Monday Morning Video Laugh - April 30, 2018

Lawanda "Aunt Esther" Page was the best!

Dinner last night:  Meat pizza at Blaze Pizza.

The Sunday Memory Drawer - Me and Jon Voight

Here's a little statistic for your morbid curiosity.   I have two first cousins that I have not seen in over thirty years.   I have seen actor Jon Voight five times in that same time frame.  Roll that around in your head for a while.

One of us is stalking the other.  Or maybe it's just weird luck that I keep running into this guy, especially since he's originally from Yonkers, New York and went to high school at Stepinac in White Plains.  The coincidences are just plain strange.

The very first time was a flight I took to LA from NY before I was living on the West Coast,   For a reason that probably had everything to do with getting a cheaper air fare, I had to switch planes in Chicago.  And, in those days prior to me having "Million Mile" status with American Airlines, I had to wait patiently around the gate for my row to be called for boarding.  I was blankly staring at some terminal screen when a voice approached me from the left.

"Did they call 'Group 3' yet?"

God, I hate to be disturbed when I am blankly staring at some terminal screen.  So I was curt.   And said "no."  But there was something about the voice that was recognizable.   I turned to look.  It was him.  My face must have displayed a hint of recognition.  He smiled.

"I hate not getting a non-stop.  It's just another way for weather to delay your flight."

Oddly enough, they called our group at the same time.   Jon and I continued our small talky dialogue all the way down the jetway.   A flight attendant recognized him.   

Yes, Ma'am, this is Jon Voight.  And, yes, I know him.   Well, at least for the last 43 seconds.

I thought about mentioning Yonkers and the possibility that we might have shared the same dry cleaners.  But Len resorted to his usual stance when he runs into celebrities.  I don't really acknowledge and rarely make a fuss.   We parted company.  There was no suggestion to get together for lunch.

Calendar pages flying off and it is now several years later.   I have moved to Los Angeles.  I am at what used to be called the Avco Embassy movie theater in Westwood.  It is now called the iPic.  There are two pre-movie concession lines.  I am looking for a box of Goobers.  Again, the voice approaches me, this time from the right.

"Extra butter on my popcorn."

Yep, the Midnight Cowboy was back.    Hmmm, what are the odds that I would run into this guy twice??

Little did I know.

A while later, I am on a checkout line at Ralph's Supermarket in Westwood.   I am flipping through a copy of The National Enquirer which I naturally will not buy.  By now, I know the voice like I know my own.

"Where do you get your parking validated?"

He was directing the question to the checkout cashier next door, but he certainly could have asked me.   After all, aren't we friends by now?

Wait, there's more.

I was on a business trip flying American from LAX to JFK.   I had enjoyed an upgrade to first class, but it was a morning flight so I was still too groggy to make note of the passengers around me.   In my travels, I had previously flown in the front of the plane with the likes of Molly Shannon, Rob Reiner, Carson Kressley from that "Queer Eye" TV show (PS, he had bad body odor), the late Robert Pastorelli, and, of all folks, the late Geraldine Ferraro.  On this voyage, I noticed no one.

Until I was standing at baggage claim in JFK.  I looked up and HE was standing across from me, engrossed in his Black Berry.  

Okay, this is now getting ridiculous.

My fifth encounter happened just a year or so ago.  There is a bakery/sandwich shop near my apartment called "Clementine's."   The food is pretty nifty.   They have a BLT sandwich that I crave.  I went to the counter and placed my order.  I patiently waited for my sandwich and then I hear the voice.  In front of the display for the baked goods.

"IS THAT A BLUEBERRY SCONE?"

Yep, it was him.   And, this time, he was shouting to be noticed.   Or maybe he's just grown hard of hearing because it's probably 25 years since we first met.

"THAT BANANA MUFFIN.  DOES THAT HAVE NUTS IN IT??"

Yes, now everybody within a five mile radius knows it's you.  Most times, I refrained from saying something to him because I wanted to respect his privacy.  Now I didn't want to say anything for fear that the counter staff would think he and I were friends.

I can't wait for the next time he and I are together.   Or maybe I'll just be proactive and get a restraining order.

Meanwhile, speaking of Rob Reiner, I have had a similar experience with him and his dad, which I will describe on a future Sunday.

Dinner last night:  Bockwurst, kraut salad, and pickled beets.

Classic Movie Trailer of the Month - April 2018

Forty years old this month.   Well, at least, everybody remembers the song.

Dinner last night:  Assorted treats at the home of good friends Connie and Leo.

No, I Don't Find Cats Adorable

...and here's why.  Get a load of these ugly ass creatures.

Dinner last night:  Franks and beans.

Len's Recipe of the Month - April 2018

Of all the recipes I have loaded here, I am proudest of this one.   Why?  Because, for once, I didn't steal something from a Valerie Bertinelli cookbook.  Nope.   I improvised this beef onion soup completely on my own.   And I was astounded how good it tasted as I used all my recently-learned cooking skills to good effect.

And it all started very simply.   I had some celery stalks left over from my Oscar night turkey chili.   Okay, what do you usually make with celery?  Stew? Wasn't in the mood.  Chicken noodle soup?  Also not in the mood.   Wait.   I had some stew meat in the freezer.

It started to come together.   And here's how you do it.

Take about 1 pound and a half of stew beef and dredge with a little flour in a bowl.  Set aside.

In a Dutch onion, melt 1/2 stick of unsalted butter.  Add three to four sliced sweet onions.  Saute for about fifteen minutes.   Add two tablespoons cane sugar.   You want the onion to caramelize.   When they are brown and translucent, add two chopped celery stalks.   Mix it all around.   After ten more minutes, push the veggies to the side and add the beef.   Let that all brown together for about five minutes.   

Add a tablespoon of Kosher salt, a tablespoon of Worcestershire sauce, 1/4 cup of apple cider vinegar, and one 1/4 cup of cooking sherry.   Now pour in four cups of beef broth.   Lower your flame to simmer.   Cover and let it all come together for at least an hour.   If you want it to go even longer, that's better for an even more robust flavor.

You could serve it like this with some garnish of parsley.   I added shredded Parmesan to the top and it gave off that French onion soup gooey quality without having to use those special tureens.   I made some quick garlic toast and dipped that into the soup.   Even more delicious.

You're welcome.

Dinner last night:  Leftover tortellini.

This Date in History - April 25

Happy birthday, Godfather.

404 BC:  DURING THE PELOPONNESIAN WAR, LYSANDER'S SPARTAN ARMIES DEFEATED THE ATHENIANS AND THE WAR ENDS.

Peloponnesian?  Hmm.  Reminds me of that Honeymooners episodes where Ralph talks about a bunch of poloponies.

1134:  THE NAME ZAGREB WAS MENTIONED FOR THE FIRST TIME IN THE FELICIAN CHARTER RELATING TO THE ESTABLISHMENT OF THE ZAGREB BISHOPRIC AROUND 1094.

It's crap like that that explains why I never paid any attention in World History class.

1607:  DURING THE EIGHTY YEARS' WAR, THE DUTCH FLEET DESTROYS THE ANCHORED SPANISH FLEET AT GIBRALTAR.

Eighty years?   That's a lot of bullets.

1644:  THE CHONGZHEN EMPEROR, THE LAST EMPEROR OF MING DYNASTY CHINA, COMMITS SUICIDE DURING A PEASANT REBELLION LED BY LI ZICHENG.

Peasant rebellion?  Gee, Barry Sanders is old.

1792:  HIGHWAYMAN NICOLAS J. PELLETIER BECOMES THE FIRST PERSON EXECUTED BY GUILLOTINE.

Way a head of his time.

1792:  LA MARSEILLAISE (THE FRENCH NATIONAL ANTHEM) IS COMPOSED BY CLAUDE JOSEPH ROUGET DE LISLE.

I wonder if highwayman Pelletier ever got to hear it.

1829:  CHARLES FREMANTLE ARRIVES IN HMS CHALLENGER OFF THE COAST OF MODERN-DAY WESTERN AUSTRALIA PRIOR TO DECLARING THE SWAN RIVER COLONY FOR THE UNITED KINGDOM.

This is the Challenger ship that didn't blow up in space.

1846:  OPEN CONFLICT BEGINS OVER THE DISPUTED BORDER OF TEXAS, TRIGGERING THE MEXICAN-AMERICAN WAR.

And as if it was ripped from today's headlines.

1847:  THE LAST SURVIVORS OF THE DONNER PARTY ARE OUT OF THE WILDERNESS.

Frankly, in today's terms, you're never completely out of the woods.

1859:  BRITISH AND FRENCH ENGINEERS BREAK GROUND FOR THE SUEZ CANAL.

England and France working together?  Somebody calls Ripley's.

1861:  DURING THE CIVIL WAR, THE UNION ARMY ARRIVES IN WASHINGTON DC.

There goes any vacancies at the Holiday Inn.

1898:  THE UNITED STATES DECLARES WAR ON SPAIN.

I do it with Mexico every single time I go to my local car wash.

1901:  NEW YORK BECOMES THE FIRST US STATE TO REQUIRE AUTOMOBILE LICENSE PLATES.

So prisoners at Sing Sing finally have something to do during the day.

1916:  THE UNITED KINGDOM DECLARES MARTIAL LAW IN IRELAND.

Can you really blame them?

1917:  SINGER ELLA FITZGERALD IS BORN.

And one of her legs lived longer than the other.

1932:  BASKETBALL PLAYER MEADOWLARK LEMON IS BORN.

Jack's brother.

1939:  DC COMICS GIVES BIRTH TO BATMAN.

How did they ever get the Batmobile down that birth canal?

1940:  ACTOR AL PACINO IS BORN.

Just you think you're in the womb, they pull you right out.

1944:  THE UNITED NEGRO COLLEGE FUND IS INCORPORATED.

And it still exists.  Even with that now verboten word.

1945:  THE NAZI OCCUPATION ARMY SURRENDERS AND LEAVES NORTHERN ITALY.  BENITO MUSSOLINI'S PUPPET FASCIST REGIME DISSOLVES.

Bye, bye, Adolf.  Arrivederci, Benny.

1953:  FRANCIS CRICK AND JAMES D. WATSON PUBLISH "MOLECULAR STRUCTURE OF NUCLEIC ACIDS" DESCRIBING THE DOUBLE HELIX STRUCTURE OF DNA.

It's crap like this that explains why I never paid attention in Biology either.

1960:  THE US NAVY SUBMARINE USS TRITON COPLETES THE FIRST SUBMERGED CIRCUMNAVIGATION OF THE GLOBE.

Even Michael Phelps came up for air once in a while.

1972:  ACTOR GEORGE SANDERS DIES.

He killed himself.  All About Suicide.

1982:  ISRAEL COMPLETES ITS WITHDRAWAL FROM THE SINAI PENINSULA PER THE CAMP DAVID ACCORDS.

It wasn't worth the papyrus it was written on.

1983:  PIONEER 10 TRAVELS BEYOND PLUTO'S ORBIT.

Does Mickey and Goofy know about this?

1995:  GAME SHOW HOST ART FLEMING DIES.

Undertakers for $50.

1995:  ACTRESS GINGER ROGERS DIES.

Swing Time is up.

2007:  BORIS YELTSIN IS BURIED.

Hopefully it was after he died.

2009:  ACTRESS BEATRICE ARTHUR DIES.

God finally got you for that, Maude.

2010:  ACTRESS DOROTHY PROVINE DIES.

It's now a dead, dead, dead, dead world.

2015:  RIOTS BREAK OUT IN BALTIMORE FOLLOWING THE DEATH OF FREDDIE GRAY IN POLICE CUSTODY.

Just in case you thought it was because the Orioles won.

Dinner last night:   Had a big lunch so just a salad.

Fake Television

This is the character of President Dalton as portrayed by Keith Carradine on the very thoughtful and largely apolitical CBS drama "Madam Secretary."   He is the President of the United States.

But, wait, I watch some other shows that feature Chief Executives.

Here is President Tom Kirkman (Kiefer Sutherland) who rose to the office on "Designated Survivor" by literally being the last man standing after terrorists blew up the Capitol during the State of the Union address.

You want another one?

Here's President Keene (Elizabeth Marvel) the current sitting President on Showtime's "Homeland."  Her character is particularly interesting as it seems to envelop the very worst qualities of Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton. That's impossible to fathom.

I know there are other U.S. Presidents on television right now.  These three just happen to be on shows that I watch.   The interesting thing is what just happened to these three characters in the past three months.

In the plots for all three programs, all three of this Chief Executives just dealt with the prospect of the 25th Amendment being invoked.   You know, the Constitutional provision that allows for a sitting President to be replaced if his or her cabinet views them incompetent or unable to perform the duties of the office.

Dalton's woes started when he began to act irrationally.  As it turns out, he had a brain lesion that was making him be cuckoo.  After a little surgery and a few episodes off, Dalton reclaimed the office.

Kirkman's problems were a little deeper.  His wife, the First Lady, was killed in a car crash.   His resulting therapy grief sessions with a psychiatrist are leaked to the press and now everybody thinks he can't hold the office.

President Keene is a different issue altogether.   It seems nobody likes her and, oh, there might be some collusion with Russia.  Seriously.

So, what I am saying is that three different TV shows are using the very same plot line at the same time.  Uh huh.   Is that just plain coincidence?   Or are they trying to make a point.   And educate viewers about the 25th Amendment so that it can be used in the real world?

You be the judge.   I know television can form our viewpoints on a subliminal basis.   But this just might be the time when the whole medium jumps the proverbal shark.

Dinner last night:  Tortellini.

Monday Morning Video Laugh - April 23, 2018

A scene from a true sitcom classic episode.  The Odd Couple plays Password.

Dinner last night:  Chili dog at the Dodger game.

The Sunday Memory Drawer - The Third Mount Vernon Movie Theater

Many times on these viral pages, I have fondly recalled the movie theaters of my hometown, Mount Vernon, New York.  The two biggies were the RKO Proctor's and the Loews (pronounced "Lowees"), both situated in the downtown area and were literally a block away from each other.   These were wonderful palaces with three levels, lounges, and lobbies that featured the marvelous aroma of popping corn.

Since these theaters were in the downtown area, they were pretty much in the center of the city and were easily accessible by everybody.   From my house on South Fifteenth Avenue, it was an easy twenty minute walk to the movies.  I made the trip many times with my mom or my dad or my neighborhood buddies.  Some combination of that did that at least once a week when I was eight or nine or ten years old.

But there was the legend that there was a third movie theater in Mount Vernon.  As I always scanned the movie pages of the Daily News or the local Daily Argus, I would see it show up in the section where they listed "show times."   Hmmm.

I remember asking my dad.   What's this theater in Mount Vernon called "The Parkway?"  He responded by resorting to one of his tried-and-true answers to my many questions.

"It's too far."

So was everything.   

Indeed, I guess my father considered the Parkway as if it were on the moon. Realistically, it was on the north side of Mount Vernon in the city section called Fleetwood.  The theater didn't have all the marquee lights and gaudiness that RKO or Loews had.   Actually, it looked like just another store front nestled amongst a bunch of other...well...store fronts.

Now my mother didn't necessarily have an aversion to distance as she liked to get around Mount Vernon via Tony Maurino's cab company.  So it would be her who brought me to my virgin visit at the Parkway.  On a school night, nonetheless.   It was my birthday and she had gathered a few of my school friends and their mothers for the exclusive Westchester showing of "Mary Poppins."

As I walked into this movie theater, it certainly didn't look like the ones I had been going to before.   It was one level.   The lobby was nice but certainly not opulent.  You had to go downstairs for the bathrooms.

And also the lounge, which was amazing because it had this ultra-mod circular couch.   I had never seen anything like it.   It gave the Parkway a cozy style that the other bigger places couldn't achieve because of their size.

I always thought the Parkway was a fairly new theater.  For this blog, I did a little research and discovered it was a bit older than I thought when I was ten.  I mean, the films in this ad came out in the mid to late 40s.

The visits to the Parkway were few and far between, until I became a teenager and my friends and I would walk anywhere in town.   It was probably a four mile hike from my house to the Parkway, but my buddies and I would do it if they had something we wanted to see.   I can remember going with my best neighborhood friend Leo to see "The Exorcist" when it came out.   

When I was an adult, the Parkway Theater used to feature movies that had just finished their initial runs at the bigger theaters.   So it was a perfect place to catch up with something you had missed.   I think one such film was "Ferris Bueller's Day Off."   There were others.   And, every time I went, I made a trip to the lounge downstairs where that circular and enormous sofa still had a home.  

The Parkway lasted into the late 80s and had existed long after the two downtown showplaces had shuttered in the late 60s.  But, inevitably, all good things come to an end and the Parkway probably lost its life to the mega movieplexes on Central Avenue in Yonkers.

Ironically, the facade is still there, but, instead, of next week's feature, there is a board listing who is reposing in what room.  Yep, all the Mount Vernon funeral homes had merged into one conglomerate and taken over the Parkway.
When it was a movie theater, this was the entrance way.

It looked very similar today as a mortuary.   But, oh, so different.

I actually want to have an excuse to go there now.   Not only to relive memories, but to address my nagging question...

Is the circular sofa still there?

Dinner last night:  Sausage pizza from Maria's.

Classic TV Theme Song of the Month - April 2018

The TV Tarzan looked like he just got out of college.

Dinner last night:  Had a big lunch so just a sandwich.

Your Weekend Movie Guide for April 2018

Well, Easter was a little early this year.   It was usually April when my mother would make the unfamiliar trek on the subways from Mount Vernon, New York to take me to the Easter show at Radio City Music Hall.   She really loved the "Glory of Easter" stage show.   She wasn't going to church these days, but she would never miss this presentation.   Another great example of something that is not there anymore.

What are the big cinematic attractions this April?  You know the drill, gang. I'll sift through the entertainment pages of the Los Angeles Times and give you my knee jerk reaction to what's out there.

Looking at this ad, I barely remember this Disney movie.   But it's still likely to be ten times better than anything playing in 2018.

Beirut:   I remember Eddie Murphy's old joke on SNL.  "Beirut?   The guy on the Yankees?"

Ready Player One:  Lots of video game folks ran to see this.   I am not so I did not.

Lean on Pete:   I hear great things about this boy and his horse tale.

A Quiet Place:  A horror movie that features virtually no dialogue.   Because if you speak, the monsters kill you.   If only this was real life.

Blockers:  Parents dealing with their 16-year-old daughters' contest on losing virginity.  By the way, it is allegedly a comedy.

Sweet Country: An Aboriginal man goes on the run after he kills a white man in self-defense.  When does the sweet stuff come in?

Isle of Dogs:   Animated and the trailer seemed stupid.   Woof.

You Were Never Really Here:  Okay, I won't be.

The Death of Stalin:   A great comedy about the death of the dictator.   Laughs aplenty.  I mean it.

Finding Your Feet:    On the eve of retirement a middle class, a judgmental snob discovers her husband has been having an affair with her best friend and is forced into exile with her bohemian sister who lives on an impoverished inner-city council estate.  And say that three times fast.

The Rider:  A true story about a young rodeo star who suffers a head injury after falling off his horse.   Christopher Reeve should have taken note.

Chappaquiddick:  Reviewed here the other day.   An annoying reminder about how dumb Teddy Kennedy...and subsequently the state of Massachusetts...were.

Where Is Kyra:  Michelle Pfeiffer is a fragile woman is already stressed from a fast-paced world when her mother dies and she must find a means for survival while hiding her struggles from her new boyfriend.  Kiefer Sutherland is the boyfriend and any of his love interests are immediately doomed.

The Leisure Seeker:   Helen Mirren and Donald Sutherland find romance. Great to see father and son working.

Rampage:   Dwayne Johnson as....oh, who am I kidding?

Tomb Raider:  Who is Lara Croft and why does she get movies made about her?

I Can Only Imagine:  There's no logline so I guess the title is appropriate.

The Miracle Season:  A high school girls' volleyball team loses its star player to a tragic accident.   So this is not about the 1969 Mets?

Sherlock Gnomes:  Gnome way.

Black Panther:  Been there, hated that.

Acrimony:  Tyler Perry's latest...and who am I kidding again?

Love, Simon:   A gay teenager looks for love.   Just like Andy Hardy except he was straight.

Super Troopers 2:  A second one??  Already???

Dolphins:  Another Disney nature movie...this one about...guess?  Flipper's attorney on line 3.

Duck Duck Goose:  A cartoon feature about...guess again?

The House of Tomorrow:  A 16-year-old lives with Grandma (Ellen Burstyn) in a geodesic dome.   Astroturf optional.

Ghost Stories:   These titles are getting too easy.

Gray Matter:  Aliens walk the country.  Build the wall.  Oh, wait...different aliens.

Let's Kill Grandpa This Christmas:  Just so you know this title isn't a metaphor, the family really wants to kill him this Christmas.

Little Pink House:  A small-town paramedic.   Sounds more like a TV series on Lifetime.

I Feel Pretty:  An Amy Schumer comedy.  For me, that's always a tragedy.

Kodachrome:  Ed Harris and Jason Sudeikis play a father and son on the road looking to develop a roll of film.   Where's a Fotomat when you need one?

Dinner last night:  Hot dog at Shake Shack.

American Eye Dull

What goes around...well, you know.

Back in 2007, when I first started this blog, one of the major features was my weekly review of the proceedings on the then-Fox show "American Idol."  It was so much fun to be snarky about the program.   And, frankly, during those years, America was consumed with all things Idol.  You had your favorites.  You waited anxiously to hear what Simon Cowell had to say.   I will even admit to having dialed in with a vote from time to time.

Pretty quickly, I lost interest and eventually so did the rest of the country.   As soon as Cowell left, the judges lost their bite and the ensuing conga line of the likes of Jennifer Lopez and Keith Urban were as uninteresting as the contestants.

I also started to realize that the show was incredibly manipulative to the extent of being practically rigged.  I mean, how is that they always managed to find some sob story amongst the early contestants and then that person managed to go to the top 12.   It seemed way too convenient.

When Idol went off the air two years ago, I might have watched the final episode for old time's sake.  Or maybe I didn't.  That's how memorable it all had become for me.

But, in 2018 where prime time television has probably just four or five useful ideas, ABC chose to resurrect Idol because "America was clamoring for it."  If they were, it was the quietest clamoring in history.   Perhaps it was all conjured up because people were distressed that Ryan Seacrest actually had less than five full time jobs on television.   I know I was worried that there might be an hour or two of the day without Ryan.

I was more than a little disgusted that ABC brought Idol back at all.  You see, I had a friend whose hour-long drama was all set to make it to the schedule. Except, once the network struck a deal with Idol, they needed to clear three or four hours of the prime time schedule for it.   There went some pretty promising shows.   There went my friend's program.  

I have been watching the ratings since Idol came back and I noticed that all the clamoring isn't being translated to audience metrics.  To say that nobody seems to care is an understatement.

But, I was curious enough to watch a couple of weeks in a row.   And, boy, was I sorry I did.

First off, the whole thing seems to be as mechanical as it ever was.   Some people might like to wear an old sweater.   The problem is that this version of Idol is moth-eaten, right down to Seacrest's overly amped "dim the lights."

Then there is the manipulation of the audience with the absolutely saddest stories from contestants.   Here's somebody born with just one leg and one arm.  Prop them and they will sing their heart out covering some Adele ballad. It's amazing how the producers manage to find those tales.   And then, once again, the same contestants somehow succeed.   Ugh.

Perhaps the worst part of this new iteration is the judging crew.   It's headed by Lionel Ritchie and he's obviously involved to pay off some extensive plastic surgery bills.  Then there's Luke Bryan and I will wait a moment while you stifle a yawn.

And then there's Katy Perry who is a complete idiot.   The major problem is that, unlike the original judges, Perry has totally forgotten that she's not the star of the show.   All her critiques are essentially all about her.  When one young and good looking metal rocker did his number, her histrionics were embarrassing up to the point where she pretended to faint on the stage.   The sad part is that somebody took the time to revive her.

I doubt I'll watch any more of "American Idol," but I also realize I will likely be drawn to the finale out of sheer boredom.   And I will lament whoever made the decision that America was actually dying to see more of this mess.   

But then there are folks out there who like to rubberneck car crashes.

Dinner last night:  Hamburger.

This Date in History - April 18

Happy birthday in Heaven to Perry Mason's favorite secretary.  She just passed a little while ago.

1025:  BOLESLAW CHROBRY IS CROWNED IN GNIEZNO, BECOMING THE FIRST KING OF POLAND.

This is the second time the name "Boleslaw" has shown up here in a month and I simply can't resort to the coleslaw gag again.

1506:  THE CORNERSTONE OF THE CURRENT ST. PATER'S BASILICA IS LAID.

I didn't even know the cornerstone was sexually active.

1518:  BONA SFORZA IS CROWNED AS QUEEN CONSORT OF POLAND.

Bona Sforza sounds like a treat for Italian dogs.

1636:  ENGLISH JUDGE JULIUS CAESAR DIES.

Clever name your folks gave you, Julie.

1689: BOSTONIANS RISE UP IN REBELLION AGAINST ST. EDMUND ANDROS.

Andros must have been a Yankee fan.

1775:  DURING THE AMERICAN REVOLUTION, PAUL REVERE AND OTHER RIDES WARN THE COUNTRYSIDE OF THE TROOP MOVEMENTS.

One lone voice from a home on the way:  Shaddap!  You woke the baby!

1831:  THE UNIVERSITY OF ALABAMA IS FOUNDED.

Where the tusks are looser.

1848:  AMERICAN VICTORY AT THE BATTLE OF CERRO GORDO OPENS THE WAY FOR INVASION OF MEXICO.

Back when the invasion was going south and not the other way around.

1881:  BILLY THE KID ESCAPES FROM THE LINCOLN COUNTY JAIL IN NEW MEXICO.

Who let the kid out?  Whoop, whoop, whoop.  Who let the kid out?  Whoop, whoop, whoop.

1906:  AN EARTHQUAKE AND FIRE DESTROY MUCH OF SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA.

I left my heart...and a whole lot of other body parts....in San Francisco.

1907:  MOVIE COMPOSER MIKLOS ROZSA IS BORN.

He did the fantastic score for "Ben-Hur," among hundreds of others.

1912:  THE CUNARD LINER "CARPATHIA"  BRINGS 705 SURVIVORS FROM THE "TITANIC" TO NEW YORK CITY.

Leonardo DiCaprio was not one of them.

1922:  ACTRESS BARBARA HALE IS BORN.

Made it all the way to 95.   She didn't get cheated.

1923:  YANKEE STADIUM OPENS.

The first one.  Just in case you didn't realize that.

1924:  SIMON AND SCHUSTER PUBLISHES THE FIRST CROSSWORD PUZZLE BOOK.

Finally people have something to do during long hospital stays.

1930:  BBC RADIO ANNOUNCES THAT THERE IS NO NEWS ON THIS DAY.

Well, that's good news.

1934:  ACTOR JAMES DRURY IS BORN.

TV's Virginian!!!!

1942:  DURING WORLD WAR II, JAPAN IS BOMBED DURING THE DOOLITTLE RAID.

That's hardly doing little.

1942:  BASEBALL PITCHER STEVE BLASS IS BORN.

And that's outside.  Ball four.

1945:  JOURNALIST ERNIE PYLE IS KILLED.

Now under one.

1946:  ACTRESS HAYLEY MILLS IS BORN.

I once saw her in the waiting room for an ultrasound.

1953:  ACTOR RICK MORANIS IS BORN.

Mommy, I shrunk your uterus.

1954:  GAMAL ABDAL NASSER SEIZES POWER IN EGYPT.

Several years before he started the United States' space program.

1955:  PHYSICIST ALBERT EINSTEIN DIES.

Well, there goes the Math club.

1958:  A UNITED STATES FEDERAL COURT RULES THAT POET EXRA POUND BE RELEASED FROM AN INSANE ASYLUM.

Having already gotten his pound of flesh.

1961:  ACTRESS JANE LEEVES IS BORN.

Daphne!!

1981:  THE LONGEST PROFESSIONAL BASEBALL GAME IS BEGUN IN PAWTUCKET, RHODE ISLAND.  THE GAME IS COMPLETED ON JUNE 23.

A tip of the cap to all those who stayed and had to go to work the next morning.

2002:  EXPLORER THOR HEYERDAHL DIES.

Kon-No-More-Tiki.

2002:  WRESTLER/PRO FOOTBALL PLAYER WAHOO MCDANIEL DIES.

I know of only one blog reader who will smile when he reads this.

2007:  THE SUPREME COURT OF THE UNITED STATES UPHOLDS THE PARTIAL-BIRTH ABORTION BAN ACT IN A 5-4 DECISION.

What the hell is a partial birth anyway?  The feet come out and the head stays in for a couple of years?

2012:  TV PERSONALITY DICK CLARK DIES.

Casket.   Flowers.   Mourners.  I got it.  "Things at a Funeral."

Dinner last night:  Leftover steak and tomatoes.

Bridge Ahead

One more time, my Kennedy family infatuation continues.

First off, I've often thought of the 3 political Kennedy brothers as the Corleone family.   JFK was most like Michael, a bit ruthless but always able to cover it up behind a genuine persona.   Bobby was most like Sonny, doing the heavy hitting and also perhaps the one with the most mistresses.   And then there's Teddy, the true doppelganger for dumb schmuck Fredo.   

The new movie "Chappaquiddick" reminds me of the Fredo connection and totally reinforces it in my mind.   Jeez, Teddy Kennedy was a fucking idiot.

I guess you have to be over 45 and picked up a history book over that time to even know what the Chappaquiddick incident was.   On the 1969 weekend when man was first landing on the moon, Teddy and all his sycophants were boozing it on an island near Edgartown, Massachusetts.   They had a lot of the young girl campaign workers with them...wink, wink.   Well, Teddy and one of those chicks, Mary Jo Kopechne, left early...wink, wink.  Were they having an affair?  It's not really clear.   Allegedly, she was carrying his child.   That was never proven, unless you read the National Enquirer.

Well, anyway, Teddy's in a liquor haze and drives their car off a lonely bridge. The car submerges.   He gets out.   She drowns.   And then he spends the next nine hours trying to figure out his story and his future Presidential aspirations.

It's interesting to watch this film today in light of all the Trump nonsense with Stormy Daniels, Access Hollywood, etc..,   Because as sordid as that is all supposed to be, none of it holds a candle to the Machiavellian machinations Teddy and his gaggle of advisers used to cover up the truth here.   Not only are they sinister but some of the moments are downright hilarious.    I mean, the audience I was with was laughing out loud along with me.  Indeed, Teddy's wife makes a brief appearance and gets to utter one line of dialogue.

"Go fuck yourself, Teddy."

That single utterance is totally worth the price of admission.

Director John Curran was only nine years old when this all happened and the screenwriters weren't even born.   And, like those behind the movie "Jackie," they manage to get all the authenticity right.  If "Chappaquiddick" plays out a little clinically, that's not their fault.   It is the ultimate vagueness of what really happened that plays against them.  But still, my Google refreshment of my memory tells me that what is depicted here is pretty much close to the truth.

There are gaps, however.   The actual status of their affair and Mary Jo's possible pregnancy are glossed over.   Additionally, in any movie around the Kennedy family, the total absence of mother Rose was quite noticeable to me and several of my fellow audience members discussed just that on the way out.

Of course, we do get Bruce Dern as a drooling Joseph Kennedy, whose major appearance here is to croak out the word "alibi" and then slap his dim witted son.

One of the best things about this movie is the performance of Jason Clarke as Teddy.  Whereas lesser actors would do this as an impersonation, Clarke lays off the exaggerated mannerisms and, as a result, provides a more genuine portrayal.  

The now requisite historical update just before the end credits reminds all of the ultimate irony from this sinister crime.   Ted Kennedy never left the Senate.   As a matter of fact, the state of Massachusetts mysteriously kept reelecting this criminal until his bloated, boozed-up body finally quit in 2009.  

Some people talk about the Kennedys being cursed.   But the fact that this jerk kept his Senate job for another forty years, I would say this Kennedy was damn lucky.

I guess that's kind of anti-Fredo Corleone.

LEN'S RATING:  Three stars.

Dinner last night:  Ribeye steak and pan roasted tomatoes in balsamic jam.