Wednesday, October 3, 2007

Wednesday Night is the Nastiest Night of the Week

The utter absurdity of it all this week.

---I did not watch the premiere of ABC's "Caveman" series. Actually, I have programmed my TV to explode if I ever tune in to this channel at that time.

---The TV writers are voting to strike in the future. I'd like to vote that the Caveman writers go now.

---Along with the writers of CBS' Monday night yakfest lineup. Except for the "Big Bang Theory," which has been mildly amusing, those sitcoms are dreadful.

---The worst is "Rules of Engagement," which sports one of the most detestable characters on TV as played by one of the worst actors on TV, Patrick Warburton.

---And David Spade is in it, too, still pushing that impish college frat guy routine.

---And he's also pushing his mid 40s as well.

---I watched the season premiere of "Brothers and Sisters." In it, Sally Field's character gave a speech about the Iraq war, which sounded very similar to her Emmy acceptance drone.

---Of course, this episode was filmed two months before the Emmys.

---Hmmm, said I.

---The Rockies won the tiebreaker for the wild card in the 13th inning.

---And Matt Holliday still hasn't touched home plate. A blown call by umpire Tim McClelland, who won't be getting any comp passes to San Diego's Sea World.

---Nine hours after the game, this call has already been loaded onto McClelland's Wikipedia page.

---And that's where I discover he was involved in the George Brett pine tar incident as well as the Sammy Sosa corked bat fracas.

---Just who are these little Wikipedia elves anyway?

---Obviously they're people who have a lot of time on their ends, in between loading every single opinion they have on some daily blog.

---Oops, went one too far, didn't I?

---If you thought the Mets' Tom Glavine had a rotten weekend, try walking in from the bullpen in the Padres' Trevor Hoffman's pants.

---One strike away from clinching the Wild Card slot on Saturday, Trevor blows the save.

---Last night in the tiebreaker game vs. the Rockies, Trevor blows the save and the season.

---He's a future Hall of Famer with 500 plus saves.

---And has done nothing in his career. A statistical whore.

---Like the Mets' hillbilly closer, Billy Wagner, Trevor Hoffman has never come through in a crucial situation.

---Don't forget that he was 50% responsible for last year's 4 consecutive home run comeback by the Dodgers.

---The save rule needs to be changed. If you reduce it down to a lead or 2 runs or less, the list of true closers shrinks by 67%.

---Ha ha. LA Mayor Senor Sleazy's girlfriend got exiled to a Riverside TV studio by Telemundo. She promptly quit.

---Now she's free to get a desk in City Hall.

---Instead of being under a desk in City Hall.

---Meow.

---One very interesting sidebar story to my buffet dinner at the Dodger Stadium Club. Thirty minutes before the game, there is one lone Dodger on the outfield grass doing his pre-game exercises. Two days before the end of the season and they're out of the pennant race, but this guy is still doing his work.

---Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you Juan Pierre.

---The guy hits nothing but singles and can't throw further than down my apartment hall, but still he keeps working.

---There's now always a spot on my team for Juan Pierre.

---He just needs to stop wearing his hat like he's Porky from the Our Gang shorts.

---You know what the rat bastard Wilpons are more worried about in light of the Mets grand el-foldo? Pre-sales on season tickets for Shitty Field.

---Which explains why I got an e-mail of apology from that scum bucket Jeff Wilpon. He's sorry the Mets let the fans down.

---I wonder if he sent one out in Spanish.

---You're in the bank at the end of the day and there are two old fossils hogging tellers with inane questions about their ATM cards.

---If I'm running the country, I would isolate the hours between 10AM and 3PM for anybody over 75 or 80 to go about their business. Doctor's appointments, the super market, etc.. Drive around till your heart's content. At 301PM, you better be at home watching a Matlock rerun.

---I'm just saying.

Dinner last night: Beef Enchilada at Pink Taco.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I thought "Cavemen" was cute. "Big Bang Theory" not so much.