1060: BELA I IS CROWNED KING OF HUNGARY.
Where number was Lugosi?
1648: COLONEL THOMAS PRIDE OF THE NEW MODEL ARMY PURGES THE LONG PARLIAMENT OF MPs SYMPATHETIC TO KING CHARLES I OF ENGLAND, IN ORDER FOR THE KING'S TRIAL TO GO AHEAD, CAME TO BE KNOWN AS "PRIDE'S PURGE."
Pride's Purge sounds like the name of one of those supermarket brands of canned peas.
1768: THE FIRST EDITION OF THE ENCYCLOPAEDIA BRITANNICA IS PUBLISHED.
Look that up.
1790: THE US CONGRESS MOVES FROM NEW YORK CITY TO PHILADELPHIA.
Back when you actually paid attention to Congress.
1865: THE 13TH AMENDMENT TO THE US CONSTITUTION IS RATIFIED, BANNING SLAVERY.
There are some in 2023 who think this never happened.
1877: THE FIRST EDITION OF THE WASHINGTON POST IS PUBLISHED.
Now known as the Washington Compost.
1884: THE WASHINGTON MONUMENT IS COMPLETED.
An erection that did not need Viagra.
1886: POET JOYCE KILMER IS BORN.
Plant this.
1889: CONFEDERATE PRESIDENT JEFFERSON DAVIS DIES.
I assume there are no statues left, right?
1897: LONDON BECOMES THE WORLD'S FIRST CITY TO HOST LICENSED TAXICABS.
Too easy to make an Uber joke?
1900: ACTRESS AGNES MOOREHEAD IS BORN.
Endora on "Bewitched."
1904: THEODORE ROOSEVELT ARTICULATED HIS COROLLARY TO THE MONROE DOCTRINE, STATING THAT THE US WOULD INTERVENE IN THE WESTERN HEMISPHERE SHOULD LATIN AMERICAN GOVERNMENTS PROVE INCAPABLE OR UNSTABLE.
Regretting this now.
1917: FINLAND DECLARES INDEPENDENCE FROM RUSSIA.
Fin-ally.
1917: HALIFAX EXPLOSION - A MUNITIONS EXPLOSION NEAR HALIFAX, NOVA SCOTIA KILLS MORE THAN 1,900 PEOPLE IN THE LARGEST ARTIFICIAL EXPLOSION UP TO THAT TIME.
Hardly artificial to me.
1924: ACTOR WALLY COX IS BORN.
The Hollywood Square on the top left.
1933: US FEDERAL JUDGE JOHN WOOLSEY RULES THAT JAMES JOYCE'S NOVEL "ULYSSES" IS NOT OBSCENE.
I'll bet he never read between pages 20-30 of "The Godfather."
1941: MURDERER RICHARD SPECK IS BORN.
Insert your favorite eight student nurses joke here.
1947: THE EVERGLADES NATIONAL PARK IN FLORIDA IS DEDICATED.
After the last hurricane, half of Miami looked like a swamp.
1948: ACTRESS JOBETH WILLIAMS IS BORN.
And still kicking herself for turning down "Murphy Brown."
1953: VLADIMIR NABOKOV COMPLETES HIS CONTROVERSIAL NOVEL "LOLITA."
Sweet sixteen...and then some.
1956: A VIOLENT WATER POLO MATCH BETWEEN HUNGARY AND THE USSR TAKES PLACE DURING THE 1956 SUMMER OLYMPICS IN MELBOURNE.
How violent can water polo get?
1967: ADRIAN KANTROWITZ PERFORMS THE FIRST HUMAN HEART TRANSPLANT IN THE US.
I don't see the letters "MD." WTF!!
1973: THE US HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES CONFIRMS GERALD FORD AS VICE PRESIDENT OF THE US.
Don't get comfortable. You'll be changing addresses again soon.
1977: SOUTH AFRICA GRANTS INDEPENDENCE TO BOPHUTHATSWANA, ALTHOUGH IT IS NOT RECOGNIZED BY ANY OTHER COUNTRY.
Probably because nobody else could pronounce it.
1985: PUPPETEER BURR TILLSTROM DIES.
Kukla, Fran, and Dead.
1989: ACTRESS FRANCES BAVIER DIES.
Aunt Bee was found dead at home with 14 cats. I'm gagging as I write this.
1989: ACTOR JOHN PAYNE DIES.
I wonder how many times he got confused with John Wayne.
1993: ACTOR DON AMECHE DIES.
He won the Oscar for "Cocoon" and then died a few years later. So there.
1996: NFL COMMISSIONER PETE ROZELLE DIES.
Aw, he missed the January 1997 Super Bowl.
2000: ACTOR WERNER KLEMPERER DIES.
Hogan!!!
2006: NASA REVEALS PHOTOGRAPHS SUGGESTING THE PRESENCE OF LIQUID WATER ON MARS.
Well, Martians need to hydrate, too.
Dinner last night: Salad.
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