Way Out Wednesday

Let me light your way.

---I think Obama has a movie coming out this Friday. Why else would he be appearing this week on every show on television?

---All the Sunday news shows. Then yakking with Letterman.

---When do we get to see him and Michelle modeling Snuggies on late night TV?

---Oooh, I got lots of other ideas for them.

---"The Real Housewives of The South Side of Chicago."

---"High Stakes Poker." Obama playing Rahm Emanuel in a game of Texas Hold'em.

---"The Amazing Race." And no, I don't mean that as a racist shot. We can have POTUS and FLOTUS running around all these foreign lands.

---No, wait, they already did that.

---By the way, now that the race issue is Topic A on Letterman's comedy show, it is safe to say that this debate is now officially over.

---There is apparently no age limit on incompetence. Exhibit A: Jimmy Carter.

---In our world of revisionist history, he's looked on as this genius of diplomacy.

---In my world of history, the guy is a babbling fool. And the worst President of the 20th Century.

---Not so fast, you naysayers who want to remind me about George W. Bush. He was President during the 21st Century. Got ya!

---When Carter goes off on one of his international peacemaking jaunts, can we simply revoke his passport while he's gone?

---Surprise, Jimmy. You can't come back in. We'll back up your stuff and mail it to you.

---For somebody who wants to keep his daughters' lives private, Obama sure does talk about them a lot.

---Except, on some show, he mispronounced one of their names.

---Teleprompter glitch, I suppose. We really can't expect him to know his kids' name, should we?

---Speaking of children, I got to see the Dodgers beat Cy Young winner Tim Lincecum on Sunday.

---Talk about a creepy guy. He looks like Tim Burton's version of a major league pitcher.

---And he was also voted the male baseball player most likely to be mistaken for a lesbian tennis player.

---Major OCD for that kid. He bent down to tie his shoe on the mound three times every half inning.

---And still gave up five runs in four innings.

---I wanted to yell out to him. "Hey, Tim, you left your front door unlocked. You left the lights on. Her finger nails aren't perfectly shaped."

---Tickets to remaining New York Met home games are available on Stubhub for 89 cents.

---I thought scalping was illegal.

---As for my tickets, they are free to anybody who wants them.

---The woman who created eBay is running for California Governor.

---And that's an interesting way to raise state funds.

---The only trouble is just what does one do after they buy the Golden Gate Bridge? It's not like it will fit into your average garage.

---Maybe this lady can run for President in 2012. Then we can auction off New Orleans once and for all.

---This was ridiculous. The local morning TV news heralded "breaking news." I quickly paid attention, wondering what blew up.

"Rachael Ray's daily show is moving to a new time."

---Thanks for the heads up. I like to be prepared for any unexpected emergency.

Dinner last night: Breakfast for dinner. French toast at the Cafe 50s diner.