Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Back to School Wednesday

Kids who can figure out how to maneuver through this grid deserve a cash reward when they're done.

---Of course, at the end of the road, there will be nothing for them but higher taxes.

---There are probably some states in this union where the kindergarten block above is a lot bigger.

---Here's a useful barometer for those kids: when you start to grow facial hair, it's time to move on to the first grade. And your class valedictorian is Jethro Bodine.

---These are my teachable moments.

---The speech that Obama gave to school children was nice. And not exactly what it was supposed to be.

---Because, originally, the White House had asked that kids would also send along letters about what could be improved in the country.

---And you should also know that those letters would be used in tonight's speech on health care.

---"Dear Mr. President, my father's foot fell off. I wish we had better health care."

---Hello? Anyone?

---I made the mistake of commenting on Facebook that Urkel shouldn't talk to school children and I was lambasted by friends.

---I have no issue with a President talking to children. For Pete's sake, on 9/11, George Bush was reading a schoolbook to third graders about some goat.

---And just to show you that I can make jokes on both sides of the aisle...

---I wonder which kid had to sound the story out phonetically for Bush.

---See! I rarely do hate all politicians. But, I digress...

---If any President wants to discuss history or the Pledge of Allegience or barnyard animals to school children, that's fine. If he wants to use them as political pawns to advance any issue, that's not fine.

---Meanwhile, if the President refers to an HMO in a classroom, most of the kids will think he's talking about a breakfast oatmeal.

---Hello??? Anyone???

---Meanwhile, back on Planet Facebook again, there was a virtual town hall last week of folks posting the following:

---"Such and such thinks no one should die because they cannot afford health care and no one should go broke because they got sick. (If you agree, please post this as your status for the rest of the day)."

---This thing took off like a Cabbage Patch Kid on the day before Christmas.

---My question is: who doesn't?

---I love the fact that everybody is yakking up all the positives of the health care bill, even though they know about as much of what is in there as I do.

---Jeez Marie, even the President doesn't know what's in there.

---But the same folks who posted this on Facebook might be the same people who raise holy Hell when they have to pay 50 cents more for a BandAid.

---Because, whatever is in there, it will cost more money. Period. End of sentence.

---You want to solve health care in this country? Figure out who's clogging up the emergency rooms of any hospital on any given day.

---I have. When you spend as much time in ERs as I did with both my parents, you get a very clear picture.

---I'm also bemused about all the alleged "uninsured" folks in this country.

---Uh huh. I remember several years back when my company raised health premiums by twenty bucks.

---Most of the folks under 30 dropped coverage on their own because they didn't want to pay the increase.

These are the same kids who spend twenty bucks a paycheck on tall vanilla lattes and cigarettes.

---And last I looked, neither Starbucks or Phillip Morris were having price rollbacks.

---Hello???? Anybody????

---I guess it's time to get lighter.

Hello??? Anybody???

Dinner last night: Spaghetti and meatballs.

And tomorrow from the city that never sleeps. Unless, of course, if you're watching the Mets at Citi Field.

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