And The Stimulus Money Goes To....

Even I can get tired coming up with funny stuff for this blog on a daily basis. Today, I'm going to outsource the humor.

Here are some real-life factoids on where your tax dollars have been going, courtesy of the stimulus plan. Be aware that federal agencies are right now spending stimulus bucks at the rate of $196 million per hour. Even my mother couldn't match that pace.

The lucky recipients of your hard-earned dough are:

$233,000 to the University of California at San Diego to study why Africans vote. The number of jobs created? Twelve, but seven of those are Africans living in Africa.

$2 million in Nevada to build a new fire station. Except, because of budget cuts, the county involved can't afford to hire firefighters to work there.

Penn State University got $1.5 million to study plant fossils in Argentina. Of five jobs created, 2 belongs to Argentines.

Researchers at SUNY-Buffalo got $389,000 to pay 100 Buffalo residents $45 each to record how much malt liquor they drink and how much pot they smoke each day.

The White House has authorized $5 billion to weatherize homes. But one Texas county spent $4 million to weatherize just 47 homes. That's $78,000 per house. Each retrofit is supposed to save homeowners $500 a year in energy costs. That mean taxpayers will recoup their investment in just 156 years.

Two Arizona universities got almost one million dollars for three grad students to study how ants work. That's more than $300,000 per grad student.

Companies that raise tropical fish, shellfish, catfish, alligators and turtles can qualify for $50 million in tax money to buy fish food.

North Carolina public schools received $4.4 million to hire math and literacy coaches. Not for students, but for the teachers. That's 64 people paid $70,000 each to teach teachers how to teach reading and math.

There's some tourist device called the Napa Valley Wine Train. The county received $54 million to build a railroad bridge, relocated a half-mile of track, and build a flood wall to protect a wine train passenger station. The no-bid contract went to a minority-owned business operated by an Eskimo tribe outside Anchorage. But, wait, there's more. The company then hired a real constuction company for a fraction of what they were paid by the government to actually do the work. But, wait, there's even more. The tribe's CEO has no construction experience. His last business, a website for sailors, went bankrupt after spending $13 million in investor money.

Six million dollars of stimulus money went to a California contractor who happens to be under federal investigation for overcharging the city of San Diego during the cleanup after the 2007 wildfires.

A Denver developer received $13 million in tax credits to help build a senior housing complex despite being sued as a slumlord for running decrepit, rodent-infested apartment buildings in San Francisco.

Kentucky gave $24 million to a contractor on trial for bribery.

An aerospace company received $15 million to monitor water quality in a Ventura County creek it was already fined for polluting.

Gee, this just may be the funniest stuff I have ever posted in this blog.

Dinner last night: German salami sandwich and tomato soup.