571 BC: SERVIUS TULLIUS, KING OF ROME, CELEBRATES HIS VICOTRY OVER THE ETRUSCANS.
With, I am guessing, lots of vino.
1120: THE WHITE SHIP SINKS IN THE ENGLISH CHANNEL.
White Ships Matter.
1343: A TSUNAMI DEVASTATES NAPLES AND AMALFI.
And here we go.
1487: ELIZABETH OF YORK IS CROWNED QUEEN OF ENGLAND.
Love her peppermint patties.
1667: A DEADLY EARTHQUAKE ROCKS SHEMAKHA, KILLING 80,000 PEOPLE.
Hard to believe there were 80,000 people in a country I never heard of.
1783: AMERICAN REVOLUTION - THE LAST BRITISH TROOPS LEAVE NEW YORK CITY.
Can you blame them for sticking around?
1826: THE GREEK FRIGATE HELLAS ARRIVES TO BECOME THE FIRST FLAGSHIP OF THE HELLENIC NAVY.
Go to Hellas.
1833: A MASSIVE EARTHQUAKE ROCKS SUMATRA.
Now we're cooking.
1839: A CYCLONE SLAMS INDIA, CLAIMING 300,000 LIVES.
Time to move.
1864: AMERICAN CIVIL WAR - A GROUP OF CONFEDERATE OPERATIVES TRY TO BURN DOWN NEW YORK CITY.
How the heck did they get past New Jersey?
1874: THE US GREENBACK PARTY IS ESTABLISHED, CONSISTING PRIMARILY OF FARMERS.
A third party never works.
1914: BASEBALL STAR JOE DIMAGGIO IS BORN.
Starting his consecutive day streak which ends in 1999.
1918: VOJVODINA PROCLAIMS ITS SECESSION FROM AUSTR-AHUNGARY TO JOIN THE KINGDOM OF SERBIA.
Is there such a thing as a Volvodinian?
1920: RACE CAR DRIVER GASTON CHEVROLET DIES.
See the USA...in a casket.
1926: TWENTY SEVEN TORNADOS BREAK OUT ACROSS THE US ON THANKSGIVING DAY.
Good luck getting that Bullwinkle balloon up in the air.
1933: ACTRESS KATHRYN CROSBY IS BORN.
Meanwhile, future hubby Bing's career is already in full swing.
1947: RED SCARE - THE HOLLYWOOD TEN ARE BLACKLISTED BY MOVIE STUDIOS.
Commie pinkos. A sad day for freedom.
1949: DANCER BILL ROBINSON DIES.
Shirley Temple is heartbroken.
1950: THE GREAT STORMS OF NOVEMBER 1950 DEVASTATE THE NORTHEAST.
Just in case you're wondering why Grandma didn't make it over for turkey.
1952: AGATHA CHRISTIE'S "THE MOUSETRAP" PLAY OPENS IN LONDON. IT WILL BECOME THE LONGEST RUNNING PLAY IN HISTORY.
Good seats now available at TKTS.
1960: JOHN F. KENNEDY JR IS BORN.
Future journalist, lawyer, publisher, and lousy pilot. Also will have a shitty birthday in 1963.
1974: BURMESE DIPLOMAT U THANT DIES.
If Ella Fitzgerald had married U Thant, she'd be Ella...
1981: POPE JOHN PAUL II APPOINTS JOSEPH CARDINAL RATZINGER PREFECT OF THE CONGREGATION FOR THE DOCTRINE OF THE FAITH.\
The future Pope who quit.
1981: ACTOR JACK ALBERTSON DIES.
Chico's man.
1984: THIRTY-SIX MUSICIANS RECORD BAND AID'S "DO THEY KNOW IT'S CHRISTMAS."
The song was a great listen the first thousand times. Not so much after.
1986: IRAN-CONTRA - US ATTORNEY GENERAL EDWIN MEESE ANNOUNCES THAT PROFITS FROM COVERT WEAPON SALES TO IRAN WERE ILLEGALLY DIVERTED TO CONTRA REBELS IN NICARAGUA.
What guns?
1987: TYPHOON NINA DESTROYS THE PHILLIPINES.
More doppler weather.
1996: AN ICE STORY STRIKES THE CENTRAL US.
Global cooling.
1998: COMIC FLIP WILSON DIES.
Sadly, he took Geraldine with him.
2000: THE EARTH QUAKE OF BAKU.
Wherever the hell that is.
2008: CYCLONE NISHA STRIKES SRI LANKA.
And the hits just keep coming.
2009: FREAK RAINS SWAMP THE CITY OF JEDDAH, SAUDI ARABIA.
I don't know about you, but I'm hiding under my bed today.
Dinner last night: Sandwich.
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