Friday, March 16, 2018

Your Weekend Movie Guide for March 2018

Ah, this classic movie ad from likely Spring 1959 has so much fun info.   First of all, this film is now playing at the theater where I grew up...RKO Proctor's in Mount Vernon, New York.   Of course, the other thing that catches my eye is the double feature.   How strange a combination with the light hearted fare of "Auntie Mame."   But that was back in the day when movies were a true adventure and you got to see a little of everything.

Of course, "Revolt in the Big House" is probably ten times better than anything playing in the multiplexes this weekend.  You know the drill, guys.   I'll sift through the LA Times and give you my knee-jerk reaction to what's polluting our theaters this week.

I am sure you could find both of the above playing on TCM if you so choose.  Might be the better option.

Black Panther:  Reviewed here recently.  A super hero movie that is elevated to ungodly levels of supposed greatness by a film industry that is petrified of being called racist.

A Wrinkle in Time:   Just the advance photos of Oprah in glitter were enough to scare me off.

The Shape of Water:   Reviewed here regrettably.   Lingering now because it won the Best Picture Oscar...just might be the worst film to ever get that honor.

Game Night:  Jason Bateman in a yarn where some party games go bad. They should have stuck to Twister.

Death Wish:   Bruce Willis in the old Charles Bronson reboot of a vigilante.   I can't wait to see how they make this one politically correct.

Gringo:  Likely not to be in Trump's DVR queue.

Annihilation:   Pretty much what's happening to this country.

Peter Rabbit:   Out at Easter time.   Some marketing people are geniuses.

Red Sparrow:   Jennifer Lawrence shoots 'em up again.  She's starting to suffer from Morgan Freeman-itis....a disease which finds you making a movie a week.

Thoroughbreds:  Evil teenage girls.   Yeah, tell me about it.

The Leisure Seeker:  It stars Donald Sutherland and Helen Mirren so I am guessing it's about old people.

Foxtrot:   An Israeli couple mourn the death of their son in the line of duty.   So where does the dancing come in?

The Death of Stalin:   Russian government runs amuck in this dark comedy. The trailer looks good.

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri:   See it for the performances alone.  They all deserved the Oscars they got.

Dear Dictator:   No, this isn't a movie about a Donald Trump fan club. Michael Caine stars...another one afflicted by Morgan Freeman-itis.

Demon House:   Looking for new pledges..... bwwhhaaa.

Love, Simon:   A gay teen rom com.   Think "Pretty in Pink" with all guys.

7 Days in Entebbe:   Are they still dredging up this story???

Tomb Raider:   Another Lara Croft adventure...whoever the fuck she is.

Journey's End:   British soldiers at the end of World War I and strictly for those with an essay due.

Allure:  A troubled young woman hooks up with a teenage pianist, who is probably not Liberace.

Apartment 212:   A young woman moves to New York and starts finding small wounds on her body.   That IRT subway can be a real killer.

Benji:   A reboot of the 1974 dog movie and I assume it's a different canine. Unless the first one is now 342 years old.

Flower:   Another angry teen lashes out and I see a pattern forming.

Furlough:   All about a young female prison guard.   And they say actresses can't find work these days?

The Happys:   Young couple angst in Los Feliz.  Isn't there always?

Itzhak:   A documentary about the violinist and there better be reclining seats in that theater.

Josie:   A mysterious young woman...oh, for God's sake...enough!

Ramen Heads:   A documentary about...what do you think?

Dinner last night:  Chef's salad.

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