Even I Can Be Sold on Something...

In over one year plus of blog posts here on this site, I guess you can say there are two themes that pretty much resound on a daily basis.

Cynicism.

And, since I probably need to select a minor as well...

Skepticism.

Yep, as far as I am concerned, nothing works. Nothing is what it is said to be. Everything is doomed to break down at some point. Everyone has an agenda. Nobody tells the truth. People are stupid. Folks are rude. And most Americans are such pinheads that they will buy into just anything they hear.

So, imagine my horror when I briefly joined the official roster of the Lemmings. And tried one of those miracle products you see on late night television. Up to now, as a regular watcher of the American Life network where TV spots generally sell for about 6 dollars a pop, I have been able to resist the urge to purchase a gas-powered wheelchair. Or one of those straps that would allow me and a friend to go around Los Angeles picking up pianos at will. And, since I don't have a dog, there is no need for me to hook myself up with some of that canine arthritis medicine that will very quickly enable my pooch to hop back on the couch and pee on one of the cushions.

But, then, I saw the ads for Kinoki Foot Pads.

Okay, these are some Japanese herbal pouches that you tape to the bottom of your feet overnight and they supposedly help you to detoxify your body while you sleep. Yeah, right. And, in the process, you have fewer headaches, less pain in your joints, and more of a spring in your step.

Hmmm. I doubt it.

But, then, I'm talking to a friend at work who tried the damn things. And she wound up with a lot less sinus headaches in the morning.

Hmmm. Okay, maybe.

And another friend also mentions some knee pain subsiding as a result.

I wind up on the Kinoki website and order a starter kit for about 15 bucks.

Okay, so the whole thing is tied to reflexology and the notion that most of your body channels into the bottom of you feet. I know there is some validity in this from a former neighbor of my mother who got into this in a big way and ended up with a side career as a foot massager. And these detox foot pads are supposed to work the same way. Positive ions go in. Negative ions go out. And all the metal waste inside of you is allegedly extracted. Just when did I eat that aluminum soda can?

You take this little packets and tape them to the bottom of your feet before you go to bed. They actually are very comfortable to walk on and I am wondering if Dr. Scholl's has taken note. Overnight, the white color of the pads next to your skin are supposed to turn a brown or gray shade as the "poisons" ooze out of your body.

Of course, after the first night, I was dying to look. And, sure enough, the official color of my body's toxins is a dark brown. But, I'm still a little jaded. I figure the sweat of your feet effects the color change.

Except, on subsequent mornings, the color fades more and more. I guess all that nasty copper I've ingested over time has started to decrease. And I also notice something else. After about a week with this Mr. Wizard science project wrapped to my feet, I realize that I have not awakened with a sinus headache for the entire seven days. Usually, I am good for at least two a week. And what about the arthritic toe that usually bothers me a couple of times a day? Pain free. Knee mobility? Greatly improved.

WTF.

I'd be the last person to think this shit actually worked. And I have no clue why I'm having the results I am. But, at the same time...

I just re-ordered.

Dinner last night: Mesquite Chicken Salad at Chili's.