Feel Good Story

You may have heard of the amazing story being authored by the Cardinals' Rick Ankiel. He used to be a pitcher in their organization. I remember him from one of the Met playoff games from 2000. He started one of the games against them and lasted 2/3 of an inning after walking three. Not only was he wild but most of his pitches wound up in the loge level. Home plate could have been twenty feet wide and this knucklehead still couldn't throw a strike. He was continually plagued by this bizarro psychological wildness that was very much akin to Chuck Knoblauch's inability to throw from second to first or Mackey Sasser's improbable inability to throw a runner out from the catching position. All the physical dexterity in the world means nothing if there's a mental disconnect. I am also reminded of the Pittsburgh Pirates' pitcher Steve Blass who could never get anybody out after his 1971 World Series success.

Getting back to the idiot in question, Ankiel became one of the Cardinals' great reclamation projects. After tooling around the minors for a while, they decided to turn him into an outfielder since he had been a better than average hitter as a pitcher. So, he makes his major league outfield debut a month ago. And he goes on this hitting tear. He did it against the Dodgers the first weekend and I was ready to call for an investigation. The media went gaga over this storybook ending. The guy who finally achieves baseball stardom after hitting the bottom of the barrel. Baseball's version of Nixon winning the Presidency after getting booted from his home state of California in 1962. I was waiting to hear who was going to play Ankiel in the inevitable movie of the week.

I've been skeptical since I know these suddenly-born hitters usually get outed out after they've gone around the league once. Pitchers figure him out and, before you know it, Ankiel will be swinging at pitches that he once threw.

Well, surprise. We won't even have to wait for that. It has come out that this moron is chemically enhanced. Another science project sponsored by the lax rulings of baseball's un-commissioner Bud Selig.

So long, idiot. It would have been a nice role for Matt Damon.

Dinner last night: BBQ Pork and rice at Panda Express.