One of my more confusing and yet pleasing haunts on sojourns to Dallas has been the Studio Movie Grill. I've been there twice already and it is the strangest concept yet. You eat your dinner in the theater while the movie is playing. I will illuminate.
Of course, this is a great way to combine two Saturday night excursions in one sitting. Also amazingly compact. If you go on a movie date and you just can't wait to ditch the other party, you no longer have to sit through a seemingly endless dinner after enduring some piece of dreck with Sandra Bullock. This way, your evening is over in half the time and you can go home to curse the person who set you up with whatever horror you picked up earlier that night.
You buy your tickets to whichever film and screen you want to see. The ticket seller hands you a menu and then you're off to your dining/viewing room. It's a regular theater except there are counters and fancy snack tables scattered about. A waiter comes by. You can eat before the film, which certainly makes those pre-show real estate ads and movie trivia quizes go by a lot quicker. Or you can make the mistake I did the first time I was there and order the rib basket sampler to show up 30 minutes into the flick. There is no messier experience than eating pork ribs in the dark. I am still seeing specks of barbecue sauce underneath my fingernails.
The other night, we had a pizza before the movie and this worked fine. But, repeating a previous sin, sundaes were ordered for dessert. And they showed up mid-film. I found so much chocolate sauce on my face that I must have looked like baby's first birthday party. Of course, we're not talking restaurant fare from Wolfgang Puck. Your choices here are burgers and sandwiches and pizza.
When the movie ended, I looked around the empty theater. A much tougher clean-up. Unlike popcorn kernels, ketchup poured over French fries is not easily swept up. And, from what I could see, if the patrons around me are as sloppy in their own homes as they are in these theaters, I need to start a carpet cleaning service based right outside Plano, Texas.
Dinner last night: Grilled ham back in LA.
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