Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Hot Tuesday, Chili Wednesday


I've been smoked out of California for a while. Hunkering down in NY for a bit, where the only real danger is presented by the old people already loading into Radio City for that stupid Christmas show.

---Flying out of LAX yesterday, the City of Angels looked like an ash tray at an Al-Anon meeting.

---Last weekend, the smoke was all over the place. I was outside and had a retro sense of smell.

---Mom?

---I haven't seen that much smoke in one place since my mother settled for a Bette Davis marathon on Channel 5.

---All the glue from those 600 mobile homes that melted created a stench that enveloped the city.

---And still Mayor Villaraigosa smells worse.

---My car on Sunday got covered with a fine layer of ash. Somebody left the skylight open at the local crematorium.

---I was driving around with either the remains of your living room sofa or your uncle.

---Of course, in LA, your home is either burning, shaking, or sliding down a hill.

---And there's no sympathy from me for those people who buy homes near wooden areas, faults, or on sticks that are stuck into a hillside.

---And when these knuckleheads rebuild, they will put their new homes near wooden areas, faults, or on sticks that are stuck into a hillside.

---From the word of mouth department: I know people who saw "Quantum of Solace" over the weekend and they all said it was dreadful.

---James Bond is dead. Thank you, Daniel Craig.

---By next weekend, the box office take will probably drop by 75%. Bond will now be marked down to 005.

---Jon Voight was on my flight east. He now joins the list of those celebrities I have seen more than five times. Like Richard Benjamin, Bob Newhart, and Teri Hatcher.

---Frankly, I wish I could see Teri Hatcher a lot more.

---New York is cold and the black gloves came out. So did all the bacteria and soot from the heating systems in most buildings. Just as black.

---That was not a racist comment.

---By the way, Obama picked a Black guy for Attorney General.

---Why do I think that all their White House kitchen help will be White?

---The Rockefeller Center Christmas tree is propped up and being decorated, so all is right with the world.

---The holiday movie playing this year at Radio City is "Father Goose" starring Cary Grant and Leslie Caron.

---Well, it was in 1964.

---Call me a hardass, but I don't really care about the Obama's search for a family dog.

---But I would care if I'm on the White House lawn during the next Easter Egg hunt.

---So, now the American car industry wants a bail out, too?

---There's one easy way to fix the US car makers. Make better cars!!

---A year ago, I rented a Dodge while my Toyota was being repaired. The sightlines were horrible, the seats were comfortable, and I wondered what had happened to the tuna fish which once occupied this can.

---And, in the Chevy Trail Blazer I have today in NY, the rear seats are so high that you can't see anything in the rear view mirror.

---Cheez, is the government also going to ante up for CC Sabathia, too?---Once President Barry looks at the federal ledgers, he's going to realize that he had more money to work with when he was running that NAACP cupcake sale.

---The most dangerous person in America right now is Nancy Pelosi. She's acting like some crazed housewife running around Kohl's with her husband's credit card.

---Will somebody give that lady some laundry to sort?

Time to chill out. And I'm in the right place to do it.

Dinner last night: Grilled chicken teriyaki and sesame noodles.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm surprised you didn't comment on Obama's thoughts on the NCAA Football Title....

Anonymous said...

I'm thinking of making some t-shirts to help celebrate the change and hope America's experiencing:

It's Official. We're Fucked!

Spare Change? Don't Ask Me. Ask Obama.

It's Oprah's Fault.

Pretend Nothing's Wrong.