In Happier Times

By now, you have probably heard about Alec Baldwin's voice mail message to his 11 year-old daughter, Ireland. I wasn't at all put off by his rants. They pretty much duplicated what I say to a telemarketer that interrupts my dinner. But, what did surprise me is the public's reaction to this news. Was there a slight tinge of surprise? Hello, McFly?? I can swear I saw Kim Basinger in Staples buying file cabinets just to save all the temporary restraining orders she's had against this slug. He obviously never watched Robert Young deal with Kitten on "Father Knows Best."

Now, I actually know several women who think this guy is the bee's knees. I have heard him described in terms that sounds like they came from the Vermont Teddy Bear catalog. Lovable. Such a cutey. Huggable.

Huh?

How many inappropriate displays of violence do you need to complete your correct assessment of his personality?

Haven't we heard of actresses who have reportedly feared taking the stage with him?

Are we not all too familiar with the exact dimensions of the formerly Baldwin-Basinger driveway that is always photographed with him slamming a fence in her face?

What is it not last October that I saw video of him screaming at a NYC firefighter who would not let him cross a street because he would be walking into an area of a burning skycraper apartment that was the final resting place of Cory Lidle's airplane?

Now, usually I can dissociate my creep-o- meter from someone's acting abilities. And, actually, I remember liking what he did 23 years ago during the season he was on "Knots Landing" as a demented Evangelistic minister (Is there any other kind?) But, if you take a closer look at the film roles he's had, you'll realize that he is not that good an actor. Because, indeed, he's not stretching himself that much. Go ahead, do the IMDb thing. In every single movie, he's either playing a tough guy, a philander, or some other pillar of the community. And, don't drag up "Thomas the Tank Engine" because he was only the narrator of that cartoon. And don't tell me what a fantastic comedic talent he is. Nobody but the newspaper critics watches that "30 Rock" thing. A comedy show that is not funny about another comedy show that is no longer funny. Double negatives, your table for four is waiting.

So, Oscar nom not withstanding, all the work he gets (and he does about 3 films a week) really is not all that impressive. He's not reaching too far into his soul for motivation.

Nope, I have never been a fan. Oddly enough, he's the bright spot of the family---that jail cell better known as the Baldwin Brothers.

If he's still considering a move to Canada, he should focus on Vancouver. At least, he'll be in the same time zone as his daughter and they won't have all those phone mishaps again.

Dinner last night: free chicken wings at Hooters. How? Dodger promotion: if the they score ten or more runs. your ticket stub gets them free within 48 hours.