Wednesday, February 16, 2011

This Day in History - February 16

"Ward, I'm worried about the Lenster."

1249:  ANDREW OF LONGJUMEAU IS DISPATCHED BY LOUIS IX OF FRANCE AS HIS AMBASSADOR TO MEET WITH MONGOL KHAGAN OF THE MONGOL EMPIRE.

If it was successful, is Andrew available to go to Cairo?

1804:  DURING THE FIRST BARBARY WAR, STEPHEN DECATUR LEADS A RAID TO BURN THE PIRATE-HELD FRIGATE USS PHILADELPHIA.

And, later on, he got his own street in the Bronx.  If that's an obscure joke for you, I wrote it exclusively for one of my readers.  If you want your own customized gag here, please drop a line and I will be happy to comply.

1852:  STUDEBAKER BROTHERS WAGON COMPANY, PRECURSOR OF THE AUTOMOBILE MANUFACTURER, IS ESTABLISHED.

Little did they know how many kids would be conceived in the back of one.

1859:  THE FRENCH GOVERNMENT PASSES A LAW TO SET THE A-NOTE ABOVE MIDDLE C TO A FREQUENCY OF 435 HZ IN AN ATTEMPT TO STANDARDIZE THE PITCH.

Now there's a country with absolutely nothing to do.

1868:  IN NEW YORK CITY, THE JOLLY CORKS ORGANIZATION IS RENAMED THE BENEVOLENT AND PROTECTIVE ORDER OF ELKS.

Now there's a club with absolutely nothing to do.

1899: KNATTSPYRNUFELAG REYKJAVIKUR ICELAND'S FIRST FOOTBALL CLUB IS FOUNDED.

And so apparently is the first eye chart.

1903:  VENTRILOQUIST EDGAR BERGEN IS BORN.

He made a lot of money off Charlie McCarthy, so who's the dummy now?

1909:  ACTOR HUGH BEAUMONT IS BORN.

Just what was he doing with the Beaver in that den?

1918:  SINGER PATTY ANDREWS IS BORN.

The one Andrews Sister still alive.  My grandmother used to call them "three ugly Guineas."  Except they were Greek.  Grandma missed one every once in a while.

1923:  HOWARD CARTER UNSEALS THE BURIAL CHAMBER OF PHARAOH TUTANKHAMUN.

That's got to be a quick way to stir up some dust allergies.

1921:  ACTRESS/DANCER VERA-ELLEN IS BORN.

A terrific talent who died too young.  She and Rosemary Clooney stole the movie "White Christmas" right out from under Bing Crosby and Danny Kaye.

1928:  ENTERTAINER EDDIE FOY DIES.

Now it's the six little Foys.

1935:  SINGER SONNY BONO IS BORN.

This gag pays off in just a little bit.

1936:  AMERICAN SKIER JILL KINMONT IS BORN.

So, on successive February 16s, we have the birth of one really lousy skier and one really good one.

1937:  WALLACE H. CAROTHERS RECEIVES A UNITED STATES PATENT FOR NYLON.

And I bet he liked to wear them, too.

1945:  DURING WORLD WAR II, AMERICAN FORCES LAND ON CORREGIDOR ISLAND IN THE PHILIPPINES.

The beginning of the end for those Nip bastards.  Can I say that?

1967:  HOCKEY PLAYER KEITH GRETZKY IS BORN.

Talking about having your thunder stolen.

1968:  IN HALEYVILLE, ALABAMA, THE FIRST 9-1-1 EMERGENCY TELEPHONE SYSTEM GOES INTO SERVICE.

In Alabama, nobody can remember what you dial to reach 9-1-1.

1985:  HEZBOLLAH IS FOUNDED.

And our world hasn't been the same since.

2001:  SEX DOCTOR WILLIAM MASTERS DIES.

Talk about a cool profession.

2005:  THE NATIONAL HOCKEY LEAGUE CANCELS THE ENTIRE 2004-2005 REGULAR SEASON AND PLAYOFFS, BECOMING THE FIRST MAJOR SPORTS LEAGUE TO DO SO OVER A LABOR DISPUTE.

Inconveniencing thousands of fans in Canada.  And two dozen in the United States.

2006:  THE LAST MOBILE ARMY SURGICAL HOSPITAL (M*A*S*H*) IS DECOMMISSIONED BY THE US ARMY.

The series ran eight years longer than the Korean War it was set in.

Dinner last night:  Salami sandwich and salad.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Decatur Avenue? Is that an obscure reference?