Moe, Larry, and Wednesday

Woo woo woo. Stick this in your eye.

---So much for a "dwindling" economy. There were more idiots than ever in the airports on Monday traveling wherever.

---And they were not business travelers, because they generally wear shoes.

---There was one bunch of about 50 teenagers flying as a group and trying to push their life's belongings through Homeland Security.

---I was wondering if they have re-started "Up With People."

---If so, I will be joining "Down With Morons."

---If the economy is so freakin' bad, why are planes crowded?

---And why are the big screen TV departments in Best Buy so busy?

---Buy now, bitch later.

---And, once airlines start charging passengers to check baggage, I can't wait to see what gets shoved in the overhead compartments.

---"Hiya, Grandma, comfy up there?"

---As an American Airlines Platinum flyer, the surcharge ain't applying to me, thank you very much.

---Unlike Barack Obama, I am proud to admit that I am an elitist.

---A Surprisingly Tasty Luncheon in Business Class: the antipasto cold plate. Dee-lish.

---With my humblest apologies to those several rows behind chowing down on Pringles from a can.

---Speaking of which, the guy who invented Pringles Potato Chips died and his ashes have been interred in one of those cans.

---I got nothing.

---And a Surprisingly Great Read from Business Class while returning to Los Angeles: the oral history/biography of SNL's Chris Farley. When you boil it down, this poor guy had a career of only about 7 years. Truly sad.

---And to the idiot sitting next to me who kept reading over my shoulder, buy your own damn book!

---While this elitist was happily parked in the JFK Admiral's Club (which American offered to me this year at a much reduced rate), I watched the Crappy News Network report on the opening of a museum devoted to remembering Woodstock.

---A great way to recall the events of those days. A terrific way for those folks who went there to see what they can't remember.

---To make the museum truly authentic, they should flood it and pile in some mud.

---Just last month, a bunch of people who were conceived in a Volkswagen while Janis Joplin stumbled around on the stage just turned 39.

---While I was away from Los Angeles, there was a huge fire on the Universal Studios lot

---So, after all that, what good were any of those fire precautions you saw in the Backdraft exhibit?

---The King Kong attraction burned to a crisp and that finally ends the huge lie Universal has been propagating for years.

---The original King Kong movie was made not by Universal. It was done by RKO.

---What goes around comes around and I guess that includes flames.

---If Obama had only not run for President, he could still be going to the church he has frequented for 20 years.

---Now that he's a religious free agent, I'm wondering if Scott Boras is accepting offers yet.

---Hey, not only can Hillary keep her church, but she now has time to run the Halloween bake sale.

---And the summer ice cream social.

---And be the lector the first Sunday every month.

---For all the talk about the presumptive Democratic candidate, Obama is finishing up the primary season like the Mets wound up the 2007 baseball season.

---Speaking of the New York Metropolitans, my first game there last Saturday was an adventure. I have never seen more people walking around and not watching a ball game. It was like the Puerto Rican Day Parade started early.

---With the coming of Citi Field, the Mets finally removed the big traffic ring from the parking lot.

---Now the only thing in the vicinity still going around in circles is reliever Aaron Heilman, who can't even get a cigarette out.

---Or, even more mysteriously, he can't get a Dodger hitter out.

---In this, their 99th year since last winning the World Series, the Chicago Cubs are looking like world beaters.

---Rhetorical question: Will Cub October success bring on the apocalypse? Discuss.

---I think it's sort of akin to the crypts underneath the Vatican. When they run out of places to bury dead popes, the world ends.

And, for today, so do I.

Dinner last night: Grilled Bratwurst at the Dodger game.