30 BC: AFTER THE SUCCESSFUL INVASION OF EGYPT, OCTAVIAN EXECUTES MARCUS ANTONIUS ANTYLLIS, ELDEST SON OF MARK ANTONY, AND CAESARION, THE ONLY SON OF JULIUS CAESAR AND CLEOPATRA.
Caesar and Liz Taylor had a kid? That wasn't in the movie.
79 AD: MOUNT VESUVIUS BEGINS STIRRING.
Lava to come.
634: ABU BAKR DIES AT MEDIAN AND IS SUCCEEDED BY UMAR I.
Show of hands for all who care. I see none.
1244: SIEGE OF JERUSALEM - THE CITY'S CITADEL, THE TOWER OF DAVID, SURRENDERS TO KHWAREZMIAN EMPIRE.
Yes, I typed that.
1382: SIEGE OF MOSCOW - THE GOLDEN HORDE LED BY TOKHTAMYSH LAYS SIEGE T THE CAPITAL OF THE GRAND DUCHY OF MOSCOW.
Typed that, too.
1541: FRENCH EXPLORE JACQUES CARTIER LANDS NEAR QUEBEC CITY.
Jewelry store to come.
1572: FRENCH WARS OF RELIGION - MOB VIOLENCE AGAINST THOUSANDS OF HUGUENOTS IN PARIS RESULTS IN THE ST. BARTHOLOMEW'S DAY MASSACRE.
Do we get that day off?
1650: COLONEL GEORGE MONCK OF THE ENGLISH ARMY FORMS MONCK'S REGIMENT OF FOOT.
I give him the finger.
1775: AMERICAN REVOLUTION - KING GEORGE III DELIVERS HIS PROCLAMATION OF REBELLION TO THE COURT OF ST. JAMES, STATING THAT THE AMERICAN COLONIES HAVE PROCEEDED TO A STATE OF OPEN AND DISAVOWED REBELLION.
Don't sweat it. In over 225 years or so, you'll be happy to be rid of this dump of a nation.
1799: NAPOLEON I OF FRANCES LEAVES EGYPT FOR FRANCE EN ROUTE TO SEIZING POWER.
Shrimp!
1831: NAT TURNER'S SLAVE REBELLION IS SUPPRESSED.
They'll be back. Trust me.
1901: SIX HUNDRED AMERICAN SCHOOL TEACHERS, THOMASITES, ARRIVED IN MANILA ON THE USAT THOMAS.
USAT? I wonder if that's where they got the idea for the pre-college exam.
1904: THE AUTOMOBILE TIRE CHAIN IS PATENTED.
Where's that snowy hill?
1912: ACTOR GENE KELLY IS BORN.
Another national holiday.
1926: ACTOR RUDOLPH VALENTINO DIES.
And women faint all over town.
1927: ITALIAN ANARCHISTS SACCO AND VANZETTI ARE EXECUTED AFTER A CONTROVERSIAL TRIAL.
Ciao!
1931: ACTRESS BARBARA EDEN IS BORN.
This makes her 86 and probably hard to get into that outfit now.
1948: WORLD COUNCIL OF CHURCHES IS FORMED.
Here comes the collection plate.
1949: ACTRESS SHELLEY LONG IS BORN.
Cheers!
1949: ACTOR RICK SPRINGFIELD IS BORN.
Wow, he's much older than I thought.
1970: ORGANIZED BY MEXICAN AMERICAN LABOR UNION LEADER CESAR CHAVEZ, THE SALAD BOWL STRIKE, THE LARGEST FARM WORKER STRIKE IN US HISTORY, BEGINS.
Go find your own romaine.
1978: BASKETBALL STAR KOBE BRYANT IS BORN.
He saved the Laker franchise for a few years.
1987: THE AMERICAN MALE BASKETBALL TEAM LOST THE GOLD MEDAL TO BRAZIL AT THE PAN AMERICAN GAMES IN INDIANAPOLIS, 120-115.
Who cares????
1990: MUSICIAN DAVID ROSE DIES.
Take it off. Take it all off.
1990: SADDAM HUSSEIN APPEARS ON IRAQI TELEVISION WITH A NUMBER OF WESTERN GUESTS, ACTUALLY HOSTAGES.
I'd watch this over the View any day.
1990: WEST AND EAST GERMANY ANNOUNCE THAT THEY WILL REUNITE ON OCTOBER 3.
Just in time for the baseball playoffs.
1991: THE WORLD WIDE WEB IS OPENED TO THE PUBLIC.
For the last time.....this didn't involve Al Gore.
2002: BASEBALL PITCHER HOYT WILHELM DIES.
Strike three.
2003: BASEBALL STAR BOBBY BONDS DIES.
Never lived to see his son not get into the Baseball Hall of Fame.
2016: ACTOR STEVEN HILL DIES.
The very first star of "Mission:Impossible."
Dinner last night: Spinach, mushrooms, and onions sauteed in garlic and EVO.
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