Paging Regis Philbin

Desperate for any kind of original TV programming during this earth-shattering pandemic, ABC has decided to bring back yet another game show.  Already having dumped on our door step retro reboots of "The Match Game," "Celebrity Family Feud," and "To Tell the Truth," we are now treated to a celebrity-laden new edition of "WWTBAM."   If you thought I was going to type out the whole title, you're nuts.

Now, truth be told, I loved the original incarnation of this show when it was done with regular people (well, trivia geeks) and it was hosted by Regis Philbin who knew how to walk the fine line of entertainment and game show tone.  Of course, ABC doesn't do anything in 2020 without including their marquee attraction Jimmy Kimmel.   His inclusion alone was the equivalent of sticking my finger down my throat.   I find the guy smarmy and grossly unfunny.

Okay, a little back story.   I am biased against Kimmel.   I know people who used to work for his show.   He is an out-and-out phony and scumbag.   How the #MeToo movement has overlooked him is mind-blowing.   Plus he really is not amusing and clearly needs writers.   Oh, by the way, he romanced a writer's assistant, married her, and then installed her as head writer.   She, in turn, fired some of the staff.   

Charming.  I told you I knew stuff.

But, here we go again.  Jimmy Kimmel is shoved down our gizzards like a dose of castor oil.   And, true to form and just like what the sleazy Alec Baldwin did with the "Match Game" reboot, Kimmel hosts this game show as if the program is all about him.     Forget the suspense around the next question or the money level.  Jimmy is just concerned about the next unfunny thing he can spew out.

The first celebrity up to bat in this eight week series was Eric Stonestreet as the entire night on ABC was a tribute to the departing "Modern Family." (FYI, that show ran five seasons too long).   Stonestreet didn't have a chance as Kimmel barely shut up.   I realize that Regis is probably 120 at this juncture, but his inclusion would have been so welcome.

One of the more bizarre moments in the first episode was Stonestreet grappling with a high money level question.   He deliberates for a few moments and then croaks out his guess.   Inexplicably, Kimmel announces that we will be back after this message and Stonestreet has to stew for another two minutes. Horrible television.   I am sure you can't blame Kimmel for that.  But, I will...

Another reboot development in this audience-less COVID-19 world was with the lifelines.   Of course, you can still do lifelines and 50/50s, but asking the audience is not an option.   Here, it is replaced with...Ask Jimmy!  Are you kidding me?   Doesn't the host have the answers in front of him on that console (FYI, positioned a convenient six feet away from the contestant)?  Kimmel claims they are not, but do you really believe that the producers and Kimmel would allow his utter stupidity to be on display here?   Of course, Jimmy will be right.   All the freakin' time.

I saw the preview of upcoming celebrity participants.   Anthony Anderson...another person bypassing the #MeToo frenzy.   And Anderson Cooper who is as dumb as a door knob.  There was nobody listed that would prompt my future viewing.

But, indeed, the biggest deterrent from my down-the-road viewing is the host himself.   I can't wait for ABC's next use of Kimmel.   Maybe as host for Midnight Christmas Eve mass from the Vatican.

Dinner last night:  Leftover lasagna from the freezer.