From the title, you're probably thinking today's entry is all about the Olympics. Actually, I sold sponsorship of this blog to the flour.
---China is right behind the US in medal count. Which means that most of the Chinese athletes won't be shot when the games end.
---I watch these little 10 year-old Chinese girls bouncing around on the gym mats and I wonder how many of them will have crippling arthritis by the time they're 25.
---Working, of course, under the assumption that most of them live to the age of 25.
---By the way, as NBC loves to keep reminding me, it's "Bay-zhing."
---Who the hell cares what they call it? All the action is on tape and it happened almost a day ago.
---I checked out as soon as Michael Phelps got Medal Number 8. Sorry, but I have no rooting interest when it comes to Women's Volleyball.
---They called that big stadium there "The Bird's Nest" and I wonder if that's where they make the soup.
---Ellen DeGeneres got married to longtime whatever Portia DeRossi over the weekend and I'd like to know which one of them is registered at the Home Depot.
---A work associate is getting married this weekend and he mentioned that the California marriage license now says "Applicant A" and "Applicant B."
---Now, ff there was an "Applicant C," that would be a pretty damn interesting wedding to attend.
---Somebody out here thought they spotted Bigfoot, but it was simply Dodger outfielder Andruw Jones on his way to his Las Vegas minor league rehab.
---Good news for Ed McMahon fans. Donald Trump bailed him out of his money woes.
---Now we won't have to worry about Ed skimming off the top of those 7/11 donation cans at the Jerry Lewis Telethon.
---I am accepting guesses right now. Just how many chins will Jerry have this year?
---I heard they're announcing the new Dancing with the Stars contestants next week. Which explains to me why I've seen a lot of D list celebrities scurrying around LA lately.
---Hmm, let's see. They've had somebody with one leg and somebody who was deaf. Who's next?
---Ladies and gentlemen, dancing the quick step....Mr. Stevie Wonder.
---No, no, you're a little too close to the edge, Stevie.
---Heck, I'd watch this shit every week if he was on there. Especially if they put the guide dog in one of those slinky gowns.
---Who's that tub of lard minister who was interviewing McCain and Obama last weekend?
---Religious leaders need to stay the hell out of politics. Last I heard, Jesus was registered as an Independent.
---During that forum, Obama told us all that his most trusted advisor would be his wife.
---And I heard that, with all the trouble in Georgia, she wanted to send troops to Savannah.
---Rhetorical question: will Obama pick both Oprah and Gayle King to be on his Cabinet?
---Or, as they would be more commonly known in California...."Applicant A" and "Applicant B."
---After all these years, I still think Condoleeza Rice is served as a side with chicken fajitas.
---Why is it that, whenever you see McCain out campaigning, he's sitting in some coffee shop or a diner?
---And I am guessing it's always before 4PM, so he can get the early bird special.
---Why don't we simply install both McCain and Obama as co-Presidents and then watch the fur fly? I could get into that kind of street brawl.
---With all the explosions overseas, I was convinced that the Met bullpen was on a USO tour.
---Quoting my dad: The Met bullpen is like the Mount Vernon Fire Department. "They can't put out a cigarette."
---One more hurricane beared down on Florida. I was talking to a friend there and he said people were crowding stores and hording water.
---I would think that water is the last thing they will need.
---At the same time, I can't scold people who live in Florida while I'm out in California sitting on top of a ten mile wide crevice that could give out any minute.
Actually, I'm giving out right now.
Dinner last night: Lasagna.
7 comments:
Holy Moley Mr. Len Speaks, you may have just saved America from the nightmare that will be the November election results! The candidate of the party receiving the most votes becomes the President and the candidate of the party receiving the second highest amount of votes becomes the Vice President. We return to voting by platform rather than candidate, since we'd wind up with both candidates in office. It creates a more balanced result because cabinet appointments and decisions over funding, etc. become a result of working together. Neither President or VP can spin endless words, they'd have to find a way to work together to solve issues and produce results. Politics (and personality contests) are forced to the side as government returns to the business of governing. Looks like the bicoastal writer has more to his blog than a few Your Momma jokes!
Just one more example that this blog can run the gamut. From the sublime to the ridiculous.
Yo mama's so smart that...
BTW: Much of the Olympic stuff is actually live. It's actually given me something to do as I sit here after foot surgery. It's amazing how much you take things like being able to go to the bathroom without a walker for granted.
As for the co-presidents: Obama is a menace to this country. His concept of "change" is allowing him to run the country into the ground.
Mr. Puck----
Hope you're back and mobile soon.
As for your Obama reference, you are a rare bird today. Because if anybody these days so much as challenges the notion that he is not exactly the right guy for this job, you are labelled as an idiot or a racist. Obviously, as you can tell, I'm pretty distrustful of most politicians. I particularly think that he is not what he purports himself to be. But, then again, who is?
It's refreshing to see somebody actually come out and say what they think regardless of whether or not it runs against the conventional tide. Good for you.
As for the Olympics, it may be live for you, but not live for the West Coast. I always knew Phelps had won almost a half day before it aired on NBC in LA.
Puck - Sorry about the foot surgery - what a bummer....
Speaking of D list celebs, I spied Danny Bonaduce cruising Sunset in his red convertible. Ravaged is a good word to describe this former child star/current train wreck. Can't somebody get him a gig?
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