Color Me Wednesday

What was that Procol Harum song? A whiter shade of pale?

---So, from this series of Sammy Sosa photos, we can see one more side effect of steroid use.

---Your muscles bulge, but you also wind up looking like Duke Ellington.

---So does this now work in reverse? When does Mark McGwire start looking like Idi Amin?

---Just for the record: I consider myself white enough.

---Speaking of baseball, I watch a little bit of the Yankee celebration at New York's City Hall. Where the World Series trophy was dedicated to the absent and ailing George Steinbrenner to great cheers from the crowd.

---I have a question. Since when did that fat bastard become such a beloved character? You'd think he was Burl Ives singing "Frosty the Snowman."

---From the Very Short Memory Department: It wasn't that long ago when Boss George was feared by all his employees, who were regularly fired, re-hired, and then fired again.

---As far as I'm concerned, that dirtbag deserves every bit of oatmeal drooling from his mouth onto his shirt.

---Rapper Jay Z apparently became the good luck charm of the Yankees during the postseason. Which I'm sure further confused the mind-scrambled George.

---"Who's that? Horace Clarke?"

---I watched Game 6 of the World Series from a Dallas, Texas sports bar. Where you can still smoke.

---Cough, cough, cough.

---Maybe it was the second hand smoke that prompted all the shooting at Fort Hood.

---Of course, it had to be something crazy to make that well meaning guy snap like that.

---How about he's a freakin' terrorist????

---I am laughing that some news reports are still calling him the "alleged" shooter.

---And OJ Simpson is still the "suspected" killer of Nicole and Ron.

---I am waiting to hear that this idiot "accidentally" shot 13 people.

---Jeez, this country really is like the Roman Empire in its waning days.

---Oddly enough, I got out of Texas alive last Thursday. A few others didn't.

---The only time I ever see any of those dreary morning news shows is when I'm in a hotel room.

---Watching the awful "Today Show," I laughed out loud at Matt Lauer's "Holocaust-like" haircut. I love these idiots who embrace the skin tight hair dos. Trying to be hip. Trying to be trendy.

---And also trying to cover up the fact that they've lost their hair.

---Lauer is still as dumb as a post. And the last time he delivered any hard news, he was riding a bicycle.

---You can't watch these shows without the never ending news crawl at the bottom of the screen.

---This was "breaking news" last Thursday: "Tonight on Jay Leno---Wanda Sykes and Rachael Ray."

---Good to know. Now I know how to steel myself for the day.

---And what the fuck happened to Al Roker? This asshole looks anoxeric. Like one of those shrunken skulls you see on the tram tour of Universal Studios.

---Al looked like a chocolate bunny three weeks after Easter.

---I flipped over to "Good Morning America" for a few moments. Then, I realized that the objective of my morning was to wake up, not go back to sleep.

---Yesterday marked the 40th anniversary of "Sesame Street." And times have changed.

---Dieticians have gotten involved to curtail just how many cookies the Cookie Monster eats.

---Meanwhile, Mom and Dad are still trucking the youngins over to McDonald's for dinner.

---Does Tickle Me Elmo have a case for physical abuse?

---Michelle Obama was on the Sesame Street broadcast and Big Bird was delighted.

---There was finally somebody else on the set with more junk in the trunk.

More importantly, today is Veteran's Day. Remember somebody.

Dinner last night: Grilled steak salad.