176: EMPEROR MARCUS AURELIUS GRANTS HIS SON COMMODUS THE RANK OF IMPERATOR.
Commodus? Later the toilet bowl?
395: RUFINUS, PRAETORIAN PREFECT OF THE EAST, IS MURDERED BY GOTHIC MERCENARIES.
Well, nobody is prefect.
602: EMPEROR MAURICE IS FORCED TO WATCH HIS FIVE SONS BE EXECUTED BEFORE BEING BEHEADED HIMSELF.
Well, that's a lot of news for their upcoming Christmas newsletter.
1095: POPE URBAN II DECLARES THE FIRST CRUSADE AT THE COUNCIL OF CLERMONT.
What was this Pope's last name? Blight? Legend?
1295: THE FIRST ELECTED REPRESENTATIVES FROM LANCASHIRE ARE CALLED TO WESTMINSTER BY KING EDWARD I TO ATTEND A "MODEL PARLIAMENT."
As opposed to a "model Winston" or a "model Newport."
1727: THE FOUNDATION STONE TO THE JERUSALEM'S CHURCH IN BERLIN IS LAID.
So even stones can be sluts.
1830: ST. CATHERINE LABOURE EXPERIENCES A VISION OF THE BLESSED BIRGIN STANDING ON A GLOBE, CRUSHING A SERPENT WITH HER FEET, AND EMANATING RAYS OF LIGHT FROM HER HANDS.
That's a little too specific for me.
1835: JAMES PRATT AND JOHN SMITH ARE HANGED IN LONDON. THEY ARE THE LAST TWO TO BE EXECUTED FOR SODOMY IN ENGLAND.
The ones that followed were all elected into government.
1839: IN BOSTON, MASSACHUSETTS, THE AMERICAN STATISTICAL ASSOCIATION IS FOUNDED.
And, on this day, somebody starts with the number 1.
1863: DURING THE AMERICAN CIVIL WAR, UNION FORCES UNDER GENERAL GEORGE MEADE POSITION AGAINST TROOPS FROM THE SOUTH.
Also under the General---Mrs. Meade.
1868: UNITED STATES ARMY LIEUTENANT COLONEL GEORGE ARMSTRONG CUSTER LEADS AN ATTACK ON CHEYENNE.
Pissing them off for a future last stand.
1895: IN PARIS, ALFRED NOBEL SIGNS HIS LAST WILL AND TESTAMENT, SETTING ASIDE HIS ESTATE TO ESTABLISH THE NOBEL PRIZE.
This used to be a big deal when they announced the winners. But when they gave it to Durward Kirby, I was done.
1916: SPORTSCASTER CHICK HEARN IS BORN.
Who names their kid "Chick?"
1917: TV HOST BUFFALO BOB SMITH IS BORN.
And I looked it up. He really was born in Buffalo.
1924: IN NEW YORK CITY, THE FIRST MACY'S THANKSGIVING DAY PARADE IS HELD.
And the very first balloon was Felix the Cat. For those in the American Statistical Association who are keeping track.
1925: ACTOR MARSHALL THOMPSON IS BORN.
TV's Daktari!!!
1934: BANK ROBBER BABY FACE NELSON DIES IN A SHOOTOUT WITH THE FBI.
He had the cutest little.....
1940: ACTOR BRUCE LEE IS BORN.
A chop off the old block.
1942: DURING WORLD WAR II, THE FRENCH NAVY SCUTTLES ITS SHIPS AND SUBMARINES TO KEEP THEM OUT OF NAZI HANDS.
It never ceases to amaze me how cowardly the French are.
1942: ROCK STAR JIMI HENDRIX IS BORN.
Everybody say "high."
1945: ACTRESS BARBARA ANDERSON IS BORN.
She disappeared after only a few years on television. Another woman that I had wished was my mother.
1953: PLAYWRIGHT EUGENE O'NEILL DIES.
A long day's journey into casket.
1954: ALGER HISS IS RELEASED FROM PRISON AFTER SERVING 44 MONTHS FOR PERJURY.
Boo Hiss.
1957: AUTHOR CAROLINE KENNEDY IS BORN.
So, yes, her birthday was ruined six years later.
1965: THE PENTAGON TELLS US PRESIDENT LYNDON JOHNSON THAT IF PLANNED OPERATIONS ARE TO SUCCEED, THE NUMBER OF AMERICAN TROOPS IN VIETNAM HAD TO BE QUADRUPLED.
And, stupid fool that he was, he listened to them.
1968: PENNY ANN EARLY BECAME THE FIRST WOMAN TO PLAY MAJOR PROFESSIONAL BASKETBALL IN AN ABA GAME.
She's still with us so she's not yet the late Penny Ann Early.
1973: THE US SENATE VOTES 92 TO 3 TO CONFIRM GERALD FORD AS VICE PRESIDENT.
And the three were?
1978: IN SAN FRANCISCO, CITY MAYOR GEORGE MOSCONE AND GAY CITY SUPERVISOR HARVEY MILK ARE KILLED BY FORMER SUPERVISOR DAN WHITE.
Don't cry over spilled Moscone.
1981: SINGER LOTTE LENYA DIES.
The big villain versus James Bond in "From Russia With Love." Oh, yeah, and she did a bunch of other stuff.
1990: ACTOR DAVID WHITE DIES.
Larry Tate from TV's "Bewitched."
2004: POPE JOHN PAUL II RETURNS THE RELICS OF SAINT JOHN CHRYSOSTOM TO THE EASTERN ORTHODOX CHURCH.
Who knew he even had them??
2005: THE FIRST PARTIAL HUMAN FACE TRANSPLANT IS COMPLETED IN FRANCE.
So there is hope for the Phantom of the Opera after all.
2012: UNION LEADER MARVIN MILLER DIES.
Led the strikes of the players against Major League Baseball. For ruining my summer, you're getting what you deserve.
Dinner last night: Bratwurst burger.
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