Happy birthday, Godfather.
404 BC: DURING THE PELOPONNESIAN WAR, LYSANDER'S SPARTAN ARMIES DEFEATED THE ATHENIANS AND THE WAR ENDS.
Peloponnesian? Hmm. Reminds me of that Honeymooners episodes where Ralph talks about a bunch of poloponies.
1134: THE NAME ZAGREB WAS MENTIONED FOR THE FIRST TIME IN THE FELICIAN CHARTER RELATING TO THE ESTABLISHMENT OF THE ZAGREB BISHOPRIC AROUND 1094.
It's crap like that that explains why I never paid any attention in World History class.
1607: DURING THE EIGHTY YEARS' WAR, THE DUTCH FLEET DESTROYS THE ANCHORED SPANISH FLEET AT GIBRALTAR.
Eighty years? That's a lot of bullets.
1644: THE CHONGZHEN EMPEROR, THE LAST EMPEROR OF MING DYNASTY CHINA, COMMITS SUICIDE DURING A PEASANT REBELLION LED BY LI ZICHENG.
Peasant rebellion? Gee, Barry Sanders is old.
1792: HIGHWAYMAN NICOLAS J. PELLETIER BECOMES THE FIRST PERSON EXECUTED BY GUILLOTINE.
Way a head of his time.
1792: LA MARSEILLAISE (THE FRENCH NATIONAL ANTHEM) IS COMPOSED BY CLAUDE JOSEPH ROUGET DE LISLE.
I wonder if highwayman Pelletier ever got to hear it.
1829: CHARLES FREMANTLE ARRIVES IN HMS CHALLENGER OFF THE COAST OF MODERN-DAY WESTERN AUSTRALIA PRIOR TO DECLARING THE SWAN RIVER COLONY FOR THE UNITED KINGDOM.
This is the Challenger ship that didn't blow up in space.
1846: OPEN CONFLICT BEGINS OVER THE DISPUTED BORDER OF TEXAS, TRIGGERING THE MEXICAN-AMERICAN WAR.
And as if it was ripped from today's headlines.
1847: THE LAST SURVIVORS OF THE DONNER PARTY ARE OUT OF THE WILDERNESS.
Frankly, in today's terms, you're never completely out of the woods.
1859: BRITISH AND FRENCH ENGINEERS BREAK GROUND FOR THE SUEZ CANAL.
England and France working together? Somebody calls Ripley's.
1861: DURING THE CIVIL WAR, THE UNION ARMY ARRIVES IN WASHINGTON DC.
There goes any vacancies at the Holiday Inn.
1898: THE UNITED STATES DECLARES WAR ON SPAIN.
I do it with Mexico every single time I go to my local car wash.
1901: NEW YORK BECOMES THE FIRST US STATE TO REQUIRE AUTOMOBILE LICENSE PLATES.
So prisoners at Sing Sing finally have something to do during the day.
1916: THE UNITED KINGDOM DECLARES MARTIAL LAW IN IRELAND.
Can you really blame them?
1917: SINGER ELLA FITZGERALD IS BORN.
And one of her legs lived longer than the other.
1932: BASKETBALL PLAYER MEADOWLARK LEMON IS BORN.
Jack's brother.
1939: DC COMICS GIVES BIRTH TO BATMAN.
How did they ever get the Batmobile down that birth canal?
1940: ACTOR AL PACINO IS BORN.
Just you think you're in the womb, they pull you right out.
1944: THE UNITED NEGRO COLLEGE FUND IS INCORPORATED.
And it still exists. Even with that now verboten word.
1945: THE NAZI OCCUPATION ARMY SURRENDERS AND LEAVES NORTHERN ITALY. BENITO MUSSOLINI'S PUPPET FASCIST REGIME DISSOLVES.
Bye, bye, Adolf. Arrivederci, Benny.
1953: FRANCIS CRICK AND JAMES D. WATSON PUBLISH "MOLECULAR STRUCTURE OF NUCLEIC ACIDS" DESCRIBING THE DOUBLE HELIX STRUCTURE OF DNA.
It's crap like this that explains why I never paid attention in Biology either.
1960: THE US NAVY SUBMARINE USS TRITON COPLETES THE FIRST SUBMERGED CIRCUMNAVIGATION OF THE GLOBE.
Even Michael Phelps came up for air once in a while.
1972: ACTOR GEORGE SANDERS DIES.
He killed himself. All About Suicide.
1982: ISRAEL COMPLETES ITS WITHDRAWAL FROM THE SINAI PENINSULA PER THE CAMP DAVID ACCORDS.
It wasn't worth the papyrus it was written on.
1983: PIONEER 10 TRAVELS BEYOND PLUTO'S ORBIT.
Does Mickey and Goofy know about this?
1995: GAME SHOW HOST ART FLEMING DIES.
Undertakers for $50.
1995: ACTRESS GINGER ROGERS DIES.
Swing Time is up.
2007: BORIS YELTSIN IS BURIED.
Hopefully it was after he died.
2009: ACTRESS BEATRICE ARTHUR DIES.
God finally got you for that, Maude.
2010: ACTRESS DOROTHY PROVINE DIES.
It's now a dead, dead, dead, dead world.
2015: RIOTS BREAK OUT IN BALTIMORE FOLLOWING THE DEATH OF FREDDIE GRAY IN POLICE CUSTODY.
Just in case you thought it was because the Orioles won.
Dinner last night: Had a big lunch so just a salad.
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