Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Well, We've Changed and It's Still Wednesday


I experienced change this morning. New outfits, new socks, new underwear.

---Looking at the heifer in the picture above, don't you want to know how many times she cut the buffet line at one of those inauguration parties last night?

---They were all focused on which designer Michelle Obama was wearing. Everybody forgot to notice that Oprah was dressed in the tarpulin from the old White Sox' Comiskey Park.

---Really....when can we be rid of this cancer? Maybe she'll just overeat so much one day and explode into one big pile of gristle and BBQ sauce.

---There is no truth to the rumor that, as he took the oath of office, Obama responded "Yassur. I'se do."

---After two days of Black Appreciation Day, where do Swedish-Americans get their day in the sun?

---And I think Sweden's days in the sun are naturally longer. Good for them.

---What's with all the junk they're celebrating to commemorate Obama's presidency? Plates, silverware, ties, coins.

---My Obama toilet seat is on order.

---Obama became President on Muhammad Ali's birthday and the ex-boxer attended. He was the one in the crowd not standing still.

---Ali on the new President: "Garble, mumble, mumble, garble, spit, mumble, mumble, wheeze."

---Obama coming into the country at this time is sort of like the supermarket hiring a new stock boy one hour after an earthquake.

---"Cleanup on aisles 1 through 12."

---Wouldn't you like to be a fly on the wall when Obama finally got to see the top secret folder of just how bad off the country is?

---So much blood drained from his face that he looked like Casper the Friendly Ghost.

---"Gee, Bush was right. We are fucked."

---After watching clips of the Inaugural Ball, I can tell you what part of Obama's DNA is white. The chump can't dance a lick.

---Bottom line: even though I am inherently distrustful of all politicians, I am solidly behind our new President.

---And I really hope they didn't serve cauliflower last night.

---For me, though, the real American hero this week is that pilot who orchestrated the crash landing on the Hudson River. This guy is the one who should be idolized by all Americans today.

---A friend noted that the US Airways landing coincidentally happened on the same day that Ricardo Montalban died. I had to think about the connection. And, then...

---"De plane, boss. De plane!"

---Hope you used that Circuit City gift card.

Dinner last night: French dip sandwich at BJs.




6 comments:

Anonymous said...

O, Bummer

Proud to say I didn't watch a minute of the DC love-in. Did see a photo of Aretha's hat. This woman refuses to fly but is not afraid of silly headwear.

Anonymous said...

BTW: great photo.

Anonymous said...

I like the photo even more today.

Anonymous said...

Liking it even more.

Anonymous said...

More still.

Anonymous said...

Sorry. You're now a close second.