Last Wednesday for Your TV Antenna

You don't need any hi-tech equipment to read this blog. Just an open...and twisted mind.

---Finally! TV goes digital this weekend and we can finally stop getting these reminders.

---Of course, by Monday, there will be a host of senior citizens across the country who will be wondering where Matlock went.

---If my grandmother was still alive, her TV would not be working on June 13. She never even made the jump to color television.

---She came from the day when it wasn't even called a TV antenna. It was an "aerial."

---Of course, I'm also waiting for the inevitable cries that digital TV discriminates.

---"Shit...what happened to my Good Times reruns?!!!"

---If you're not over 75 and you don't have TV next week, it might be because you're incredibly stupid.

---Speaking of Hi-Def TV, the worst thing to watch on these sets is the NBA Playoffs. Because you are forced to look close-up at all those ugly tattoos those jerks have.

---I love the fact that these tatts all have elaborate messages. Kind of funny when you realize most of the players can barely read.

---If you're having trouble sleeping, may I suggest the Stanley Cup Finals?

---That's hockey. Surely, you've heard of the sport.

---Hockey. H-O-C-K-E-Y.

---Right, the game on the ice.

---The sport that has about 75 fans in this country.

---Forget about it.

---Adam Lambert has revealed that he is gay.

---And, in another surprise announcement, scientists have determined that water is wet.

---New ratings have come out and Katie Couric's Evening News has dropped to the lowest audience levels ever.

---It's a matter of time before there are more people reading this blog than listening to her.

---And we have even discussed colonoscopies here. Take that, Katie!

---And my target audience here is a better mix of demographics. Unlike the Evening News, where most of the ads are for leaky bladders and spastic colons.

---When a person has part of their colon removed, is it then called a semi-colon? Just a thought.

---In my church's coffee hour, the discussion went to the POTUS and FLOTUS' big Saturday night date in NY. There was only one person in the room who had no problem with the tax dollars spend for that evening.

---Yep, the person was Black.

---Yeah, there is no reverse bias in America.

---I'm going to conduct a meeting in my office of all those Blacks who did not vote for Urkel.

---I only have four chairs and that should be more than enough.

---There's a new helicopter traffic pilot on Channel 2 in LA. Amelia Earhart.

---Okay, like I'm supposed to believe that is her real name.

---Like the weather guy on Channel 7. Dallas Raines.

---Maybe I change the name of this blog.

---Dickens Speaks.

---Supreme Court Justice nominee Sotomayor tripped at LaGuardia and fractured her ankle.

---Just so she knows, that's probably happened to some white men as well.

---And just when you think you've heard them all, somebody sends me some new Helen Keller jokes. But I'll adapt them so we can skewer that numbskull Governor of New York, David Paterson.

---Why were Governor Paterson's socks yellow?

---His dog was blind, too.

---What did Governor Paterson do when he fell in the well?

---He screamed his fingers off.

---Why was Governor Paterson such a bad driver?

---She was a woman. Okay, not all of them are adaptable. But, you SEE the point.

LOOK for me tomorrow.

Dinner last night: Penne with sausage and Kalamata olives.