Wednesday, May 13, 2009

The Way We Wednesday


"People. People who are Liberals. Are the luckiest people in the world."

---So, big nosed, big mouthed Barbra's personal assistant got pinched for driving with drugs and a loaded gun.

---If you worked for her, you'd also be driving with drugs and a loaded gun.

---And I'm thinking that Barbra's lunkhead of a husband, James Brolin, is sleeping with the aid of drugs. And a loaded gun under his pillow.

---She's an amazing talent.

---And an insane sociopath. There are websites devoted to people who have had the misfortune of dealing with her.

---Hotel workers who felt her wrath if they looked directly at her.

---People who have to walk backwards when they are leaving a meeting with her.

---Yeah, she's really normal.

---But, heck, when I had my moment with her at the US Open about 15 years ago, I bumped into her, said "hi," and she was, oh, so pleasant to me.

---If she only read this blog...

---Watching President Urkel (you heard me, Barbra) at that roast over the weekend, I began to wonder. Does he go anywhere without those windshield teleprompters???

---My God, even the cast of SNL adlibs once and a while.

---Can he put a complete sentence together without outside help.

---I wonder if this is uttered nightly when he and the First "Lady" go to bed?

---"Good, er, night, um, Michelle."

---Once again, this is one of the only public places you can go for an Obama joke these days.

---A leftover from my Citi Field visit: A Subway billboard in right field yaks up foot long sandwiches for five bucks.

---Except the Subway store in the park sells them for $6.95.

---For the second time in a year, somebody got happy with my debit card. Got a fraud alert about a 300 dollar expenditure at a CVS in West Covina.

---That's one smart bank computer. Knowing that there is no way in Hell I would ever be in West Covina.

---Of course, this necessitated a morning trip to WaMu/Chase for a new debit card. And multiple encounters with everybody over the age of 75 in Los Angeles.

---Seriously, at 9AM, cabs show up at banks to deposit some back numbers who feel the need to check on their money daily.

---And those that are under the age of 75 don't speak English.

---They should hang a sign. "Only English Spoken Here."

---Except the sign would have to be in Spanish.

---The way American Idol has shoved Adam Lambert down our throats, it would be hilarious if he got voted off tonight and missed the finals next week.

---Of course, the only way that would happen is if there was a cell phone outage last night in West Hollywood.

---And it won't happen because I finally figured out that the show is scripted. They want him in the finals for the red state/blue state battle. The hayseed from the Midwest vs. the gay guy with the black fingernail polish from the big city.

---I'm done with Idol. And I'm done for today.

Dinner last night: Grilled chicken cutlet and salad.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Question: what costs $300 at CVS?