Several years ago, when rookie infielder and then-Dodger Chin-Lung Hu first got into a game, the great Vin Scully made this comment on the air as Hu was inserted at first base as a pinch runner.
"Well, Hu's on first. And we will leave it at that."
So, in the spirit of Mr. Scully, this month's moronic salute will not go into obvious territories. Okay, one gag may slip in there, but I will do my best not to stray into the easy jokes. As hard as that may be. And, considering our monthly tip of the moron cap this June is Congressman Anthony Weiner, that last line could be mistaken for a double entendre as it is.
What a tool. And, no, that's not a joke either. Indeed, the well-publicized exploits of this scumbag of a politician don't need to be recounted here. No guy with that last name should ever be caught in such a mis-named mess in a public forum because we really do want Jay Leno's writing staff to work harder to come up with his monologue. If Anthony's last name was Edelstein or Jones, the one-liners don't come as fast and furiously.
But, still, this shithead had no business doing what he was doing. Pure and simple. Allegedly, he has New York City mayoral aspirations and they have now gone the way of the Automat and the Long Island Press. When he finally gets the inevitable push out of Congress, this schmuck will have a tough guy getting a job anywhere except as an expert commentator on CNN, which is the official future home of all scandalized Democrats.
Obviously, Weiner wasn't getting enough of his jollies met from his new wife, who apparently works for Hillary Clinton and should know by now how a woman can expertly grab and squeeze a husband's scrotum. But, from the photos, Mrs. Weiner is no Da Vinci painting either and has the schnozzola of a gas pump down at your local Sunoco station.
So, I guess you can say a guy's got to do what a guy's got to do. Except this guy's supposedly one of our more respected civic leaders, even though he was perhaps one of the most annoying Liberal mouthpieces out there. Personally, everytime I heard him regurgitating the usual White House talking points like a parrot, I secretly wished Weiner would go away. Very soon, we will all be so lucky.
The only problem is that there will be somebody else right behind him. Another scum sucker who asks for our trust and then abuses it. Because when it comes to sleazy politicians, America will never be operating at a deficit. Dirtbags who measure themselves not in actions for their voting public, but in inches for the slut down the street.
Weiner is just one of many. Hell, how many of them have even been in the Oval Office? Bill Clinton who I hear is still violating a woman's personal space to this day. Jack and Bobby Kennedy who actually took turns fucking the same woman. Hell, even Dwight Eisenhower had himself a little tootsie, just in case you thought it was just his golf balls that were being played with during his administration.
Outside the White House, the list gets longer. Of course, there was that big hunk of shit, Teddy Kennedy, who screwed around and was a drunken driver/murderer to boot. How about that Gary Condit? Yeah, he's the one who was fooling around with that intern, Chandra Levy, who wound up dead in a pile of leaves. Mark Foley? He chose to mess around with Congressional pages and didn't necessarily use a certain gender as a dividing line.
Can I keep going? Sure can, like I just took some Viagra for Typists. There's future jail resident John Edwards. He was running for President, for God's sake, while he was lying about paternity tests. Forget the fact that his wife's hair was falling out in clumps at the same time. Ooops, let's not neglect Arnold. Impregnating a butt-ugly housekeeper and somebody really needs to change her job description. Talk about your Merry Maids.
So, despite what the Twitter pictures show, Anthony Weiner is nothing special. And nothing new.
And there will be others. I have friends who have fully expected to see some woman come forward and admit to a fling with our current President. Let's face it. He has all the same personality traits. Arrogance. The belief that he is above the law. And a big mouthed pain in the ass at home.
You know publications like the National Enquirer have been investigating the President since he first rose to prominence in the south side of Chicago. All they need is the voice to come forward. I doubt it will happen during his White House tenure but just watch what happens during his first year out of office. She'll be out there and explain away all those idle hours when you thought he was off playing basketball. There are extra points if the babe turns out to be White.
And, you know what? Nobody will care. Oh, there will be hand wringing and cries for civility and decency.
Uh huh. And then we will vote for them all over again.
Dinner last night: Chicken and rice.
No comments:
Post a Comment