If I Tweeted - October 2013

I don't, you know.  But if I did, here's what I would have tweeted in the month just passed.

#LenSpeaks  The Federal Government is closed.  Just in case you don't notice.

#LenSpeaks  But doesn't it do the same thing every Saturday and Sunday?  And lots of Mondays every year?

#LenSpeaks  All those poor employees will probably get back pay for time off.  So, a forced vacation in October can be really nice.

#LenSpeaks  Is there not a SNL moment that isn't read off cue cards?  

#LenSpeaks  You see the hosts reading their monologue every week.  When do they actually show up?  At 11:15PM??

#LenSpeaks Did a hashtag use to have drug prices back in the 70s?

#LenSpeaks  The Dodgers are in the playoffs and I am delighted.  Rooting for the Mets, you can start making winter plans on July 23.

#LenSpeaks  TBS coverage of the baseball playoffs is so bad.  I'm expecting to see the credit --- Executive Producer:  Kathleen Sebelius.

#LenSpeaks  Healthcare.Gov launch is the Titanic on dry land.

#LenSpeaks   The website is as sick as some of the uninsured are healthy.

#LenSpeaks  Obama says he's going to bring in the best and the brightest to fix it.   That smells like a call to the Geek Squad.

#LenSpeaks  Obamacare doing just the opposite of what he pledged.   There will be more uninsured people in 2014.

#LenSpeaks  If there is less money going to health care companies, gee, won't there be less dough available to develop new and powerful drugs?

#LenSpeaks   Obama's speeches should come with the sitcom opening.  "Taped in front of a live studio audience."

#LenSpeaks   I went to three baseball playoff games in three consecutive games.  Have not done that since the Mets were in the 2000 World Series.

#LenSpeaks  Come to think of it, the Mets haven't done that since 2000 either.

#LenSpeaks  Joe Buck and Tim McCarver will be doing a Cardinal World Series.  Mute your TVs now.

#LenSpeaks  Five minutes into Game 1 in Fenway Park and I'm already throwing up.

#LenSpeaks  Okay, as horrific as it was, the Marathon bombing was months ago.  Shelf life expired.

#LenSpeaks  Fantasy baseball battery mates:  Boston Red Sox pitcher Jon Lester throwing to catcher Willie Tyler.

#LenSpeaks  Fenway Park has a Pesky Pole.  I thought that was Lech Walesa.

#LenSpeaks  James Taylor screwed up the Game 2 National Anthem.  Would have been a bigger deal thirty years ago when he was still relevant.

#LenSpeaks  Pitcher Michael Wacha is one of those phenoms who will be a World Series hero one year and a 120 day disabled list name the next.

#LenSpeaks  I caught the new Sean Hayes sitcom.  Damn, I thought I was vaccinated for that.

#LenSpeaks  RIP Marcia Wallace AKA Carol Kester AKA Edna Krabappel AKA the bottom right seat on the Match Game.

#LenSpeaks  Said hello to her once in Macy's.   You couldn't miss that hair.

#LenSpeaks  RIP Lou Reed.  Now walking on a much tamer side.  

#LenSpeaks  A bad baseball combination:  The Boston Red Sox and World Series games that end on October 26.

#LenSpeaks  Non-news:  Chris Brown arrested for assault.

#LenSpeaks  If he had that many hits on a baseball field, he'd be Pete Rose.

#LenSpeaks  Hopefully, with three Series wins in a decade, Red Sox fans will finally stop their whining.

#LenSpeaks  When did Bill O'Reilly corner the market on books about killing people.  Killing Lincoln.  Killing Kennedy.  Killing Jesus.  It's all Killing Trees.

#LenSpeaks  CBS to do spinoff called "How I Met Your Father."  I have an idea for one that should be shot at Citi Field.  "How I Fathered a Met."  

Dinner last night:  The salad bar from Gelson's.