Loglines Don't Lie

 

This is one of those movies that you know what you are getting five hours before it starts.   But, sometimes, that kind of cinematic familiarity is just what you need as we all head back to the sanctity of our local theaters.   Indeed, the elevator pitch and logline for this film comes from an actual line of dialogue in it.

"They're like Mean Girls with medical alert bracelets."

And there you have everything about "Queen Bees" in one compact hive.  I totally knew what I was in for and that's okay.   I like Jane Curtin.   I like Loretta Devine.  I absolutely love Ann-Margret.   This was going to be a big old comfort food meat loaf on the silver screen.   

And there are days when that's all you need.

Ellen Burstyn is the main senior citizen here.   Recently widowed, her daughter would like Mom to sell the house.   The opportunity arises when Ellen almost burns down the kitchen.   While the damage is being repaired, she has to go and live in a seniors assisted living facility for a month.   While there, she runs into a nasty bridge club run by a bullying Jane Curtin, a wisecracking Loretta Devine, and a randy Ann-Margret who has designs on new resident Christopher Lloyd wearing a dead squirrel on his head.

Got that?

Of course, Ellen doesn't fit in with her new friends until she does.   She also finds romance with another oldster played by James Caan...clearly light years away from Sonny Corleone at the Jones Beach toll booth.   You know they won't hit it off until they do.  In "Queen Bees," efficiently directed by Michael Lembeck, everything is going to happen just as you expect.   There will be dementia and a stroke and arguments and death and...

You get the picture.   Despite this being as predictable as wet water, there is something very soothing and relaxing about "Queen Bees."   Perhaps it's simply the ability to enjoy some well known actors doing what they do best.  In an era where every Hollywood movie seeks to be darker than the next, it is refreshing to simply be entertained and come out of the theater smiling.

Even if the logline is as simplistic as this one.   Buzz around "Queen Bees."   You'll get stung but it won't hurt.

LEN'S RATING:  Three stars.

Dinner last night:  Hot dog at Petco Park.