Your Weekend Movie Guide for January 2024

 

Well, something had to open the Radio City Music Hall in 1933.  It might as well have been Mr. Ape himself.   I wonder how many Rockettes got stepped on.

So what is destroying our theaters in January 2024?   I am guessing plenty.  You know the monthly drill, guys.  I'll give you my gut reaction to what's playing at the movie houses via Fandango.   Instead of bananas, you might want to bring some rotten eggs.  To throw at the screen.

Mean Girls:  A remake of junk filmed in 2004.  Isn't that a little quick?

Wonka:  At least the original was shot in the 60s.

The Beekeeper:  Don't get stung.

Killers of the Flower Moon:  Blog review coming.  I'm still waiting for the movie to end.

Anyone But You:   The way Democrats view Trump.

The Book of Clarence:   The Bible except with Black people.  Turning water into Ripple.

Oppenheimer:  Reviewed here recently.   The Oscar front runner.   Not on my ballot.

The Boys in the Boat:   Reviewed here recently.  The best picture of 2023 and getting no Oscar buzz.  Inexplicable.

The Color Purple:   Apparently there are people who think they can improve on Steven Spielberg's work.

The Iron Claw:  Not craw, it's claw!   Get Smart circa 1967.

Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom:  All wet.

Night Swim:  A killer pool.  I guess they used too much chlorine.

Migration:  Animation.  Unlike the cartoon going on at the southern border.

American Fiction:   White people are bad...the next installment.

Poor Things:  Reviewed here recently.  Perhaps the worst movie I have ever seen.

The Boy and the Heron:   To be followed by "Heron, Come Home."

Double Down South:  Keno-pool gambling, whatever the fuck that is.

Cult Killer:  About a cult killer?

Founder's Day:  A slash fest in a small town.   Yeah, that's been done before.

The Hunted:  Refugees capsize and rich Europeans take them in on an idyllic island.  Sounds like Sanctuary Island.

Wanted Man:  Starring Dolph Lundren and Kelsey Grammer?????!!!

Which Brings Me to You:  Without even looking, I can tell you this is a dreary romcom.

Ferrari:   The car designer.   Post-battle with Ford?

All of Us Strangers:   A gay ghost story.   I always wondered about Casper.

Zone of Interest:  The commandant of Auschwitz moves his family next door to the camp.  Kids, don't worry about that smell.

Dinner last night:  Grilled beef sausage.