Friday, May 24, 2019

Dead In Front of A Studio Audience

Boy, oh, boy, where do I start?

Unless you were on the planet Jupiter on Wednesday, you probably know that ABC ran a stunt special where they brought in new casts to enact special episodes of the vintage "All in the Family" and "The Jeffersons."  This was the brain (dead) child of original creator Norman Lear and his resident sycophant Jimmy Kimmel.   The goal was to show younger audiences about some of the history of great television.  And, oh, yeah.  To remind them that racism is still rampant in this country.

Trust me.  In the May sweeps month, they would have been much better off rebooting the old "Battle of the Network Stars."  Hmm, let's see if Willie Aames can still beat Scott Baio in a swimming relay.   

To say that the Kimmel/Lear production was a travesty is being kind.   This was a complete car wreck from initial impact.   After five minutes, I was surprised that air bags didn't pop out of my TV screen.

It all started with Norman and Jimmy seated in some movable box like they were the two old theater guys on the Muppets.   
They told us that what we would be seeing is epic.   Nothing like oversell.  But they then schooled us on the subject matter and that so many things first discussed in these shows nearly fifty years ago are still plaguing America today.  Frankly, the only thing plaguing America today are dumbbells like these two reminding us that we are being plagued in America today.

Don't get me wrong.   Norman Lear was a genius.  The operative word there is "was."  He's 97 years old today and should be content to enjoying his daily #17 sandwich at Langer's Deli.  Instead, he is picking off whatever meat is left on his own carcass.  As for Kimmel who apparently spearheaded the efforts to bring these classics to a new audience, he remains steadfastly his greatest fan.  I know people who have worked for him.   The only thing Jimmy Kimmel focuses on is Jimmy Kimmel.

So, they began with a 1973 episode of "AITF" and they picked an episode that showed off Archie Bunker's racism and bigotry to a T.   Whether you agreed with Archie or not, he was a character you grew to love.   But not the Archie in the episode they redid.   He came off as an out-and-out villain and true fans of the original version could see those shadings as provided by Carroll O'Connor.  When you are doing this with an agenda, Archie didn't have a chance despite the noble efforts of Woody Harrelson.

As for the rest of the cast, the acting was by and large atrocious.   Marisa Tomei gave Edith qualities that made it seem like she was mentally challenged.   I have no clue who the idiots were playing Mike and Gloria and I likely won't be seeing them again.  Sean Hayes pranced in as neighbor Frank Lorenzo and it's clear to me that Hayes can no longer essay a character outside of the persona he plays on "Will and Grace."  The only passable performer was Wanda Sykes who added a nice touch or two to her portrayal of Louise Jefferson.

And then there was Jamie Foxx as George Jefferson.   The moment he sashayed through the front door, I could see he was not acting.  He was simply channeling every tic and mannerism of the original George, Sherman Hemsley.  Apparently, Rich Little was not available. Foxx was so occupied with this that he forgot his lines, broke character, and exclaimed "hey, we're live."   Idiot.  Well, at least, none of these jokers were reading cue cards like the dopes on SNL.  But, still.

We moved onto the second episode and the script was the very first episode of "The Jeffersons" where Louise and George battle over hiring a maid.  Now we were joined by Will Ferrell and Kerry Washington as Tom and Helen Willis, along with the almost unrecognizable Jackee as their maid.  Again, Foxx' preening as George distracted the viewer from even remotely enjoying or tolerating the proceedings.  

As luck would have it, this episode did offer the first glimpse of Florence the Jeffersons' maid and we were lucky to have the original, Marla Gibbs, actually appear in the role.   I will give you one guess which actor did the best job of showing any semblance of wise acting choices.  Yep, the 88-year-old Marla.
Now I remember that the original episode has a wonderful closing line by Florence that brought down the house in 1975.  It was all about "overcoming."  It didn't get the same reaction in 2019, largely because a lot of the audience didn't have a clue that this was a reference to the 1960's slogan "We Shall Overcome."

And that was another problem with this entire affair.   The studio audience.  They screamed and clapped and cheered way too much.   Every character's entrance and exit was greeted with wild histrionics.   Come on, folks.  You want to do that kind of whooping and hollering?   Go get tickets for Ellen or those clowns with "The View."   Another major distraction amongst many others.

And here's where we talk about some additional blood on ABC's hands.  In both episodes, the ubiquitous "N Word" was used in the context of the script.  Every time it was used, the network bleeped it.

Shameful.   Especially since the original episodes air on cable networks and streaming services with every word intact.   I know this for a fact.  I have seen it.   It was one more grievance on my list, but, at this point, I was running out of ink.

This all had the smell of community theater where your local grocer gets the lead.   The set direction was dead on and perfect, but nobody listens to the decor.   The over emoting from all the actors can be placed at the doorstep of James Burrows, the overrated Hollywood go-to sitcom director.  Burrows is quietly well known for being lazy and letting actors run amok.   That's exactly what they did here.   I mean, when the highlight is Jennifer Hudson singing "Movin' On Up" as she walks through the Jefferson apartment, you know the bottom of the barrel is approaching.

All in all, this entire evening was better off being unseen.   But what the heck do I know?   The Nielsen numbers soared off the chart.  So expect the wise and all knowing Lear and Kimmel to do this during every sweeps month.   Expect to see reincarnations of "Good Times," "Maude," and maybe even "Diff'rent Strokes."   The studio audience will scream in delight.   Norman and Jimmy will educate us on how important this all is.   

And I will be watching the originals on another channel.

Dinner last night:  Beef sausage and onions.

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