708: COPPER COINS ARE MINTED IN JAPAN FOR THE FIRST TIME.
Can slot machines be far behind?
1498: VASCO DA GAMA DECIDES TO DEPART CALICUT AND RETURN TO PORTUGAL.
The name "Vasco" always sounded like a gas station to me.
1521: THE OTTOMAN TURKS CAPTURE NANDORFEHERVAR, NOW KNOWN AS BELGRADE.
I bet it took them only thirty seconds before they decided to change that name.
1526: THE OTTOMAN TURKS DEFEAT AND KILL THE KING OF HUNGARY AND BOHEMIA.
But those countries had names that were not hard to spell, so they retained them.
1541: THE OTTOMAN TURKS CAPTURE BUDA, THE CAPITAL OF HUNGARY.
Damn those Ottoman Turks. They're like the New York Yankees of the 50s.
1758: THE FIRST AMERICAN INDIAN RESERVATION IS ESTABLISHED AT INDIAN MILLS, NEW JERSEY.
And, for a second time...can slot machines be far behind?
1778: DURING THE AMERICAN REVOLUTION, BRITISH AND AMERICAN FOCRES BATTLE INDECISIVELY AT THE BATTLE OF RHODE ISLAND.
Just what the hell is an indecisive battle? Nobody killed anybody??
1786: SHAYS REBELLION, AN ARMED UPRISING OF MASSACHUSETTS FARMERS, BEGINS IN RESPONSE TO HIGH DEBT AND TAX BURDENS.
#OccupyVillageSquare.
1831: MICHAEL FARADAY DISCOVERS ELECTROMAGNETIC INDUCTION.
He got a charge out of that.
1833: THE UNITED KINGDOM LEGISLATES THE ABOLITION OF SLAVERY IN ITS EMPIRE.
As always, running ahead of the United States.
1835: THE CITY OF MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA, IS FOUNDED.
And can an Outback Steak House be far behind?
1842: THE TREATY OF NANKING SIGNING ENDS THE FIRST OPIUM WAR.
Buzzkill.
1885: GOTTLIEB DAIMLER PATENTS THE WORLD'S FIRST INTERNAL COMBUSTION MOTORCYCLE.
Who cares what gives them power? They're all nuisances on the road.
1898: THE GOODYEAR TIRE COMPANY IS FOUNDED.
When the rubber first met the road.
1898: FILM DIRECTOR PRESTON STURGES IS BORN.
One of the most underrated comedic film directors of all time. You want proof? See "Sullivan's Travels," "The Miracle of Morgan Creek," or "The Palm Beach Story."
1907: THE QUEBEC BRIDGE COLLAPSES DURING CONSTRUCTION, KILLING 75 WORKERS.
Talk about a bridge to nowhere.
1915: ACTRESS INGRID BERGMAN IS BORN.
Oooh, I've read ahead. Ingrid's one of those people who.....
1917: ACTRESS ISABEL SANFORD IS BORN.
Weezie!!
1922: FASHION CRITIC MR. BLACKWELL IS BORN.
Once met him a party and he died shortly thereafter. Must have been something I said.
1922: THE FIRST RADIO ANNOUNCEMENT IS BROADCAST ON WEAF-AM IN NEW YORK CITY.
Which means this is also the first time somebody changed a radio channel.
1926: ACTRESS BETTY LYNN IS BORN.
Thelma Lou from the Andy Griffith Show!!!
1935: DIRECTOR WILLIAM FRIEDKIN IS BORN.
The Power of Christ compels you!!
1936: POLITICIAN JOHN MCCAIN IS BORN.
Loser.
1938: ACTOR ELLIOTT GOULD IS BORN.
Once married to Streisand so I will go easy on him. He's suffered enough.
1940: WHITE HOUSE PRESS SECRETARY JAMES BRADY IS BORN.
He needed that job like a hole in the head.
1941: TV HOST ROBIN LEACH IS BORN.
Lifestyles of the Rich and Talentless.
1943: DURING WORLD WAR II, DENMARK SCUTTLES MOST OF ITS NAVY.
As opposed to waiting for Germany to destroy it.
1965: THE GEMINI V SPACECRAFT RETURNS TO EARTH.
Not really noteworthy news, unless they were secretly expecting it not to come back.
1966: THE BEATLES PERFORM THEIR LAST CONCERT BEFORE FANS AT CANDLESTICK PARK IN SAN FRANCISCO.
And you can bet those fans froze their collective asses off.
1977: ACTRESS JEAN HAGEN DIES.
Make Grave for Mommy.
1981: BROADCASTER LOWELL THOMAS DIES.
Making news he would never get to report.
1982: ACTRESS INGRID BERGMAN DIES.
....died on her birthday.
1985: ACTRESS EVELYN ANKERS DIES.
Who, you say? The female ingenue in the great Abbott and Costello film "Hold That Ghost," I say.
1987: ACTOR LEE MARVIN DIES.
M (as in mortality) Squad.
1996: VNUKOVO AIRLINES FLIGHT 2801 CRASHES INTO INTO THE ARCTIC ISLAND OF SPITSBERGEN, KILLING ALL 141 ABOARD.
Two points I will make. I will never visit Spitsbergen. And I certainly won;t fly there on Vnukovo Airlines.
2005: HURRICANE KATRINA DEVASTATES MUCH OF THE GOLF COAST.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. We heard. And I will still say that New Orleans is run by the dumbest politicians this side of the Atlantic Ocean. They knew those levees were faulty years ago and did nothing to repair them.
2016: ACTOR GENE WILDER DIES.
"Put the candle back."
Dinner last night: Hamburger.
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