.

"What the hell happened to your car???"

I made a mental note to come up with some good excuse for my father.   And also to have my friend make an immediate appointment with an optometrist.
But, by this juncture, the Buick LeSabre had already withstood a few nicks and dents with my dad behind the wheel.   He never got any of them fixed.   Until the day he parted with the car, you could see the handlebar indent on the front driver's side where the guy on the bicycle had landed.

Of course, the Buick LeSabre saw less and less action over time.  I moved off on my own and began my own chain of brand loyalty with Toyotas.  And, as Dad got older, he would refuse to drive at night.   Once he got sick and was starting to speed away from this existence, the Buick LeSabre stayed in the same parking space on the Bronx street in front of his apartment.   Once a month, I would come over to start it just so the motor would get some sort of exercise.

It came the day that my father needed the Buick LeSabre to be taken away to Junk Heaven.   He got a couple of his cronies to do the job because, by this time, Dad couldn't venture out-of-doors.   I remember calling him the day the car would be removed.   He picked up the phone and I could tell there were tears rolling down his face.   His chums couldn't get the car started.

"I wish I could help them.   I know that car.  It would start for me."

I know it would have.   If only he could have slid behind the wheel one more time.

Dinner last night:   Chinese chicken salad at Wokcano.

Classic Movie Trailer of the Month - January 2025

 The number one box office hit sixty years ago this month.

Dinner last night:  Leftover lasagna.

When A Camera is a Weapon

 

More photos that were better off being undeveloped. Take, for instance, the one above. Er, the guy in the green gym shorts. What exactly is going on with him at this very moment?

She always gets into his head.

It might be me, but I always love a good nun-on-stilts act.

Yeeeesh! Does Eddie Bauer even carry pants with that length?

Something borrowed, something blue, something stinks, is it you?

Have we told lately that we have a pool? No, really, have we? Because we do. We have a pool. Really. A pool.

Why do I think that Dad doesn't necessarily stop with churros?

Dinner last night:  Meat lasagna.

Len's Recipe of the Month - January 2025

 

After a long culinary hiatus which found me eating mostly prepared meals, I ventured into my Sunday kitchen to try something new.

For some reason, the cooks I follow on-line all includes this month a recipe for something called Swiss Steak.   Hmmm.   Keep in mind that this is an American dish and has nothing to do with Switzerland.  The swissing here is flattening some tougher cuts of beef and tenderizing them to the point that they have little holes in them.

Like Swiss cheese.

Indeed, the easy way to is buying cube steaks at the butcher.   Done and done swissing.

You'll want to get some cube steaks of top or bottom round beef.  For this recipe, get four to six cube steaks.  Salt and pepper them.   Then dredge them with a thin layer of flour.

In a Dutch oven with some EVO, sear the cube steaks about 3 to 4 minutes per side.

Meanwhile, chop up one large carrot, one large onion, and three ribs of celery.  

Remove the steaks and you will notice some brown bits on the bottom of the pan.  Add a little more EVO and cook up the onion, carrot, and celery mixture.  Salt the veggies so they lose some water which you will use to loosen the brown bits.   This should take about 10 to 15 minutes.   Add five cloves of minced garlic.

Now add the following.  

More salt and pepper.

One tablespoon of sugar.

One tablespoon of Worcestershire sauce.

One 28 ounce can of diced tomatoes.

Nestle the steaks back in and put your oven on simmer for two to three hours.  The combination of flavors is exquisite.  Serve over noodles or rice.

And feel free to yodel when you're done.

Dinner last night:  Taylor Ham on English muffin.

This Date in History - January 22

 

Happy birthday to Linda Blair, a real head turner.

565:  EUTYCHIUS IS DEPOSED AS PATRIARCH OF CONSTANTINOPLE BY JOHN SCHOLASTICUS.

Scholasticus for Children.

613:  EIGHT-MONTH-OLD CONSTANTINE IS CROWNED AS CO-EMPEROR BY HIS FATHER HERACLIUS AT CONSTANTINOPLE

Talk about over-achieving at an early age.

1506:  THE FIRST CONTINGENT OF 150 SWISS GUARDS ARRIVES AT THE VATICAN.

Who was watching the place before this?  A bunch of Cub Scouts from Milan?

1552:  EXPLORER SIR WALTER RALEIGH IS BORN.

If only he knew that he would become a cigarette.  With a coupon on the box.

1824:  THE ASHANTIS DEFEAT BRITISH FORCES IN THE GOLD COAST.

Ashantis is really Atlantis if spoken by somebody with a hairlip.

1849:  THE SIEGE OF MULTAN ENDS AFTER NINE MONTHS WHEN THE LAST SIKH DEFENDERS SURRENDER.

I'm sikh of this, too.

1875:  DIRECTOR D.W. GRIFFITH IS BORN.

Birth of a Director.

1877:  ARTHUR TOOTH, AN ANGLICAN CLERGYMAN, IS TAKEN INTO CUSTODY AFTER BEING PROSECUTED FOR USING RITUALISTIC PRACTICES.

And now we are Tooth-less.

1890:  THE UNITED MINE WORKERS OF AMERICA IS FOUNDED IN COLUMBUS, OHIO.

Coal....er, I mean, cool.

1901:  EDWARD VII IS PROCLAIMED KING AFTER THE DEATH OF HIS MOTHER, QUEEN VICTORIA.

It's the next Edward that caused all the fuss.

1909:  ACTRESS ANN SOTHERN IS BORN.

Your Private Secretary!

1917:  PRESIDENT WOODROW WILSON OF THE STILL-NEUTRAL UNITED STATES CALLS FOR "PEACE WITHOUT VICTORY" IN EUROPE.

What a complete wuss.

1927:  TEDDY WAKELAM GIVES THE FIRST LIVE RADIO COMMENTARY OF A FOOTBALL MATCH ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD.

Just in case you thought it was Marv Albert.

1931:  SINGER SAM COOKE IS BORN.

Twistin' the night away.

1934:  ACTOR BILL BIXBY IS BORN.

The guy who lived with My Favorite Martian.

1944:  DURING WORLD WAR II, THE ALLIES COMMENCE OPERATION SHINGLE, AN ASSAULT ON ANZIO, ITALY.

Unrelated fact:  Shingles are caused by the chicken pox virus.

1946:  THE CENTRAL INTELLIGENCE GROUP, A FORERUNNER OF THE CIA, IS CREATED.

Because CIG just doesn't sound the same.

1947:  KTLA, THE FIRST COMMERCIAL TV STATION WEST OF THE MISSISSIPPL, BEGINS OPERATION IN HOLLYWOOD, CALIFORNIA.

Channel 5, for those who are keeping track.

1957:  ISRAEL WITHDRAWS FROM THE SINAI PENINSULA.

And the Sinai Peninsula then smoked a cigarette.

1959:  ACTRESS LINDA BLAIR IS BORN.

If her mom's name was Rosemary, that would be a devil of a coincidence.

1962:  THE ORGANIZATION OF AMERICAN STATES SUSPENDS CUBA'S MEMBERSHIP.

Luckily though, Cuba was allowed to stay in the Archie Fan Club.

1969:  A GUNMAN ATTEMPTS TO ASSASSINATE SOVIET LEADER LEONID BREZHNEV.

Maybe it was Squeaky Fromme-ski.

1970:  THE BOEING 747, THE WORLD'S FIRST JUMBO JET, ENTERS COMMERCIAL SERVICE FOR THE FIRST TIME.  

No upgrades to business class that day.

1973:  PRESIDENT LYNDON B. JOHNSON DIES.

He chose not to live.

1973:  THE SUPREME COURT OF THE US DELIVERS ITS DECISION IN ROE VS. WADE, LEGALIZING ABORTION IN ALL FIFTY STATES.

Should have taken Wade with the points.

1984:  THE APPLE MACINTOSH, THE FIRST CONSUMER COMPUTER WITH A MOUSE, IS INTRODUCED WITH A TV COMMERCIAL DURING SUPER BOWL XVIII.

And so it began.

1994: ACTOR TELLY SAVALAS DIES.

RIP Kojak.

1995:  ROSE KENNEDY DIES.

My goodness, at this point, she was 104.  They could have buried her in a cigar box.

2001:  BASEBALL STAR TOMMIE AGEE DIES.

Drops dead on a NY street.   But he held onto the ball.

2002:  KMART BECOMES THE LARGEST RETAILER IN US HISTORY TO FILE FOR CHAPTER 11 BANKRUPTCY.

And they're still rolling back prices.

2004:  DANCER ANN MILLER DIES.

From On the Town to Under It.

2005:  SECRETARY ROSE MARY WOODS DIES.

The joke is______________________________ finally.

2008:  ACTOR HEATH LEDGER DIES.

One way to win an Oscar.

2010:  ACTRESS JEAN SIMMONS DIES.

I'm Mrs. Spartacus.

2012:  COACH JOE PATERNO DIES.

A great way to duck a subpoena.

2021:  BASEBALL STAR HANK AARON DIES.

It's amazing what you can do without steroids.

Dinner last night:  Salad.

And Your Point Is?

 

Just to show you that yesterday was a normal occurrence every four years, here is a drawing of Martin Van Buren being inaugurated to be US President.  This is an event that happens by Constitutional law every January 20. (Or January 21 if the 20th is on a Sunday.)   Nothing new here and yesterday was just the norm.  And quoting one more time my dad, the thing about a crooked politician is that there's always another one right after that is even more crooked.

These days, your vote for President is either loved or hated and both are at their very worst degrees.  Friendships are formed and sometimes ended depending upon who you vote for.  Yesterday was no different.  Trump is loved.  Trump is hated. And, often, your Facebook status as somebody's friend can be at issue as a result.

Now I'm one who doesn't revolve my life around the White House. But I have friends who do.   And those who hate Trump are trying to figure out how to get around what is for them a horrific week.  And I am absolutely flummoxed by some of the things they are posting on social media.   So here's how some people I know are going to "celebrate" this week.

Wear black all week.

Fly the American flag upside down.

Stay off all social media.

Turn off all news shows.

Stay in bed.

Seriously.

Every day and in every way, the reactions of some allegedly rational people stun me.   Do people think this makes that much of a difference?

Again, I think of my dad.  And what he might have said when he heard that outgoing President Biden pardoned all his family in the last 15 minutes of his Presidency.

"If they're innocent, why are they being pardoned?'

And, from Heaven, I hear a mike drop.

Dinner last night:  Leftover Swiss steak.

Monday Morning Video Laugh - January 20, 2025

 On his last day in office, shall we bid a fond farewell to...

Dinner last night:  Swiss Steak.

The Sunday Memory Drawer - Afterschool Snacking

 

These days, all kids have to do is walk ten feet from their remote learning classroom to the fridge.  But, back in the real days... 

After a grueling day of arithmetic, there was nothing more exciting and inviting than getting that wonderful afterschool snack. And, I'm not talking about the dried fruit chips or the healthy apple that soccer moms today insist on. Nope, I'm talking about the out-and-out gross "mega calories from fat" treat that you could only pull off the racks from your favorite mom-and-pop grocery store. Screw the healthy stuff. Bring me the sugar-laden pastries. Besides, my mom was at work and miles away from our bowl of fruit.

Every afternoon, my neighborhood chum Leo and I would take whatever change we had in our pockets and head "around the corner." Now, we had two grocery stores at our convenience. Some butcher named Gene ran one and that was more of a place your mom would shop for dinner. Fresh meats and lots of canned vegetables. Not Del Monte or Libby's. Gene offered up the bargain basement variety of canned peas. By some company called Krasdale. If you were lucky, the creamed corn might have actually been vacuum packed within the past five years.

Since Gene's grocery was light on the heavy snacks, we always ventured a few storefronts down First Street to Charlie's Delicatessen. He had racks upon racks of baked goods, chips, and anything that was unreasonably bad for you. Besides, Charlie was a German guy and my family always preferred for me to patronize the "Dutchman." If there had been an Italian-run grocery store in our area, I'm sure Leo's parents would preferred he go there instead. But, I digress...

Charlie's snack racks definitely had to be on my dentist's hit list. There was nothing good there. At the same time, it was all good. Yummy, filling, and the type of food that just manufactured fat cells in your body. I had a few favorites.

Any bag of Tom's Chips was not one of them. In those days, you judged the merits of a grocery store by the brand of potato chips they offered. And you didn't mix brands. If you sold Tom's Chips, the store was low class. Probably in a crappy neighborhood. If you sold Wise Potato Chips, you were the equivalent of Nordstrom's in my eyes. Charlie had Wise. Done deal.

Actually, if I was in the mood for a non-sweet treat, I loved Cheez Waffles. Little salty waffle-like cracker sandwiches with "cheese" in the middle. I rationalized that this was all healthy, so it was okay to wolf down a whole bag. How many daily food requirements would I be meeting? Dairy, grain, starch. Cheez Waffles had it all. A complete meal all in itself. Except that probably wasn't real cheese. Or even Cheez Whiz. I didn't care. I chomped down on them nonetheless.

For the everyday sweet tooth and the future day cavity, there were Yodels. By the wonderful Drake's Cake company, which hopefully has a franchise in the afterlife. Admittedly, I probably haven't had a Drake's product since I was 10. No worries, before I hit that age, I consumed a lifetime supply. Yodels were these little chocolate and cream roll-ups. Dipped in even more chocolate. And you had to lick the wrapper because usually the chocolate had melted to that as well. You needed a bath after eating a package. The smarter kids in my neighborhood knew one thing. You didn't dare buy Yodels during the summer.

These chocolate hockey pucks went by different names. Sometimes, they were Ring Dings. Other times, they were Ding Dongs. The brand name was a variety of iterations on the bell concept. I didn't care. They always hit the spot. Now, Drake's did offer one twist on the Ring Ding/Ding Dong and that was a winner. Instead of the devil's food cake inside, there were a version with yellow cake and it was delicious. Always preferred, but rare to find. I apparently lived in a devil's food neighborhood.

To wash it all down, there was Yoo Hoo. The drink of champions. It was good enough for Yogi Berra. It was damn good enough for us. And there was even more rationalization at play here. After all, this was a milk product, right? And kids are supposed to drink more milk, right? Isn't that what President Kennedy just told us? This is probably why my dentist voted for Richard Nixon.

For some mystical reason, my Saturday afternoon purchase was always reserved for one very special snack.

A Slim Jim. Actually, two. Back then, they weren't that long. Probably six inches in length. I figured this was my protein requirement for the week. Because it was meat, right? Right????

I savored my two Slim Jims so much that I would eat them slowly. Craving every nitrate, morsel by morsel, as it slid down to whatever part of my stomach would try to process it. Every week, I'd run to Charlie's, get my Slim Jims, and then plop down in front of Grandma's TV to watch Charlie Chan Mystery Theater on Channel 5, Metromedia in New York. And I would slowly ease the "meat" out of the Slim Jims. I could make the two of them last for the entire show.

Truth be told, I still, from rare time to rare time, buy a Slim Jim. One day, I took it home and popped a Charlie Chan movie on the DVD.

It wasn't the same.

I went into the kitchen and got myself a fresh Bartlett pear.

Dinner last night: Orange chicken.

Classic TV Theme Song of the Month - January 2025

 Sixty years ago, this was on primetime NBC.  My name...Jose Jimenez.

Dinner last night:  Sandwich.

Attention: Walmart Shoppers

 

The sad thing is that he probably knew the pants were ripped when he put them on.

You can't spell "thong" without the letters t-o-n.

Usually, the road kill is underneath your car.

A homage to that old Dan Aykroyd SNL sketch about the appliance repairman.

Perhaps that text message is saying "YOU WENT OUT LIKE THAT??"

This is what they call a "ghetto fix."

Now that's what I call bloomers.

Tu tu pathetic.

A little less attitude and a lot less potato chips.

This hair do really sucks.

Dinner last night:  Salisbury steak.

The Best Film of 2025

 

Should I make such a bold statement when we are only 2 weeks into the year? Well, given Hollywood's current track record for turning out junk, it will be interesting to revisit this blog review at the end of the year.

"September 5" is that good. Indeed, I went to see it last weekend as a means to ditch all the depressing news about the Los Angeles wild fires.   Think about that. I needed a movie about the 1972 Munich Olympics massacre to be a diversion.

This film is a totally fascinating look at the ABC Sports control room on that fateful 1972 day when they had to report on the terrorist act that took over those Olympics.  As a matter of fact, I would say 90 percent of the movie takes place in that control room, which is being run by a young producer named Geoff Mason.  He has to navigate through philosophical arguments on what to show and not show.  Several real-life folks are depicted, such as Roone Arledge and Peter Jennings.   Most of the people there that day have passed on.  But Mason is still around and this amps up the authenticity of the film.

The ABC anchor that day, Jim McKay, is shown so frequently and serves as a vital character.  He is not depicted by an actor, but his presence makes us feel that he is still alive and with us...a remarkable feat by director and co-writer Tim Fehlbaum.  And this movie, at a tight 90 minute running length, is as efficient as a story can be.  There is not a wasted word or frame.

I see that "September 5" was originally released in December, which means it might be eligible for Oscar consideration.   We should be so lucky.  Still, it probably will be my Best Picture pick for this year or next.

LEN'S RATING:  Four stars.

Dinner last night:  Hot dogs.

This Date in History - January 15

 

Happy birthday to Margaret O'Brien.  Whatever Judy tells you, don't take the green pills in her hand.

69:  OTHO SEIZES POWER IN ROME, PROCLAIMING HIMSELF EMPEROR OF ROME, BUT RULES FOR ONLY THREE MONTHS BEFORE COMMITTING SUICIDE.

So, Otho, it wasn't what you thought, heh?

1493:  CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS SETS SAIL FOR SPAIN, ENDING HIS TRIP TO THE NEW WORLD.

That must have racked up some hotel bill.

1559:  ELIZABETH I IS CROWNED QUEEN OF ENGLAND IN WESTMINSTER ABBEY OF LONDON.

Elizabeth the Originator.

1759:  THE BRITISH MUSEUM OPENS.

Finally giving British school children some place to go on a field trip.

1777:  DURING THE AMERICAN REVOLUTION, NEW CONNECTICUT DECLARES ITS INDEPENDENCE.   IT LATER BECOMES VERMONT.

And Old Connecticut can now just be regular Connecticut.

1782:  SUPERINTENDENT OF FINANCE ROBERT MORRIS GOES BEFORE THE US CONGRESS TO RECOMMEND ESTABLISHMENT OF A NATIONAL MINT AND COINAGE.

So this is the idiot who invented the penny???

1822:  DURING THE GREEK WAR OF INDEPENDENCE, DEMETRIOS YPSILANTIS IS ELECTED PRESIDENT.

And later opens up a diner on Northern Boulevard in Queens.

1844:  THE UNIVERSITY OF NOTRE DAME RECEIVES ITS CHARTER FROM THE STATE OF INDIANA.

Regis Philbin was there for the signing.

1870:  A POLITICAL CARTOON FOR THE FIRST TIME SYMBOLIZES THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY WITH A DONKEY.

And they remain jackasses to this day.

1889:  THE COCA COLA COMPANY IS INCORPORATED IN ATLANTA, GEORGIA.

The incorporation that refreshes.

1892:  JAMES NAISMITH PUBLISHES THE RULES OF BASKETBALL.

There are rules??

1908:  THE ALPHA KAPPA ALPHA SORORITY BECOMES THE FIRST GREEK LETTER ORGANIZATION FOUNDED BY AFRICAN AMERICAN COLLEGE WOMEN.

I have five different jokes.   Please e-mail me privately for specifics.

1909:  DRUMMER GENE KRUPA IS BORN.

Hey, knock off that racket!!

1913:  ACTOR LLOYD BRIDGES IS BORN.

I guess I picked the wrong day to come down a birth canal.

1919:  A LARGE MOLASSES TANK IN BOSTON EXPLODES AND A WAVE OF MOLASSES RUSHES THROUGH THE STREET, KILLING 21 PEOPLE.

Who apparently were slower than to get out of the way.

1927:  ACTRESS PHYLLIS COATES IS BORN.

The other Lois Lane.

1929:  ACTIVIST MARTIN LUTHER KING JR. IS BORN.

And now everybody has a Monday off in January.

1937:  ACTRESS MARGARET O'BRIEN IS BORN.

Meet us at the fair.

1943:  THE PENTAGON IS DEDICATED IN ARLINGTON, VIRGINIA.

It was the world's largest office building.  Amazing for a place that is not a skycraper.

1947:  THE BRUTALIZED CORPSE OF ELIZABETH SHORT (THE BLACK DAHLIA) IS FOUND IN LOS ANGELES.

Paging Lt. Columbo....

1962:  THE DERVENI PAPYRUS, EUROPE'S OLDEST SURVIVING MANUSCRIPT, IS FOUND IN NORTHERN GREECE.

Now that's something to sell on E-bay.

1967:  THE FIRST SUPER BOWL IS PLAYED IN LOS ANGELES.  THE GREEN BAY PACKERS DEFEAT THE KANSAS CITY CHIEFS, 35-10.

Back then, there was absolutely no pre-game hype.

1970:  MOAMMAR GADHAFI IS PROCLAIMED PREMIER OF LIBYA.

If they insist...

1973:  CITING PROGRESS IN PEACE NEGOTIATIONS, PRESIDENT RICHARD NIXON ANNOUNCES THE SUSPENSION OF OFFENSIVE ACTION IN NORTH VIETNAM.

As if the offense was doing any good.

1976:  GERALD FORD'S WOULD-BE ASSASSIN, SARA JANE MOORE, IS SENTENCED TO LIFE IN PRISON.

That's one off the streets.

1987: ACTOR RAY BOLGER DIES.

The last straw.

2001:  WIKIPEDIA GOES ONLINE FOR THE FIRST TIME.

Thank God.  Otherwise, I wouldn't be able to do these Wednesday historical pieces.

2005:  ACTRESS RUTH WARRICK DIES.

All My Corpses.

2009:  US AIRWAYS FLIGHT 1549 MAKES AN EMERGENCY LANDING IN THE HUDSON RIVER.   EVERYBODY SURVIVES.

To this day, Sully is still the ultimate hero.

2019:  ACTRESS CAROL CHANNING DIES.

Goodbye, Dolly.

Dinner last night:   Leftover SPO.

The Small Silver Lining in the Smoky LA Sky

 

Unless you were on Mars...or visiting Ghana...you couldn't ignore the perilous week that Los Angeles had.   And is still having.   

The entire Palisades Village is gone, except for allegedly my dentist's office.  Malibu is partially destroyed.  So are other areas throughout Los Angeles.  And it's one or two degrees of separation for you to know somebody who lost their home.   I know three such people.

Why?

Well, this is all the end result of environmentalists getting their hands on government policies so they could save the planet.   We'll save the planet while killing everything else.   No more controlled burns of brush.  Reduced water pressure with low-flow toilets and showers.  Sure, let's fix a lot of inconsequential stuff while everything burns around us.

There's lot of blame to go around.  But, at the end of the fiery day, let's look at the two idiots pictured above.  Two incompetents that got elected because A/One is Black and B/They both have Ds that follow their names.  Neither one should be working at what they are doing, but A Lister Hollywood helped get them both elected.   By the way, that's the same A Listers who lost homes in the Pacific Palisades.

I've know Mayor Karen Bass was a fraud long before she became Mayor.  You see, for several years, she was my Congressional rep.  On three different occasions, I contacted her office with questions on health care.  No one, even an intern, bothered to contact me.   The unspoken legend is that they ignore citizens if their last name looks "too white."   

Well, despite the fact Bass was told there might be a catastrophic fire event in the coming days, she still got on a plane and flew to Ghana to represent the US as a Presidential inauguration.   

As for the other shithead above, Governor Gavin Newsom and his latent stupidity might finally have sunk him here.   The guy who just loves being glib for the camera can't explain why fire fighters couldn't get water pressure to fight a fire.  But most people, except for the Hollywood A-Listers, tried to get rid of him in a recall two years ago.   If that vote was held today, the outcome might be different.

So, that, my friends, is the small silver lining amid all the smoky ash.  Right now is not a good time to be a Democrat in California.

Dinner last night:  Taylor Ham on English muffin.