I have no clue how any of this slipped by me. Apparently, there was this LA-based sports agent named J.B. Bernstein who, as his own agency is failing, hits on a scheme to get back into the public eye. He's going to stage a reality TV show competition to find the best cricket players who will ultimately translate into Major League Baseball pitchers. He does so by heading off to Mumbai for a couple of months because, apparently, that's where all the good cricket players are. And I thought that was the mecca for Dell customer support. Perhaps that was my dis-connect for knowing nothing about this true tale. I do systematically tune out anything remotely related to India, a country where the flies are bigger than your head.
So, Bernstein heads off to Monsoonville and comes back with two youngsters who can throw a baseball at a speed of 83 mph. Um, that's not exactly going to get you on a major league pitching staff, although one would argue they would provide an upgrade to the current New York Met bullpen. But I digress...
Bernstein corrals Rinku and Dinesh to come back to America with him and start their baseball tutelage under USC baseball coach Tom House. Okay, that name I recognize. He was in the Atlanta Brave bullpen and caught Henry Aaron's 715th home run on the fly in 1974. So, at least, I know he's part of this true story that has still completely eluded me.
Meanwhile, Rinku and Dinesh don't speak much English and are fascinated by America. A closing hotel elevator hotel keeps them engaged for hours. But, the ability to throw a baseball for strikes is why they're here and they suddenly forget how to do that. It's up to Bernstein, House, and a cast of thousands to get the boys ready for their tryout in front of 30 Major League Baseball team scouts.
Yeah, it all happened around 2007 and 2008. Where the heck was I?
Since this is a Disney movie, you just know that courage will be shown and hard work will be rewarded. Plus there is an emerging romance between Bernstein and a student nurse who lives in his guest house. The Indian boys watch this unfold as well and this replaces hotel elevator doors as their main focus.
If it sounds kind of boring and trite, trust me. It's not. Indeed, "Million Dollar Arm" just might be the best baseball movie I've seen in the past five years. I was captivated by the yarn unraveling in front of me and totally mesmerized by the fact that a baseball "true story" was new to me.
The acting is spot on, which is an accomplishment since Jon Hamm stars as Bernstein and I have never liked him previously. Lake Bell, so damn good in a gem called "In A World," is such a believable romantic interest that I actually want to find out what hospital she works at. Bill Paxton as Tom House and Alan Arkin as the quintessential cranky "old school" baseball scout round out a top notch cast. I have no idea who played Rinku and Dinesh because all Indian names look alike to me and I was too busy reading the closing credits to see which real baseball people had cameos.
The whole damn movie works and I was propelled afterwards to do a Google search to find out what really happened to the two young pitchers who are signed (spoiler alert) by a major league team at the end. It turns out that neither of them got past Class A, but that's not the point. This is Disney and we have admire their grit and pluck. Still, I'm thinking they could still be an upgrade for the Met bullpen.
The best thing about "Million Dollar Arm" is that you don't have to be a baseball fan to enjoy it. And, even if you are one like me, chances are you have no clue that this story ever happened in the first place. But, it did.
LEN'S RATING: Three-and-a-half stars.
Dinner last night: Sandwich and fruit.
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